


Houden

by ShijinHada



Category: Samurai Warriors, Shin Sangokumusou | Dynasty Warriors, Warriors Orochi
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe, Comedy, Crack, Gen, Out of Character moment for attempted comedy, Unusual Character Cast in an Unusual Situation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2018-09-16 21:18:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 67,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9289991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShijinHada/pseuds/ShijinHada
Summary: In a post war-torn, twisted world where humans and demons exist under the watchful eyes of tangible deities, one warlord took the peaceful way of not involving himself with the crazy world where virtually anything can happen.Enjoying his 'early retirement', he wanted to make sure nothing got in his way to fulfill his desire. Too bad the world just wouldn't let him do so, with occasional rogue demons, the new celestial bureaucracy and just plain weirdness kept coming his way.





	1. This isn’t a rip-off. It’s an affectionate parody… Okay, it is a rip-off; so sue me all you want. Then again, take it easy and don't do that. Please?

“A long time ago, two time periods were living relatively peaceful without any intervention from each other whatsoever. That is until; a certain serpent king decided to combine both periods and created an astral world from it. The serpent king, alongside with his demon army ravaged through both worlds, striking fear to humans that faced them. Humans came to be pressured and bowed down to the serpent army, as they easily trumped mankind with their superior otherworldly powers. Brave humans from all gathered time periods united and resisted against the demon army; yet, all that proved futile until the mystics descended and gave humanity its powers, knowledge and technology. Now, the chaos that ran through the astral world has somewhat died down ever since, and humans, demons and mystics are living side by side in ‘relative’ harmony. Th---”

The narrator’s voice was suddenly cut by a raspy voiced man.

“Just cut to the chase! You’re gonna put us all to sleep with your exposition, you idiot!”

“What the-?! Lord Ujiyasu?! You’re not supposed to appear yet! I haven’t introduced you properly.”

“Screw that. By the way, I’m supposed to be the main character here, right? In this Gin**** rip-off thing. Me being the leader with that Guan girl and you here being the supporting cast.”

Before the narrator could react to the intruding man, a voice of a young girl reached into the two’s ears,

“Supporting cast?! We’re the main characters alongside you in this rip-off too, uh-huh! Just because you’re biased in a fan’s mind, doesn’t mean you get all the privileges, ‘kay! Tell him, Xu Shu!” the girl nudged her arms to the narrator.

“P-please you two, stop saying this is a rip-off! And by the way Yinping, why are your speech patterns like that? Why do you suddenly talk so coarse? The audience is going to be confused with your sudden change of character from canon.” the narrator protested.

“Didn’t you get our message? This is a rip-off of Gin**** with Warriors, or Musou, characters if you want all to be “Asian”. I’m pretty much *****ki, you’re just a pair of glasses and this girl here is our illegal Y*** immigrant.” explained the raspy voiced man.

“Ugh, the unoriginality makes me wanna hurl… Hm-! Ble---“ the girl started to make noise as if she seriously wanted to throw up.

“Stop! Just stop!” the narrator shouted at the two, “Cut it out, you two! If you keep this up, then we’re really going to be in a lot of trouble by the people in J*** and Gin****’s fans! Also Yinping, Ka**** doesn’t throw up this early in the story!”

“Well, look who’s talking? You suddenly went out of character and sound the part as our resident straight man,” the raspy voiced man continued, “Since you did that, that just outright confirms that we are ripping off Gin****’s essence of the story…”

“That’s a bad move there Xu Shu. At this rate, the author of this fanfic is going to be sued for sure because of you, uh-huh.” the girl retorted in a fake sorrow tone.

The narrator was at his boiling point after enduring and pointing out the jabs that the two intruders had just thrown at him. The narrator shouted at them as loud as he could,

“Go back to your posts already! Thanks to you two nitwits, I didn’t manage to introduce the three of us as planned!”

“So what’s the big deal? It’s not like you have to sync up with an animation or something.” the raspy man nonchalantly quipped back.

The narrator impatiently pointed to the space behind the two intruders, showing a scene of Ujiyasu Hojo mouthing a mute one liner while pointing his cane towards a group of snake demons.

The raspy man and the girl looked blankly at the screen for a few seconds before realizing what happened. Their eyes widened to the point that the red veins showed up in their eyes and their jaws dropped in surprise.

“The hell?! I was supposed to deliver a cool one liner in my introduction scene! Now no one’s gonna shout, ‘Kyaaaa Ujiyasu, you’re so cool!’”., the raspy man posed his hands in front of him as if he was ruined.

“My introduction scene… I totally missed my introduction scene!” the girl cried with her hands scrambling her hair.

The narration was falling apart as the narration space was filled with cries of regret from the two intruders. Seeing the whole event, the narrator just sighed and ignored the two while trying to continue on with the story,

“Huh, get over it already…. A-anyways, this is the story of a warlord and his faithful allies!”


	2. First chapters aren’t usually memorable and are more dramatic instead of funny, unless whoever writing it is good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're off starting the story proper! Enjoy...

On the borders of the Odawara castle town during the dead of night- the border guards found themselves in a frenzy. The guards shouted at each other, giving orders to tighten up the security.

“Spread out! Before he gets away!” one guard shouted.

As the guards spread out obeying the given order, a shadow of a young man passed through the now scarcely protected area to make his escape, yet in a panicked and distressed manner as he stumbled quite a bit that caught the attention of a single guard left on the area.

“T-there he is!” the guard blew his whistle

“Urgh!”

The young man began to frantically run as his presence was spotted. With guards tailing him, it seemed to be a matter of time before they would catch up to him. Through luck, however, he managed to get away by hiding on a dark alleyway he happened to saw after shaking off the guards.

The young man was dressed in a white cloak attire with green colors along with it; a red colored dagger was hanging on his hand.

The next day…

The Odawara castle town. It was a thriving and busy castle town no matter where people go. It had been crowded and well developed even before the serpent king’s supernatural descent to the human kind took place. But ever since it had survived countless battles and received much alteration it can take by humans, mystics and the serpent king’s power itself, it became a hub for all beings in the astral world.

In a market center of the castle town, the townsfolk were busy carrying out their shopping errands for the day.

“Whaddya mean I gotta pay for a crap like this?!”

A loud shout echoed through the market, attracting the attention of the people close enough to the source of the voice.

“P-please sir, I do not mean any harm… B-but y-you must pay—“, an old street vendor was nervously pleading to the one who shouted.

“Huh? Don’t ya know who you’re dealing with?”

It was one of the snake demons that came along with the serpent king’s descent. He was one of the pale, snake-skinned demons with two sharp teeth sticking out from his mouth. Backed up with other two snake-skinned cronies of his, the serpent demon continued to threaten the old street vendor,

“You lowlife worm, I’ll teach you how to treat your customers!”

He pulled out a large spear before thrusting the blunt end of it to the terrified old man.

“S-Stop that!”

The scene that happened was abruptly put into halt by a voice of a young man.

He looked like he was in his late teens judging from his appearance. He had a messy black hair with a thin layered mustache and goatee on his face. From his clothing, he looked like as if he was another street vendor on the area with his light green yukata robes.

“P-please, don’t cause us any inconvenience. Just pay him for the stuffs…” he timidly asked the serpent demons that was causing the scene.

The bystanders stood there, watching the next chain of event that would unfold from this turn of events, with none of them willing to intervene out of fear for their own well-being.

“What?! Just who do you think you are, you little scum?! You dare talk back to our boss like that?!” one of the cronies shouted at the young man, flinching everyone present, except the demons.

The demons charged at the young man in a fit of rage. It all happened in a flash as they proceeded to punch him directly on his cheeks, causing him to lose balance and fell to the ground.

“Heh, this is what happens when you mess with your superiors!” the snake cronies gloated before proceeding to step on the young man, who tried to shield his head from further hits.

During this time, the old street vendor ran away into the crowd – trying to find the closest patrol guard around.

“That’s enough! I’ll handle this one myself.” the snake demon leader stopped the beating of his underlings,

“Hey human, you willing to cover the cost for us?”

“Y-yes…” the young man slowly got up to face the demon boss. “Whatever it is you want then I’ll cover it. J-just… please stop all this…”

The snake demon leader smirked as he suddenly found an idea around what the young man just said.

“You wanted something from the old man, right,” the young man searched his pocket. “I have the money so-“

“That piece of crap? You don’t have to do anything about that. We decided we wanted to take you as one of us.”

“W-What?!”

The young man reacted in surprise followed by the snake demon cronies before they quickly agreed and laughed. The bystanders have decided to ignore this whole event and pretended nothing happened, as the demons began to threaten the young man.

“You did say you’ll cover whatever we want, right? Then you’ll have to come with us since we got nothing from this good for nothing city.” the snake demon tugged the young man’s hair. “If you don’t comply, you might just lose your head. Haha…”

The demons laughed before proceeding to drag the helpless young man away. He didn’t expect things would go violently wrong with all this. He wanted to ask for help but he just couldn’t call anyone as he fearfully looked around.

It was then…

**_BANG!!!_ **

“Ow! What the-?!” the snake demon boss was suddenly shot on his wrist, forcing him to let go of the young man.

“You bastards, what the hell’re you trying to do to that guy?”

A lean and gruff looking man that was towering the rest of the people present was standing a few feet away from them with a long range weapon pointing at their direction. His height even triumphed against the rampaging demons. The young man was just as surprised as the demons as he looked upon the one who saved him, inspecting his attire one by one.

“That armor, that long red-black cape, that bandana, his aura…. H-he’s….!”

“I was comin’ here to my regular stand but he’s nowhere in sight… I had to get out of bed early for that old geezer too...” the gruff looking man said with an annoyed tone while he scratched the back of his head.

The young man was sitting on the ground in awe of his savior. The way his savior looked may not be what he expected, but there was something within him that made the young man sure on who he was.

“This person is a Warlord!”


	3. Expositions aren’t so bad. Unless that nothing is built up from it then that’s a different story.

The market square of the Odawara castle town was usually peaceful. It was currently, however, facing a problem with rogue demons that came there.

“I was comin’ here to my regular stand but he’s nowhere in sight… I had to get out of bed early for that old geezer too...”

The young man had just encountered- what he thought- a Warlord. A warrior that used to head into countless wars during humanity’s early resistance against the demon army. He believed these people were no longer regularly seen as great battles against demons were no longer a commonplace due to mystic’s intervention, but he was sure this man was one of them.

“You bastard! You dare shot our boss like that?!”

The snake cronies charged at the presumed Warlord, who was still preoccupied with his problem. The young man took notice and reflexively shouted,

“Look out! They’re charging at you!”

The gruff Warlord took a quick glance with one of his eyes towards his opponents while still maintaining an uncaring posture.

“You morons! Do you know how many hours of sleep I need?!”

In a matter of flash, the Warlord had already been a step ahead of the demons; bashing hard with his weapon on the two cronies’ head, causing them to fall unconscious to the ground. Seeing this, the young man’s eyes were reflecting his bewilderment- so was it the same to the snake demon boss who watched his underlings easily defeated.

“Y-you idiots! Why are you so weak like this?! T-then… I-I’ll just-“

The snake demon boss turned around to run away in a panic. The Warlord’s eyes turned to face the fleeing snake demon. His eyes were sharp and they seemed to be the eyes that would induce fear to anyone who was unfortunate to be glared by them.

The warlord suddenly jumped high into the air before then thrusting his right foot onto the snake demon.

“Idiots like you….!” The Warlord shouted, “Need to be crammed about sleep cycle!!”

It was a checkmate. Moments before the kick landed, the snake demon let out a high pitched shriek with his face in tears and snot coming out from what could be said as a demon nose as he looked back to his coming doom; an unfitting expression for any demon.

The trouble-making demons had been taken care of. With the demon boss on the Warlords’ feet and the Warlord’s weapon on his shoulder, the crowd of onlookers that gathered back after the Warlords sudden entry cheered at the heroic sight. The young man still couldn’t believe what he saw. He was still sitting there speechless, gazing at his rescuer.

_Amazing…_ he could only sound that in his head, _Oh, I didn’t manage to see his weapon. Surely a Warlord like him would wield…_

He directed his gaze to the Warlords’ shoulder. What that weapon was… confusing to say for most people.

_A-a cane...?_

He narrowed his eyes in response to his confusion. He could’ve sworn he heard a gunshot.

_But wait, I did see him pointing his cane for a weapon at the demons. Does that mean…_ he kept pondering, _No, that sounded something like a certain purple umbrella instead of a normal weapon. Wait, where did that idea come from? Why was an umbrella I never even knew it existed or not popped out in my mind like that? But just maybe…_

His thoughts were still jumbled on that idea before he was snapped back into reality by the guttural voice from the Warlord,

“Tsk, don’t get all cheery! Guys like these are nothin’ but a pain on my back.” The Warlord was about to take off, before he turned to the young man, “Hey, if you’re working around here then tell that old geezer he owes me the usual.”

With that, the Warlord turned his back and walked away from the market square. As he walked away, a sound of tossed coins could be heard coming from the Warlord and before the young man realized it, gold coins were on the ground in front of him.

“Wow! Was that who I think it was?”

A clamor was heard from the crowd of onlookers.

“Yes, I think it was him. The Lion of Sagami!”

That name struck a chord on the young man, who reacted to the name his eyes widened in surprise before he whispered to himself, “The Lion of… Sagami?”

“I didn’t think he would still be around, but-”

The onlookers’ conversation was cut short by the young man, who was suddenly in front of them looking very serious.

“Please, tell me what you know of that Warlord earlier!”

“O-Okay… But don’t you have a booth to man?”

Meanwhile…

“Argh… The hell am I supposed to do right now?”

The Warlord was walking around the castle town aimlessly after coming to the market square only to find demons causing trouble there. The Warlord was visibly irritated as he kneaded his forehead behind the black colored bandana.

“Huh, maybe I’ll just go and check out that other store…” he kicked a little pebble as he talked to himself, “Ah, but it’s across town and I’m on foot today… And my back’s starting to ache thanks to those lowlifes at the market…”

The Warlord rubbed his back while thinking of another thing to do to pass his free time, when a shrill voice reached his ear,

“Wait!”

“Hmm?” The Warlord turned around to the source of the voice; the young man that he saw on the market square. He seemed to have just run a mile sensing from his loss of breath when he managed to catch up with the Warlord.

“Hah…hah… please… wait….”

“Oh, if it isn’t Villager A. You got something to say for me?”

“Hah...hah… please…wait….”

“Hey, this guy really is Villager A! He said the same line two times when I talked to him. So, got anything else to say?” The Warlord leaned closer to the young man, who was catching his breath, while cupping his stubble chin.

“Who’re you calling Villager A?!” The young man snapped back as soon as he was done catching his breath.

“Ah, so he has a second line after I speak to him the third time. I guess this one is one of those recruitable NPC types…” The Warlord stared at the young man with some hint of staged fascination.

“What do you mean by that? I’m not getting it at all from you!” The young man reacted to the Warlords’ quips again.

“Now he’s saying something out of character. I guess this is the part where you are gonna give me a sidequest so I can recruit you.”

“Will you please stop?!” The young man reacted with irritation again before steering the conversation back to its main purpose, “Well anyways, I wanted to thank you for saving me back on the market square today!” He slightly smiled to the Warlord before bowing to him as a sign of his gratitude.

“Hah?” The Warlord dropped his jaw in confusion.

“That is why please…!” The young man suddenly kneeled in front of the Warlord dramatically, furthering the Warlord into confusion. “Please let me follow you!”

“What?”

An air of awkwardness was flowing around the Warlord’s space seeing someone he didn’t even know suddenly kissing the ground and begged to be his mentor of sorts. The whole ordeal certainly made the Warlord uncomfortable, as he started to become annoyed in reaction to the so thought second-hand embarrassment,

“What’re you trying to say, you stupid idiot? Do I look like someone that’s taking a random stranger to be my protégé?  And aren’t you supposed to be back there, watching over whatever the hell it is you’re trying to sell?”

The young man was taken slightly aback from the Warlord’s question before he faced the Warlord in his kneeling position and told him the truth,

“I… uh… don’t actually work there…” He sheepishly averted his eyes as he said.

The sound of popping veins was audible from the Warlord after hearing the young man’s confession, as he began to wildly point at the young man.

“Then what are you trying to do to me, huh?! Don’t tell me your one of those random encounter Thief A on those tutorial villages instead?! Give me back my money, you bastard!”

“Well, I was going to return the gold piece you gave to me too…” He smiled sheepishly while scratching his head, before instantly reacting, “Wait! Thief A?! Random Encounter?! Are you treating things like some cheap JRPG this whole time?! Also, don’t you see that this is a big-almost like a capital-city?! It’s too advanced looking to be a tutorial village, isn’t it?!”

“You idiot! It’s too obvious if protagonists originated from humble villages! That’s why big cities like this are treated as villages in JRPG!”

“What? Why do I get the feeling you just implied yourself to be the main protagonist with that? Stop trying to lean yourself on the fourth wall like that this early in the story, will you? It really makes people confused and is starting to piss me off!” The young man continuously pointed things off erratically,

“Anyways, how did our conversation ended up with me pointing unnecessary things out?!”

“Ha! Just give me back my money, you…!”

The Warlord somehow managed to gain distance to sprint towards the young man despite the fact he was just an elbow’s length with him before. The young man didn’t waste time to point out the inconsistency with the distance as the Warlord began to pounce at him while shouting,

“You Thief A!”

“Wha-? What’s with this person?! How the hell did you do all that in a few seconds?!”

It was safe to say that the young man’s request to be the Warlord’s protégé was rejected outright by the whole buildup. At least that’s what he thought to himself. As the ensuing comical argument ensued, the door of a supermarket near the two opened, revealing an adequately tall young lady with a slight brunette pony tail hair, wearing dominantly pink robes with an aqua colored obi on her waist. Parts of her long-drawn, brown hair was tied into a small tail by a pink ribbon, adorned with flowers, giving her a delicate and composed aura. She was carrying two heavy looking shopping bags on both of her arms with no problem, contrasting to the point of negating her feminine figure and previous description.

“Now that settles a month’s worth of shopping...” She happily hummed to herself. “Ah? Isn’t that Xu Shu? Who is he with right there...?”

The young lady narrowed her eyes towards the argument that was happening nearby her.

The Warlord and the young man, which was the mentioned Xu Shu, were caught in a deadlock with Xu Shu feebly resisting the Warlord’s fist with his arms.

“Got you cornered now! Now, drop all what you have!”

“Gwaha! Now you’re the one who’s trying to mug me!”

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO THIS INNOCENT YOUNG MAN, YOU BASTARD?!”

An extremely loud shout was heard from the supermarket’s direction, causing both Xu Shu and the Warlord turning their head towards the source of the shout. The young lady was running towards them in an unbelievably fast speed with her groceries in hand before flashily springing herself to the sky.

“M-Milady!”

“Huh? Your l- Guh-haah!”

Before the Warlord could finish his sentence, the young lady had just returned back from the jump and delivered a powerful blow to the Warlord’s face with her heavy grocery bag.

“What are you trying to do by stepping on the weak, HUH?! People like you need to be taught of society’s manners!” She shouted as she continued on to beat up the Warlord’s face by violently swinging her grocery bags in succession.

“Gwa--! What’s with this girl?! Clearly, you’re the one who’s out of touch with society by thrashing me like a wild gorilla! Bwaa--!”

The young lady delivered an uppercut to the Warlord’s jaw. The force of the punch combined with her groceries instantly knocked out the Warlord as he landed on the ground with an audible thud.

“Hmph! Let this be a lesson to you, you lowlife bandit!” She smirked on her victory before running towards Xu Shu with a worried face, directly contrasting her violent expressions and actions she just demonstrated to the Warlord.

“Xu Shu, are you okay? Did that man follow you then hurt you in any way?”

“Ah well, I’m fine milady! Don’t worry about me...”

The young lady was not convinced of Xu Shu’s answer and examined him more thoroughly before realizing that he was slightly bruised on the face.

“Hah! You’re bruised! It must be because of that man! I’ll teach him not to mess with-”

She rolled up her robes’ sleeves and was about to run towards the unconscious Warlord again before Xu Shu restrained her hands and sternly shouted,

“Milady, please stop! That person is going to cross to the other side soon if you take it further! Besides, I was actually the one who followed him.”

“Eh?”

“This man actually helped me from a rogue demon band today. From the looks of it, he looks like the Warlord of this area...”

The two walked to the unconscious Warlord, whose eyes turned completely white and his nose was bleeding a bit from the young lady’s thrashing.

“A Warlord of this area? This man right here?”

“W-well, I’m not so sure myself... But...”

“Hmm... He looks more like a supermarket entrance’s local yankee than an actual Warlord. But, since you said that he saved you, maybe he might be at least someone worth of respect.”

Xu Shu beamed to the young lady, feeling that she believed his story somewhat at least.

“Milady...”

“However!” She suddenly slightly shouted causing Xu Shu to flinch. “The fact that he’s beaten up like this was a result from you being careless out there. Why would you follow someone you barely can confirm if he’s good or bad?”

“Well, yes I was perhaps wrong on the latter, but isn’t the first one was wholly because of you?” Xu Shu pointed out with a slight deadpan tone.

“Anyways, we can’t leave him here. Xu Shu, help me drag him to our home. We have to question him on few things.”

“Yes, milady!”

* * *

 

“Nn...nnn...”

The Warlord woke up although had not fully gathered his consciousness as the world in front of him was still blurry and wobbling, trying to form in his eyes. As soon as his vision became clear, two figures were already standing in front of him.

_Huh? What’s this? Who’re they?_ he thought to himself.

He saw the young man that he confronted looking more timid than when he saved him and seemed very apologetic as he bowed back and forth and mouthed repeatedly,

“I’m sorry... I’m really sorry...”

In front of him was the young lady that knocked him out with her punch. She was giving an eerie smile that didn’t match her eyes that were closed shut and oozing a killing intention.

“Heh?! Wait... Wha-?!”

It hit him that he was no longer lying down on the town’s streets after being uppercut but was sitting with his hands completely tied to his back and feet in a tatami room of an unknown home.

“My, you finally came back to your senses, Mr. Warlord. Do you still remember who we are, I wonder?”

“Milady, I think that’s enough… He’s scared enough to talk,” Followed by Xu Shu mumbling to himself, “Although tying him up like this was never necessary in the first place…”

The Warlord tried to keep his cool in check before he replied,

“Of course I remember! A boy and his rampaging pet monkey trying to kill me with shopping bags…”

As if a switch was turned on inside her head, the young lady kept her smile and her dark closed eyes before closing her distance on the Warlord. The Warlord was feeling unsettled inside but tried to keep a straight face.

“How rude! Calling someone’s dearest a rampaging pet monkey. Xu Shu here would never hurt a fly.”

“Milady, I don’t think the monkey part was referring to me as much as it is you!” Xu Shu shouted in retaliation to her remark.

The young lady clenched her knuckles before throwing a punch at the Warlords face.

“Eeehee—heee….!”

The Warlord had just barely missed her punch by ducking to the sides, while slightly screeching his voice in a slight panicked tone. The punch hit the wall instead and left a hole.

“Well, now that your tough guy demeanor is gone, let’s move on to what they do on these confrontations. Xu Shu, give me the blades needed so I can cut his head off for the seppuku rites.”

“Seriously, what’s wrong with this girl?! First you almost killed me with groceries, now you want me to commit seppuku?!” reacted the Warlord. “Hey, you’re this girl’s caretaker, aren’t you? Do something about her!”

Xu Shu, with a meek and unconfident look, approached the young lady and extended his hand to her shoulders before gently pulled her back behind him.

“Milady, please leave the rest to me….”

“Ah? Oh yes, go ahead Xu Shu.”

With one gentle pull and Xu Shu’s calming voice, the killing intention aura from the young lady disappeared in an instant. Although she still kept her fake looking expression of a smile.

“Um, anyways… First things first, my sincerest apology that things turned out this chaotic because of me.”

Xu Shu untied the knots that tied the Warlord’s feet and hands together. The Warlord twirled his wrists for a bit in order to feel his hands after becoming a bit numb from the knots, before standing up with Xu Shu following suit.

“Ah geez… Well, apology accepted as long as you keep that woman on a leash.”

The Warlord swayed his neck left and right, which a cracking noise could slightly be heard from it.

“Ah, erm… Yes,” Xu Shu looked back to the young lady behind her who was still putting a fake friendly smile to the Warlord.

“Anyways, I wanted to properly give you back the gold pieces you gave me on that market today.” Xu Shu extended both of his hands on which the gold pieces were.

“Heh, well that was something I was gonna do anyway before I got beaten senseless,” The Warlord sighed as he took back the gold pieces from Xu Shu’s hands. “If you’re not a merchant on the town, who are you two then?”

“Right, forgive our manners. I am Xu Shu. Just some other person you meet every day on the streets….Haha…”

“Xu Shu, huh? Alright, what about her?”

Before Xu Shu could continue, the young lady walked towards the Warlord and introduced herself on her own, “My name is Oichi. It’s my pleasure to be of acquaintance to you.”

“Oh… yeah then the pleasure’s all mine too…”

The Warlord thought to himself after replying to her, _Her character’s completely changed… By the way, Oichi?_

Seeing how the two awkwardly exchanged glances at each other, Xu Shu tried to continue on, but was beaten again by Oichi,

“I heard everything of what happened on the market square today from Xu Shu: How you stopped rogue demons and then Xu Shu wanted to follow you because he told me that you, a yankee looking delinquent, might be Odawara’s Warlord. Is that really true?”

“Milady?! That last part was a blunt detail!” Xu Shu shouted.

The Warlord smirked at Oichi’s question before he faced on the opposite direction of the two, letting out a smoking pipe and lighter from the torso part of his robes.

“Hmph, What if I am Odawara’s Warlord? Would that make much of a difference for the boy?”

“Perhaps at least you could tell us your name?” She asked further.

The Warlord lighted his pipe, turned around feeling very confident and dignified with his pipe on his smirking mouth, and proudly announced himself.

“I am known as The Lion of Sagami, Ujiyasu Hojo! You got all that, you fools?”

“Hehe…”

“H-Hojo?! Milady, I was right! He really is—Milady?!”

In matter of seconds, Oichi had already again delivered an uppercut to Ujiyasu, with her smile unchanged.

“Gyaahaa…!!!”

“Smoking is prohibited in this home, Mr. Warlord.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should've also put her on the trailer/first chapter....  
> Also, I meant yankee as that Japanese subculture yankii and not the other yankee. But he does look like the one with ee too...


	4. Don’t ever accept candies from strangers. If someone comes to you with that, just decline it. But don’t decline by punching their face!

At Odawara’s market square, the event of the demons causing a scene had passed by for some time as the crowds kept on continuing their daily activities with no one mentioning what happened.

But as the merchants present there were trying their best on shouting out what they sell to potential buyers, the old man from that day’s happening frantically came back to his stand with some men in tow.

“Here! The demons are right here!”

He pointed erroneously to his stand as he lead the way, only to see that there was no one around his stand except for some passerby.

One of them, presumably the leader of the small squad that was brought there, felt annoyed that his time was wasted on what he thought as a false report.

“Hey old man, I don’t know or care what you ate today that makes you seeing things, but seriously, call us when there is something!”

“B-but there was! There were rogue demons and they were about to carry off this young man away and-”

“Right, right… Demons, some guy and flying pixie goblins and so on…”

“What do you take me for, you young whippersnapper!? I saw everything with my own eyes!”

“The fact that you saw flying pixie goblins make everything what you saw untrue then,” The leader then rudely discarded the old man’s reports by changing the topic. “Anyways, we don’t have time listening to your stories. We’re now on a look out of a murderer; a guy last seen hooded on the dead of night. Hey, you there. Show him the poster.”

An idle one gave the old man a wanted poster. The old man took the poster and squinted his eyes for a few times to make out what was on that. It was a picture of the mentoned hooded young man in a dark background. Besides, the white robes and the hood, neither the young man’s body nor facial features were discernable to the old man’s eye.

“Hrrr, how do you expect me to know who this is when the picture isn’t even clear?”

“Don’t complain. This is the best we got.”

The old man gave them back the wanted poster while shaking his head in disappointment of the man’s general unfriendliness.

“Huh, young’uns these days don’t want to respect their elders,” But suddenly, the old man caught a small glimpse of messy hair on the young man’s bangs causing him to jump in surprise. “Oh! That’s him! That was the young man that was almost dragged by demons today!”

The men present were visibly puzzled by the sudden reaction from the old man.

“Do you happen to know his identity or whereabouts?” One of them asked.

“Of course I know!”

* * *

 

Meanwhile, Ujiyasu was still forced to stay in Xu Shu’s and Oichi’s home. The three were sitting down on the living room, with Ujiyasu still rubbing his chin from the pain inflicted by Oichi’s uppercut.

“So, I already got beaten up by a primate disguised as a woman and then dragged all the way here by two people I never crossed paths with, just so that I could just introduce myself,” Ujiyasu threw a sharp glance at the two who were sitting on his opposite direction. “Can I just go now?”

“No, that won’t do Mr. Warlord. First you have to convince us if you really are an actual Warlord.” said Oichi, feigning pleasantness.

“Like I said before; what difference does that make, you idiot? Besides, your boy is pretty much convinced already.” Ujiyasu replied back with an annoyed tone in his voice.

“But I saw you mugging Xu Shu today, so I can’t trust your claim. So please.”

Ujiyasu took a deep sigh in response. “You’re not planning to be convinced anytime soon, aren’t you?”

Oichi shook her head with her eyes closed and smile becoming visibly more condescending. She was clearly antagonizing Ujiyasu.

Xu Shu quickly took notice of the growing tension in the room as he tried to divert the mood by saying, “Ah, um, yes… Please don’t take her words personally Lord Ujiyasu. She’s just very defensive. I’m sure she believes you deep down.”

“Nope.”

“M-milady?! Please don’t make the situation worse by being blunt now… We came all the way here to live peacefully, not to stir up unneeded conflicts.”

“Oh? But I’m not causing any conflicts. I’m trying to prevent conflicts happening for the people around here by cornering this biker wannabe.”

“B-biker?!”

The whole conversation turned into a small argument between Xu Shu and Oichi, annoying Ujiyasu further as his eyebrows twitched a bit.

“Oi!” He shouted at the two after reaching his boiling point, smacking the small table in the room causing both of them to swing their heads at his direction.

“I don’t care whatever it is you think of me but hearing two people like you yacking is starting to get on my nerves,” Ujiyasu stood up and faced the garden in front of the living room. “I’m gonna tell you two something, so listen up.”

“…”

“Hmm…”

“I’m just a man bounded by his own stubbornness to linger around and keep watch unto something that used to be his,” He looked up at the clear blue sky with his arms crossed. “Odawara… A land that used to belong to humans under watch from a fool of a leader… No matter how much it changed because of those mystics or those crap, I’ll protect everything and whoever’s in it, even if I’m a Warlord or no Warlord. You fools got that?”

“Lord Ujiyasu…”

Xu Shu was visibly moved by Ujiyasu’s short speech as he looked at him from the back in awe. Oichi, on the other hand, did not seem to be too affected by the story as she sat and kept a straight face.

“Were you trying to sound cool like a shonen manga protagonist, Mr. Warlord? Forgive me, but that was quite corny to say the least.”

Ujiyasu unexpectedly broke out of his cool demeanor and turned around to Oichi with shock on his face.

“Geh?! Are you serious?! That was my best bit and you’re still not gonna believe me?”

“No, I believe you. Hearing out your speech, I do feel and respect your will to protect what’s important to you. Because even if what’s important to you seemed like or it was taken away by something unavoidable, you still cling on to that strongly…” Oichi stood up before walking towards the garden. She stopped in front of a small branch planted on the middle of the garden and petted it gently.

“That… reminds us a lot about ourselves… Why we came all the way here to Odawara.” Her tone turned quite sorrowful while trying to keep a composed face.

Ujiyasu was quite dumbfounded at how things suddenly turned melancholic.

“Oi, oi… What’s with the sudden tear driven plot point here? And you two; I had a feeling you ain’t from Odawara, but care to explain what’s going on here?”

Xu Shu coughed slightly to clear his throat and to get Ujiyasu’s attention before he started to tell him,

“Well yes… Just like you said, we’re not from Odawara. We actually fled quite a long time ago from Odani…”

“Odani?”

“Perhaps you’ve heard of what happened in Odani, Lord Ujiyasu?”

* * *

 

_Odani castle was overwhelmed by a large army. The soldiers were not demon soldiers, but were humans. They were not those human-like mystics or was there sign of divine or supernatural intervention. They were as human as the people they were attacking in that castle. They plundered whatever they could and mercilessly hunted down anyone within their range._

_Within the castle, a blond haired Warlord donned in aqua-colored robes and a gold-lined armor on his chest was viewing the whole tragedy through the castle’s veranda. The battle was a complete loss for his side, yet there was no sign of despair on his face. Behind him was Oichi sitting down on the floor with her face in utter sadness as if she was about to cry. At the same room was Xu Shu on the same sitting position as her albeit he seemed stronger on holding back his tears._

_“Ichi, Xu Shu, I feel very blessed by the heavens itself to have such a lovely wife and a very loyal follower. Truly, it has been a fulfilling life for me…” The Warlord spoke._

_“…” Xu Shu clenched his hands on his lap._

_“My lord…!? Oichi shouted in reaction to the Warlord’s words._

_“The state of Odani is now dire. Perhaps it is true that we have no chance of winning, but I will not give up for everyone here,” He turned around to face the two with positive expression on his face. “That is way I will stay here and protect this place with all my might! I want you two and the others to go and live on!”_

_“Lord Nagamasa?! W-we can’t leave you here! Because… because we want you to live on with us,” Xu Shu suddenly stood up and shouted with his voice shaken. “We promised each other that we would all live together in a peaceful world…”_

_He looked down._

_Nagamasa approached Xu Shu and tapped his shoulders._

_“Xu Shu, you have improved a lot ever since our household found you. But you are still young; you have the whole future waiting for you! So please, I want you to leave with Ichi and the others from Odani, and fine your place in this world.”_

_Xu Shu gritted his teeth in silence in reaction to Nagamasa’s words. Nagamasa directed his attention towards his wife, Oichi._

_“Ichi, I love you and I always will,” He crouched down to his wife’s position, who was diverting her eyesight away from him. “I promise you that you will see a land filled with happiness; I want you to see a world where everyone is happy! Take this with you…”_

_He gave her a small pot with tree branch sticking out of it._

_“…”_

_“This may look like nothing now, but it will grow into something very beautiful. Once it grows big and its flowers bloom, it’s a sign that we achieved our dreams. So please, live on for our sake Ichi…”_

_Suddenly a scout rushed over into the room with his breath in tatters while shouting,_

_“Report! The enemy has breached the castle’s gate and has begun a fire attack!”_

_The three reacted to the news in surprise before another scout rushed in._

_“I bring news! The escape blimp has just arrived at the top of the castle. Please hurry before they shoot it down!”_

_“Yes. Alright, I will stay on my ground and fight! Men, escort the two into the escape blimp now!” The Warlord ordered without hesitation._

_“Yes sir!” The two scouts nodded in unison before dragging both Oichi and Xu Shu._

_“No! Please go with us, my lord!” Xu Shu shouted as he was being taken away._

_The blond, youthful Warlord just smiled and prepared his weapon, a large, silver lance, to face the impending enemy._

_As they were being escorted away to the escape blimp, Oichi held the pot tight in her chest before she loudly cried her husband’s name,_

_“Lord Nagamasa…!!!”_

* * *

 

“That was the last time we saw him… We fled from one place to another after that. No matter where we went, there were always either greedy Warlords or rampaging demons causing chaos. We felt like we were being tailed too by the attackers in Odani…”

“Ho…”

Ujiyasu seemed mildly interested as he listened to Xu Shu’s story.

“Then one day we came across Odawara; an impregnable castle town safe from any danger from its constant watch of the mystics. Also it’s because this castle town has a strong Warlord as a defender, which we believe it’s you, Lord Ujiyasu. Afterwards, we decided to settle here and continue on with our lord’s will.”

Ujiyasu scratched the back of his head as soon as Xu Shu finished his story before saying,

“Ah geez, I can’t stand things that suddenly turn dramatic. But I’ll give you some word of advice if you wanna stay here in Odawara,” Oichi turned back to face Ujiyasu with Xu Shu preparing himself of the word of advice. “Don’t ever waver. Odawara is pretty much as dirty and chaotic as any other place in this world no matter what they say otherwise. If you make one simple misstep, then you’ll just turn out to become another idiot like the rest.”

“…Yes.” Xu Shu nodded.

Oichi stood there speechless, as if she was trying to discern Ujiyasu’s words.

Feeling that he answered his purpose for Xu Shu and Oichi, Ujiyasu took his cane from the living room’s walls and prepared to leave.

“There, I listened to your sob story and gave you words of wisdom. I’ll take my leave now.”

“Ah, wait a moment, lo-“

Xu Shu’s plea was cut short when a loud whistle was heard directly outside of Oichi’s and Xu Shu’s home.

“Hah..!” Xu Shu gasped to the whistle.

“Huh? What’s going on outside? What’s with the sudden whi- hrmmm?!”

Xu Shu quickly grabbed Ujiyasu by the mouth and dragged him away from the home’s entrance. Oichi, seeing how Xu Shu reacted in a panic, was taken in surprise and walked to him with a concerned look.

“Xu Shu, what’s wrong? Why do you suddenly look like you’re fidgety?”

Ujiyasu struggled for a little bit from Xu Shu’s grip. Xu Shu’s grip was unexpectedly strong for Ujiyasu to let go off as he was dragged back to the living room before he finally broke free.

“Gah! Hah..hah…” Ujiyasu panted for air before angrily shouting at Xu Shu, “Oi! What’s the big idea, you idiot?! Are you seriously trying to kidnap me?!”

“Ah- ah… mmm...”

Xu Shu went silent to think on what he was about to do. Something within him told him that the source of the whistle were sent to his home to address an important affair, but there was a very important person, at least according to him, in his home at the same time and he could not let them see him.

“Xu Shu…?” Oichi asked again worryingly.

Having not managed to think things thoroughly, and mixed with franticness and rush in his decision, Xu Shu forced Ujiyasu inside a cabinet too cramped for a person of Ujiyasu’s size or any normal human for that matter.

“I’m sorry, Lord Ujiyasu… But, please hide here for now!”

Xu Shu began to hysterically stuff Ujiyasu inside the cabinet.

“Wh-wha—bah…! You idiot, what’re you trying to do here!? There’s no way I can fit in someplace as small as this!”

Oichi, who had been standing and watching the whole event, suddenly sternly shouted to Xu Shu, “Xu Shu! Stand down!”

Ujiyasu, who was barely halfway shoved inside the cabinet, shifted his head towards her with Xu Shu doing the same.

“Oh, so you can be sensible at a time like this after all!” Ujiyasu happily said, “Now help me get-”

In another few seconds, Oichi had gained enough distance to drop a flying kick into Ujiyasu’s chest while letting out a small shout.

“Hah!!!”

“Buuuu---”

The kick caused some bits of saliva to fly out of Ujiyasu’s mouth, as he was also completely shoved in from the force of the kick. The force made its way to the cabinet, causing its doors to tightly close in with Ujiyasu inside it.

“I have no clue on what you’re planning, but that, Xu Shu, is how you’re supposed to shove a person inside a small box.”

She smiled to Xu Shu, who was caught a bit off guard with her sudden action.

“Oi! Seriously, is this girl working for the yakuza?! Scratch that, do you two ever even behave normally with other people?! No sane person would stuff someone into anything when they meet for the first time!”

Just as Ujiyasu finished his angry shouting inside the cabinet, one of the man waiting outside yelled,

“We know you’re in there! Come out or we’ll force our way in!”

“Oi, help! There are weird people holding an old man hos—syaaaha…!”

Oichi punched the door of the cabinet, leaving another hole on it.

“You be a good boy and stay silent, okay Mr. Warlord? Get your face away from the hole while you’re at it if you know what’s good for you,” Silencing Ujiyasu inside the cabinet, Oichi turned around to face the men waiting outside her home before saying to Xu Shu,

“Xu Shu, I don’t know what’s going on, but stay here and leave this to me!”

“M-milady, please don’t go ahead blindly like that...!”

Xu Shu trailed behind Oichi, who was approaching the front door, before one of the men outside forcefully slid it open. It was the same group of men that was called by the old man in the market square; with each of them carrying a sword on their thighs. None of them looked like they were an official guard or do they seemed like anyone recruited by the high rankings. They looked more like rogue vagabond units.

Xu Shu did anticipate for the worse that officials he can reason with will come, but he did not anticipate bandit-like groups to find him instead.

“Wh-who are you people?” Xu Shu stuttered.

One of the vagabond units took a peek on the piece of paper he is holding and glanced back and forth between it and Xu Shu, who became nervous.

“Oi, are you sure this is him? He looks a lot more scrawny than in this picture.” One of the followers nudged the leader-like one, who was checking the resemblance.

Oichi tried to barge in on the problem. She was feeling nervous about the sudden visit from the armed men, but braved on and approached the leader while trying to keep her composure.

“It was very rude of you to forcefully come inside our home without our permission. Is there something I can help you with?” She asked the leader while feigning her friendly smile.

The vagabond units looked at Oichi with a confused expression, thinking why a woman they had no business with was standing right before them. At this point of the confrontation, Ujiyasu managed to silently break out of the small cabin and sneaked closer to the hallway leading to the entrance. Ujiyasu peeked his head a little from the sides to take a look on what was going on. He was a quite surprised himself to see who Xu Shu and Oichi were confronting.

_Wait a sec… they don’t look like anyone I’ve seen from Odawara…_ He thought to himself.

Xu Shu was at loss on what to do. What came on his mind first was to pull Oichi away from the leader-like vagabond. Before he managed, though, the leader-like one snorted,

“Hah! You got a lot of spunk missy! But we only want to see your little man over there, so just scurry out of our sight.”

“What are you saying? Xu Shu isn’t the type to be taken by hard gays like you.”

“Milady?! What are you saying out of the blue like that?!”

Xu Shu’s face went red from the embarrassment. Ujiyasu palmed his forehead in reaction to how seemingly random Oichi’s words were.

“That idiot…. She’s only making things complicated…” muttered Ujiyasu.

The leader did not seem to be angered or fazed by her words. He became unexpectedly quite amused at Oichi’s tenacity.

“Hah! This girl’s interesting! Well, since you look like you won’t budge, how ‘bout if we tell you this,” The fake friendly expression on Oichi’s face turned serious as she prepared to hear the leader out. “We suspect your little man here’s a wanted guy around these parts. We heard he might be uh… -what’s that word- ah, a murderer.”

“What?”

“The hell…?”

Both Oichi and Ujiyasu widened their eyes in surprise to the leader’s revelation. Xu Shu was just as shocked at that as he was taken aback.

“What nonsense are you talking about? Xu Shu never did anything that makes him wanted!”

“Why don’t you see it here with your two eyes.”

The leader handed Oichi the wanted poster. There were few texts that explained reasons of wanted under the picture.

“Wanted; a white cloaked murderer. Reward for those who capture the murderer of…” Oichi paused in shock for a bit before continuing, “A high ranking general?!”

_What the…?! Seriously?!_ Ujiyasu was as surprised as Oichi from further revelations about Xu Shu.

“M-milady, I-I can explain…” Xu Shu timidly spoke while also extending his hand to Oichi’s shoulders.

Before his hand reached her shoulders, Oichi had already turned to Xu Shu’s direction with her eyes turning teary.

“Xu Shu… What did you do? Tell me that this man here isn’t serious!”

Xu Shu could not lie to her. He was afraid of the consequence if he would lie to Oichi. But what made him more afraid at that point was not that Oichi would become furious, but the fact that she was about to break down from this sudden reveal of his actions behind her back. Oichi’s sad face was the last thing Xu Shu wanted to see for as long as he was with her.

“Forgive me, Lady Oichi… but yes, I was involved on a murder of this high ranking general…” he confessed.

Oichi gasped with both of her hands in her mouth, dropping the poster to the floor. Ujiyasu, who had been watching the unfolding event, opened his mouth in disbelief that a mild mannered, in most cases so far to him, young man such as Xu Shu would do murder.

“I had no other choice! That man was one of the generals that had been following us since what happened in Odani! At least, that’s what I’m sure he was!” Xu Shu suddenly became defensive and assertive as he continued, “If I didn’t do anything, he might have… he might have done something unimaginable to us…”

The whole home became silent for a short while before laughter from the vagabond’s leader broke it.

“Haha! I’m surprised that he confessed instantly. I thought he’ll keep denying until we make him spit out the truth.”

“But I have told you what you wanted to hear, haven’t I? I’m ready for you to take me away.”

Xu Shu faced his back toward them with his hands behind also, preparing them so they could be tied up.

“Heh, this is all too easy. Alright boys, take him in.”

Ujiyasu could not stand seeing how the confrontation turned out. He was about to prepare himself before suddenly,

“Stop right there!” Oichi loudly shouted at the men that were about to tie Xu Shu’s hands.

Everyone present directed their attention to Oichi, who seemed tranquil in contrast to her recent coarse shout. Ujiyasu held himself back again into hearing how things would develop.

“This young man here never did anything wrong. If there is someone to be responsible for the whole incident then that would be me: This young man’s mistress!”

Oichi pounded her chest, pointing herself with full confidence.

“Hey, what is she planning to do?! Does she even know who she’s dealing with?” angrily muttered Ujiyasu again.

“So in exchange for Xu Shu’s freedom, take me instead! I will take full responsibility for all his actions.”

The colors drained from Xu Shu’s face as Oichi finished her sentence. She appeared serious on giving herself over for a crime that he committed. The thought of him having to lose his lady because of himself caused Xu Shu to lose his composure and become hysterical.

“W-what are you saying, Lady Oichi?! Surely you do not mean...”

“Xu Shu, you’re always so loyal and think many steps ahead for those you care about. I know that even since we first found you back in Odani,”

Oichi pulled Xu Shu away from his position on about to be captured by the vagabonds.

“You are always a good person and I’m very grateful for that. That is why I’ll take responsibility here for not managing to stop you from killing somebody out of vengeance for our sake, because clearly I didn’t do well on teaching you on that matter.”

“Lady Oichi, don’t say such words! It all sounded as if we will never see each other again.” He yelped.

A few exchanges in whispers and snickers happened among the vagabond unit before they came to a conclusion.

“Normally, we wouldn’t agree on sudden change of plans like this. But, seeing you seem to be sure on it, we’ll take you instead of him. So come with us miss, you have a lot of explaining to do.”

Oichi nodded in agreement to his words. Her hands tied in front of her, she was taken away by the five men vagabonds before she turned around to see Xu Shu one last time. A genuine smile formed on her face, as if she was trying to assure Xu Shu that everything would be fine, as she walked away from their home.

“W-wait…” Xu Shu fell down to his knees due to the shock at the sudden turn of events. He wanted to chase after them, but he was too shocked and sad to move.

“Tsk, didn’t see this one coming…” silently commented Ujiyasu from the living room’s door.


	5. If your kids fell down from their bike, don’t tell them it was the bike’s fault for not doing its job properly! Blame yourself for not putting training wheels beforehand!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may have referenced something in the end.... Okay the whole thing is a reference but.... Yeah...

Xu Shu was sitting on the veranda that was facing the garden with his face down, feeling devastated from the sudden loss of Oichi to the hands of unknown rogue vagabonds.

“I… I’ve done it again…” He rested his face on his knees before continuing to sob his monologue, “And this time… to…to someone like Lady Oichi… I…”

Just then, an approaching footstep was heard right behind him. Xu Shu turned around to see who was behind him. It was the Warlord, Ujiyasu.

“Yo, you okay there, boy?” Ujiyasu greeted in an uninterested voice.

“Lord Ujiyasu... How did you get out of that cabinet?” Xu Shu kept his despaired sounding tone while returning his gaze towards the garden.

Ujiyasu glanced at Xu Shu’s depressed state before shrugging off with a sigh, taking his pipe and lighter out from his robes.

“That mistress of yours left a big hole on your cabinet. So of course it was easy for me to get out using that hole, you idiot.”

Xu Shu did not react to Ujiyasu’s quip as he just kept sitting there motionless. However, a strong scent of tobacco reached his nose accompanied with a very thick smoke from behind him. Xu Shu quickly turned around, seeing the source of the smoke: Ujiyasu was lounging lazily on the living room’s floor with his pipe lighted in his hand.

“Hey, what in the world are you doing?!”

Ujiyasu lazily tilted his head up to Xu Shu’s direction. “Hmm... well you look like you’re gonna brood for some time so I took my time smoking here.” said Ujiyasu casually.

“Don’t smoke inside someone else’s home! Just how inappropriate are you?!” Xu Shu frantically shouted while pointing his finger to Ujiyasu.

Ujiyasu lazily got up into a sitting position with one of his leg shoved in front of him. “Oh shut up... Tell that to your mistress. Punching and beating up anyone at the drop of a hat.”

The pipe on his mouth swayed to the other direction as Ujiyasu pouted.

Hearing Oichi being referred to as mistress by Ujiyasu caused Xu Shu to become down again as he slowly limped down to the floor, completely contrasting his outburst to Ujiyasu. Ujiyasu noticed the sudden change in Xu Shu’s mood and was slightly surprised, but did not take any action to it as he just kept sitting and looked at him.

“Do not refer Lady Oichi as my mistress please…” Xu Shu softly spoke.

“Nnnn…”

“W-well, perhaps it’s true that it’s natural that other people see it that way, but Lady Oichi is….”

Xu Shu paused for a bit to gather his strength and courage to say what he was about to say. At that small window of time, Ujiyasu leaned a bit closer to Xu Shu due to his previously near inaudible voice.

“Lady Oichi is like a mother to me!” Xu Shu suddenly shouted with tears in his eyes and his face slightly red.

“Whoa! Didn’t expect you to shout like that.” Ujiyasu nearly dropped his pipe to the floor.

Xu Shu snapped back to his senses after realizing what he said, facing slowly to Ujiyasu who was still surprised.

“A-ah, forgive my outburst, Lord Ujiyasu!” He bowed in quick succession.

“I-it’s just that Lady Oichi has been taking care of someone like me for a long time. Someone that never know where he is going in life…” Ujiyasu regained his composure during Xu Shu’s small speech.

“I made a horrible mistake in the past that I will always regret,” Xu Shu continued in a slight shaky tone. “But to repeat it again with someone as kind and patient as Lady Oichi… I-”

Before Xu Shu managed to continue, Ujiyasu knocked his pipe towards Xu Shu’s direction, blowing ashes to his face.

“Wha-?! H-hey, what was that for?!” he yelled at Ujiyasu, contrasting his previous quiet sorrowful tone.

“I never met a guy who’s gonna cry this much to a stranger, so I figured that’s one way to shut him up.” nonchalantly replied back Ujiyasu.

Veins in Xu Shu’s head made an audible popping noise in reaction.

“You take back what you said about me and Lady Oichi being abnormal around other people then! You clearly have no idea throwing smoke ashes to other people is a rude thing to do!” Xu Shu angrily pointed out.

Ujiyasu let out an annoyed sigh before replying, “At least it’s not nearly as rude or psychotic as shoving someone you just met inside a small cabinet. Am I right or am I right, you idiot?”

“Guh…!”

Xu Shu froze as he could not find anything to counter Ujiyasu’s last remark. He slowly calmed down as he dusted the remaining ashes from Ujiyasu’s pipe from his clothes. He tried to continue his story, but was cut off by Ujiyasu before he could.

“Alright, I get that she’s someone important to you, so spare me the detailed sob story…”

“…”

Xu Shu swayed his sight away from Ujiyasu’s direction in embarrassment from both Ujiyasu’s correct assumption and his previous wild flow of emotions.

“F-forgive me for all that has happened today, Lord Ujiyasu. I have behaved very inappropriately and told you of our personal problem out of the blue,” Xu Shu reverted back into his previous polite demeanor and apologized once again by giving Ujiyasu another bow, which made Ujiyasu feeling more awkward.

“But I am relieved that I met a Warlord such as you that would listen to us even just a little bit. So I thank you truly for the encouragement you gave me today…”

Ujiyasu felt he never gave him any sort of encouragement. Just then, Xu Shu stood up and was preparing to leave the home.

Ujiyasu realized on what Xu Shu was going to do and shouted at him before standing up, “Oi, do you even now what’re you gonna face? Those guys that took your lady… Those’re people I never saw in Odawara before.”

Xu Shu was surprised at the sudden information and hesitatingly asked Ujiyasu, “W-what do you mean by that?”

“You know it too right? They look like they were travelling bandit units… and a tough one for someone like your lady to handle too.” Ujiyasu puffed out a smoke from his pipe as he finished.

Xu Shu panicked as he realized that.

“T-then Lady Oichi is in…?!”

Xu Shu was about to make a run before Ujiyasu stopped him again.

“Stupid idiot, you think you’re gonna face them all by yourself? I doubt you’ll last a minute with them.”

Xu Shu realized that he wasn’t strong enough to face a group of thugs on his own at once, especially remembering on what happened that morning in the market square. He did not want to disappoint Oichi again with another murder and run tactic that caused them their current conflict in the first place also.

Feeling at lost once again, he timidly asked Ujiyasu who was standing at the entrance of the home, “What should we do know then, Lord Ujiyasu?”

“Call someone who cares about your ordeal for one…” Ujiyasu replied in non-caring tone as he walked past Xu Shu.

Xu Shu fumed again from Ujiyasu’s callous behavior. “How can you be so rude and unassuming at times like this?! I thought that-”

His words got cut off again by Ujiyasu. “Don’t worry. You got someone here to answer that call.” He said with a confident smile directed towards Xu Shu.

“O-oh… so does that mean…?”

“Heh, just don’t get left behind boy.”

Ujiyasu continued to walk towards the castle city’s center with his cane resting on his shoulders. Xu Shu looked at him in awe for a bit before he beamed and nodded to what Ujiyasu said.

“Thank you, Lord Ujiyasu!” he silently thanked Odawara’s Warlord.

* * *

 

Oichi was taken by the, unknown to her, bandit units. When they were drifting further away from the castle city’s borders, she began to doubt that she was dealing with actual responsible authorities.

“Where are we going exactly,” She asked the leader of the group leading her, “Odawara’s authorities’ building doesn’t seem to be anywhere in sight.”

The leader chuckled at her question before turning to face her with a smirk.

“That’s because we’re not Odawara’s authorities, little missy!”

“Eh?! Then who are you and where are you taking me?!”

The bandits only replied to her by laughing at her question as they were nearing their destination, a blimp that seemed to be the travelling bandits’ base at Odawara’s Cliffside in the outskirts.

Oichi was becoming more unnerved as they took her inside of the blimp. She was taken along the narrow corridors of the blimp which formed a maze with its many corners and turns. Doors on each side of the corridor lead to various rooms, but Oichi could not tell what room served what function as they lacked signs. The bandits must’ve memorized the layout of the whole blimp, so thought Oichi to herself.

After passing by the seemingly repeating corridor, they arrived at a room that seemed to be the bandit’s main leader’s room, which is undistinguishable from the other rooms from the doors.

“Boss, we bring you someone worthwhile!”

The unit leader pushed Oichi towards where the boss was sitting, forcing her to sit down in bowing position as a result.

“Ah, you manage to catch the fugitive from-” As he turned his chair around, he saw Oichi who tried to keep a calm expression. Surprised at what he saw, the bandit boss said in a slight flirting tone to Oichi, “Well what do we have here? A sweet and delicate young maiden…”

He walked towards Oichi and inspected her face as he got closer.

“And she’s a very pretty one too…”

“I wouldn’t recommend you to come any closer lest you want me to pluck your eyes out, you lowlife honorable sir.” She retorted with a fake smile on her face.

The flirting smile from the bandit boss quickly disappeared as soon as she said that, as he grunted in an irritated tone before turning towards his underlings.

“Oi, what’s the meaning of this? I told you guys to catch the wanted assassin from Odani! Not some violent woman!”

“No boss, she volunteered herself to come with us. She’s the –uh- mistress of the wanted assassin himself.” one of the underlings answered.

“I see… Hehe…” The boss quietly chuckled as he had a plan in his head.

He turned his direction towards Oichi again who returned to her previous calm face, “So, you’re the mistress of Odani, huh? I can see that the rumors of her beauty are true.”

“My, I can see where you’re going with this… I’m afraid a spineless overweight man with a face only a mother could love will never catch my attention.” She replied condescendingly.

“What?! I have you know at least my granddaughter loves me very much! No matter how my face looks like…” The boss worryingly rubbed his face, causing one of the underlings to snap him out.

“Boss, stick to the mood…”

He didn’t seem to listen as he kept rubbing and massaging his face, before he came back to his senses and cleared his throat.

“Hmph, anyways you sure have a smart mouth. What makes you think that we were targeting you?”

Oichi tried to gather her confidence to answer the bandit boss’ question.

“I know that you people are going after the assassin instead of me. But as you said, I am his mistress and I would like to take responsibility for what he did even if I just realized I am dealing with bandits instead,” She continued her next words with another fake smile, “Besides, most bad guys in JRPG or those kinds of things target the princess character and they’ll force her to marry the big bad, so I’m trying to fill that role.”

“You’re treating this like a cheap JRPG?! You’re in life or death situation for real, you know?!” The boss bandit shouted.

“Well, if death has a face of a pig then I can’t say I’m more afraid than I am disgusted…”

The boss had enough of Oichi’s insults about his face as his foot pounded the floor of the room causing some items to shake a bit.

“Enough! Foolish girl, do you know who I am?! I was looking for talents for my new kingdom.”

“Kingdom?” she asked in suspicion.

“But then my minions found me a beautiful maiden for my harem instead…”

“I refuse.” She spontaneously said.

“Hmph, it’s not like you have a choice here. You were the one to volunteer coming here. Besides if you refuse, we know who you are and we have connections. You know where I am going with this, hmmm?” He smiled devilishly while twiddling all his fingers as if he had thought things through. Oichi slowly realized that the boss could call her pursuers and took her and Xu Shu away from their new life in Odawara.

“He’ll be coming for you I’m sure. And as soon as he’s here, I’ll be taking both of you and then I can realize the kingdom I wanted. Gwahahahaha!”

The boss laughed loudly in victory thinking everything was coming into place.

Oichi was starting to lose her previous confidence as her face was showing signs of distress.

“Oh, what have I done? Xu Shu…” She could only whisper her loyal companion’s name.

* * *

 

At Odawara’s market square, Xu Shu was following behind Ujiyasu who had been walking around for some time.

“Umm… Lord Ujiyasu, What are we doing here? Where is Lady Oichi being held?” asked Xu Shu.

“You think I know that? I don’t even know who’s taking her, you idiot.”

Xu Shu became irritated again as he shouted to Ujiyasu, “You said you know them! Gah, we can’t stay here! Lady Oichi’s going to…”

Noticing how Xu Shu began to panic again, Ujiyasu tried to calm him down with a less gruff tone as he could, “Alright, calm down. I’ll just ask someone.” Ujiyasu scratched his chin while looking around for someone.

A woman passed by Ujiyasu and he waved his hand towards her, making her stop.

“You there. You see, I’ve a lost kid –separated from his pet gorilla- with me right now. So could you tell me where should I take him before-”

Ujiyasu’s conversation with the woman was cut short by Xu Shu’s crashing kick to the former’s head.

“What are you saying?! Please take this seriously!” Xu Shu angrily yelled at Ujiyasu who was rubbing his head in pain from the kick.

“Owowowow…” Recovering a bit, Ujiyasu yelled back, “Why’d you do that for?! I was gonna ask something!”

“But lost kid and pet gorilla?! What are you seeing us as?!”

“I was seeing you as villager A before becoming kid. But now you’re just gorilla B along with your mistress gorilla A!”

“Again with the cheap JRPG delusions?! And who’re you calling us gorillas?!”

The two continued to argue and yell at each other, causing people around them to feel uncomfortable and whisper to each other as they passed by. The woman, who Ujiyasu stopped, silently and awkwardly walked away.

“Argh!! Where did she go?! You idiot, you made us lose our one source of information!”

“What source of information?! The one asking never asked the right thing to begin with!”

The argument continued until a loud whistle was heard causing the two to stop. It was the peacemakers of Odawara with one of them riding a horse.

“Eh...!” Ujiyasu and Xu Shu gasped in unison.

“I just received reports that there are two men fighting in this area. That wouldn’t be you two, would it?” The officer sternly asked.

“Of course not. I was just trying to look for my run-away pet before his actual owner here shows up.” Ujiyasu nonchalantly scratched his head, pretending a smile, as he came up with the reason.

Xu Shu threw a quick glare at him in irritation before facing the officer to apologize. “Forgive us, sir. We were not trying to make a scene. We were actually looking for- Ah?”

The officer scanned Xu Shu for a bit from top to bottom. Xu Shu started to sweat from his brows, and near shakenly asked the officer,

“W-what seems to be the problem?”

The officer whispered to his subordinates before they confirmed among themselves. Ujiyasu took alarm to this and quickly reacted.

“ONE THOUSAND POINTS!!”

He kicked off the man who was riding the horse, as powerful as a musclebound thirty-something man of his age could manage.

“L-Lord Ujiyasu?!”

“You! What are you doing?!” The officer shouted.

Ujiyasu kicked the horse’s side, causing it to gallop away from the market square not before he managed to grab Xu Shu and made him ride in the back. The crowd of people barely evaded the horse’s gallop as Ujiyasu and Xu Shu rode out of the market square.

“After them! Don’t let them get away!” The officer shouted to his subordinates before they start chasing the two.

It took some time for Ujiyasu to control the horse while Xu Shu hanged on tight while closing his eyes and screamed.

“Calm down, you hysterical idiot! I got it all under control. Hrrmph!”

Xu Shu opened his eyes as Ujiyasu managed to properly steer the horse.

“W-what was that, Lord Ujiyasu?! You just performed grand theft horse on local guards?!”

“Didn’t you notice? Those were Odawara security officers. They look like they were gonna turn you in.”

 “Eh?! How did you know that? If so, then how did they…”

“Those bandits probably posted those wanted posters of you around already. Tsk, dirty bastards…”

“Oh….”

The anger and annoyance he just had with Ujiyasu changed into admiration and feelings of gratitude again. But then, he remembered something.

“But aren’t you Odawara’s Warlord? Wouldn’t your people think negatively of you for doing this?”

“Heh…”

Ujiyasu only silently grunted in an ambiguous tone. Noticing that, Xu Shu tried to change the subject before noticing they were approaching the castle town’s borders.

“Lord Ujiyasu, this is the borders…”

“I know.”

“Why are we heading there?”

Ujiyasu smirked before answering, “We were gonna rescue your Lady Oichi, right? I have a feeling she’s right outside these walls.”

“R-really?! How can you be so sure?”

“I’m not.”

Alarmed and panicked again, Xu Shu shouted, “Then don’t just charge blindly! We have to-”

“Turn back and have them catch us? We’re being chased now, you idiot.”

Xu Shu took silence for a bit as their horse continued to gallop.

“This wouldn’t have happened if you didn’t steal this horse…” Xu Shu said in a dry tone.

“And I wouldn’t have stolen this horse if your gorilla never turned herself in.”

Xu Shu became irritated with Ujiyasu’s mentioning of Oichi as a gorilla again, but took a deep breath so to not argue and attract another attention.

* * *

 

Meanwhile inside the blimp where Oichi was being held in; one of the underlings came into the room and reported, “Someone’s approaching us, boss!”

Hearing the report, Oichi widened her eyes realizing that the one coming towards the blimp was probably Xu Shu.

“Hoho... Perfect. Prepare the engines! I want him in here while we’re escaping.”

The messenger bowed to the boss before leaving the room, leaving Oichi and the boss there.

“Well looks like he fell for it. Hehehe….”

Oichi looked at him angrily and said, “Don’t underestimate him. He’s not the type of person that will be easily captured by the likes of you!”

“Oh? How is he going to face all of my men on his own? Surely he will fail.”

Oichi could only continue to glare at the boss as she prayed for her companion’s safety.

_Xu Shu, please be careful…_

* * *

 

On the outskirts of Odawara, Ujiyasu and Xu Shu approached the blimp.

“That blimp… Could it be?!” Xu Shu gasped.

“Well it’s the only one here. There’s no doubt about it.”

The blimp’s engine was already rumbling, signaling that it was going to take off at any moment. Seeing this, Xu Shu became rather fidgety.

“Oh no, they’re leaving! Please hurry!”

“Don’t worry, we’ll get in,” Ujiyasu assured Xu Shu. “At least they want us in before they leave.”

Suddenly the blimp started to fly away before the two even barely made halfway to it.

“Wait, what?” Ujiyasu looked blankly at the flying away blimp.

“Ah… they are leaving! I told you we should have hurried!”

* * *

 

Back inside the blimp, the same messenger came in and reported, “Boss, we have taken off and are leaving now as you said.”

“Good… he should be here any minute now.”

The boss took a quick glance at Oichi who was showing visible signs of distress at this point.

“Yes boss, the anti-fungus crème you asked for from one of our men just got in and is being brought here.”

“What?”

“Heh..?”

Both the boss and Oichi said in unison.

“ARE YOU SAYING THAT WE LEFT WITHOUT THE PERSON I ASKED FOR?!” The boss’ shouting echoed throughout the blimp.

Seeing how furious the boss was, the messenger cowered in fear as he shakenly tried to apologize, “Hiii…. F-forgive me boss… We thought you meant our courier when you ordered us to get him here….”

The boss grabbed the messenger by his collar and slammed him to the wall.

“YOU USELESS PLEB! I’LL HAVE YOU DIE FOR THIS!”

As the boss continued to threaten the messenger and in turn his underlings, Oichi was shaking. Noticing her, the boss’ rage faded and he grinned towards Oichi to taunt her.

“Hehe… well, at least I can still add you to my-”

“YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!” Oichi delivered a strong uppercut to the boss’ chin, sending him flying across the room with a loud thud.

“OI!! WHERE THE HELL IS XU SHU THEN, HUH?! TELL ME RIGHT NOW BEFORE I MAKE YOU ETERNALLY IMPOTENT!!” Despite her threat, she already delivered it by rapidly punching the boss’ crotch faster than the eye could see.

“Uwaahhh… Boss!”

The messenger watched in shock as the distressed damsel turned into a distressing damsel in an instant.

* * *

 

On the outskirts of Odawara, Ujiyasu and Xu Shu stared emptily at the departing blimp with their horse.

“W-what are we going to do now, Lord Ujiyasu?!” Xu Shu wildly scrambled his hair as he was seeing the blimp. “Maybe we should go back and-”

Ignoring Xu Shu, Ujiyasu focused himself and whipped the horse with the rein forcing it to keep galloping faster towards the cliff where the blimp was.

Noticing that they kept on going, Xu Shu widened his eyes in shock.

“L-Lord Ujiyasu?! You don’t mean…!”

“Hang on tight! Get ready to jump when I tell you to!”

“E-EEEEEEH!!! WE’RE RIDING A LIVING ANIMAL, NOT A MOTORCYCLE!!”

As soon as they approached the end of the Cliffside, Ujiyasu forced the horse to jump with another whip. They flew into the air as the wind dramatically blew them towards the blimp.

“Oh, deus ex machina, I guess.”

“W-what?”

“Anyways, JUMP NOW, YOU IDIOT!!”

“NO WAY! IT’S IMPOSSIBLE!!”

“Tsk, then just hold on to me! I’ll make us reach there!”

Xu Shu did not have much of a choice, despite common sense pointed out the impossibility. He trusted Ujiyasu and held on to his shoulders.

“HRRAAAAH!!”

Ujiyasu pressed his feet on the horse, springing him and Xu Shu who was closing his eyes in fear. The horse neighed loudly as it started to fall down below them. The wind kept blowing them into the blimp as they approach a glass window on one side of the blimp.

Positioning his hands into a cross in front of his head, he braced himself to impact the glass window.

**CRASH!!**

With a loud shattering noise, the two got inside the blimp successfully. Defying physics and odds.

“Hah! Told you I’ll get us in here. Open your eyes boy - we’re gonna rescue your mistress.”

Xu Shu, who was still clinging hard to Ujiyasu’s shoulder, slowly opened his eyes as he saw that they were standing on a solid floor.

“W-we made it…” stuttered Xu Shu in disbelief.

Xu Shu got off from Ujiyasu’s back as he walked around the room where they got in; still could not believe that they managed to get inside. Happy and excited that he had a chance to rescue his mistress, He was very grateful for Ujiyasu’s help and tried to come up with words to thank his helper.

_This person here… I cannot thank him en- huh?_

His thoughts cut short as he turned around to Ujiyasu, seeing a large glass shard stuck on his head with few bloods running through from the glass shard.

“Alright, quit dawdling around like that and let’s go.”

Ujiyasu confidently walked pass Xu Shu with his cane hanging on his shoulder.

“A-ah wait Lord Ujiyasu, you got something on your…”

As Ujiyasu opened the door of the room that lead to the hallway, a group of guards were already waiting for the two.

“I knew that someone broke in! Somehow…” The guards prepared their swords before the leading one ordered the others, “Anyways, get them!”

“Uwah…”

Xu Shu froze seeing the guards were preparing to attack Ujiyasu and Xu Shu. Ujiyasu prepared his weapon as well for the incoming attack.

Holding his cane on the handle, he positioned himself into a stance.

“Wait, Lord Ujiyasu! You’re not using a sword but a wooden cane! Are you seriously going to fight with that!?” shouted Xu Shu trying to point out the unorthodox weapon.

“GRAAAAAH!!”

One of the guards charged towards Ujiyasu.

“Hmph…!”

Before the guards managed to land a hit, Ujiyasu sheathed out a sword from the hilt, quickly plunged forward to slash the charging guard. He stood behind the now frozen guard as he held both the wooden cane and sword on his two hands.

“O-oh…”

Xu Shu watched in awe as he saw what happened in front of him.

_I see there’s more to that cane than meets the eye…_ Then he suddenly remembered on what happened at the market square that morning. _But then again, wasn’t that a gun too? A strange weapon indeed…_

“You bastard!”

Another guard attacked, followed by the others.

“HYYAAH!! HRRMPH!! YAAAH!!” Ujiyasu skillfully countered each attack from the guards with quick succession of slashes from his sword and hits from his cane.

_But this person fights spectacularly... To easily fend off that many of guards especially with a weapon as unorthodox as that…_

With his last attacker fell down, Ujiyasu glared to the rest of the guards who were shaking in fear from seeing how easily the intruder beat down their comrades.

“Heh, what’re you looking at? I suppose you wanna be next?” taunted Ujiyasu.

“H-HIIIHII…..” Some ran away in fear while some frantically went to report. “A-alert the rest! We have an intruder on board!”

When the rest left, leaving only Ujiyasu and Xu Shu behind, the former turned at the latter who was still opening his mouth in awe.

“Oi, don’t just stand there - go look for your mistress! The guys are probably gonna come after me after all that, so we’ll split up. I’ll distract them and you go find her, got that?”

Snapped out, Xu Shu was hesitant at the idea of splitting up, but trusting Ujiyasu and wanting to find Oichi as soon as possible, he nodded.

“Yes! Please be careful Lord Ujiyasu.”

Ujiyasu gave Xu Shu a quick grunt before the two parted ways in the corridor.

* * *

 

Xu Shu ran through the corridors of the blimp as fast as he could while scanning the whole area. He had been running for a while to look for a room where Oichi was possibly held in, but no luck.

“Hah…hah… it’s no use… All the rooms look exactly the same…”

As footsteps approached him, he was at loss on what to do before he saw a door nearby. Praying to himself that that room was both unlocked and empty, he pushed the door open.

“Hah…hah… phew… I’m glad I got in the right room…”

He brushed the sweat on his brows. As he waited for the footsteps to go by his room, Xu Shu began to wonder about the layout of the blimp.

_This whole place is like a maze… In fact, I might have just passed this area before…_ He let out a small sigh. _At this rate… No, I have to be positive! I’m sure I can find Lady Oichi somewhere in here!_

Taking a deep breath, he opened the door slightly to check if there were still possible guards around. After making sure they had already completely passed by, Xu Shu continued on his search.

As he was searching, he heard a loud banging and rustling coming from one of the rooms.

_W-what’s that…?_ The banging became more audible, followed with an audible yell from a woman. _T-that sounded like Lady Oichi!_

Xu Shu hurriedly ran towards the door and opened it, shouting his mistress’ name, “Lady Oichi, what are--!”

When he arrived inside, the sight of his mistress gripping the legs of what seemed to be boar in human shape with her right feet at the creature’s crotch.

“X-Xu Shu!”

“Milady!”

The two happily ran towards each other and held as if a mother was reunited with her lost child. Realizing their position, Xu Shu quickly snapped back while blushing a bit.

“A-ah, forgive me for being too close like that…”

Oichi chuckled lightly in reaction. “Ufufu, you’re always so reserved. But it’s fine, I’m very happy to see you myself.”

The two exchanged smiles; relieved that they were reunited again.

“But Xu Shu, how did you get here? I thought that the blimp took off already and…” Oichi was cut off by Xu Shu.

“Well yes. You see… I didn’t get here on my own, milady…”

“Eh? Then who…”

“You will see the man that helped me later. For now, we must hurry and—Heh?!”

Xu Shu comically widened his eyes at what he thought was a boar. He had instantly forgotten about it when he was reunited with his mistress.

“L-Lady Oichi, what did you…?”

Oichi noticed the reason why Xu Shu was shocked and casually answered in her friendly tone, “Oh this? This is, or was, the big boss of the bandit gang.”

Xu Shu stared, dumbfounded, to his mistress.

“Eh?! Really?! H-how?! He didn’t hurt you in anyway, right?”

“Fufu, Of course not. I was quite shocked when they told me that you weren’t on board, so I guess fear got the best of me and then I started beating the poor sack up,” She turned her head towards the unconscious boss who was foaming in his mouth, “Maybe I went out too much on him?” She tilted her head in concern.

Xu Shu just nervously laughed in reaction and took her hand.

“At any rate, I’m glad milady is okay. But come, we must get out of here!”

Xu Shu tried to tug her but Oichi refused to move as a look of concern appeared on her face.

“But, how? We’re still mid-air.”

“Ah, you’re right…” Xu Shu froze before shaking his head and tugged Oichi’s hand again. “But don’t worry! We’ll find a way! At least he might have a way…” He whispered the last line to himself.

* * *

 

Having found Oichi at last, Xu Shu ran around the blimp again, this time with Oichi behind him. He tried to navigate around the blimp, while avoiding guards along the way.

“Xu Shu, who helped you get in here?”

He turned around to answer her question, “Ah, yes… Well, you still remember that Warlord, Lord Ujiyasu?”

Oichi widened her eyes in surprise before nodding. “That man that claimed himself to be Odawara’s Warlord? You asked for his help?”

“Yes and no, perhaps. Yes because it was his efforts that I’m here now and no because he was the one that wanted to help me rescue you, Lady Oichi.”

“I see…”

Hearing that, Oichi’s perception of Ujiyasu changed. She started to believe a bit that Ujiyasu was living up to his name as a Warlord and not a thug claiming to be so.

Suddenly a loud rumbling was heard coming their way.

“Oh no, the guards! And they all seem to know we’re here!” said Xu Shu, stricken.

Scanning the area around them, they did not manage to find a door, and when they found a room, it was locked. Seeing no other option, Xu Shu took Oichi’s hand and ran away from the loud grumbling.

“Xu Shu, I think they’re catching up to us!” said Oichi worryingly.

Xu Shu tried to pick up his pace but as his mistress said, the source of the grumble appeared behind them, a horde of guards coming their way with their swords in hand. Both him and Oichi looked behind them and saw a lone familiar figure also running away from the horde with his arms running up and down on his sides with a panicked look.

“Heh?” the two gaped their mouth.

“MAKE WAY!!”

The figure dashed through Xu Shu and Oichi making them stumble for a bit before continuing to run.

“Y-you are..?!” gasped Oichi.

“Lord Ujiyasu, what happened?! I thought you were going to distract them?!”

“I was until I found you two here!! Turns out there were too many of them!” screeched Ujiyasu his reasons.

Irritated, both Xu Shu and Oichi yelled really loudly, “FACE THEM YOU COWARD!!”

“Don’t run along with us!” continued Xu Shu.

Annoyed, Oichi asked Xu Shu, “Is this the one that helped you get in?” she directed her annoyed gaze to Ujiyasu. “I guess I was right. You really are just a Yankee delinquent with no balls to match his behavior!”

Hearing the two’s remarks on him, Ujiyasu angrily turned his head around and yelled to Oichi, “What’s that supposed to mean?! I know I made a bad impression but come on! I’m trying to save both of you here!”

“And not doing a good job at it!” she retorted back.

As they were running and navigating through the blimp, round black objects kept falling out of Ujiyasu’s cape. Xu Shu barely managed to avoid them all.

“Gwaha…! Lord Ujiyasu, don’t you notice the things falling from you?!” One of them landed in Xu Shu’s hand. “Wait! These are bombs! And they’re lit too?!”

One of the guards seemed to take notice of Xu Shu’s shouting.

“Wait, did he just say bombs?”

“And they’re lit?”

Suspicious, the guards turned around to notice that the whole corridor was filled with bombs that were ready to explode at any moment.

“WHAAAAAA----!!!”

The whole guards screamed in frenzy after realizing the trail of bombs and were in disarray trying to extinguish the lit, but they were too panicked to even pick them up

Ujiyasu rubbed around his body as if he was checking for something before coming into a realization. Putting up a confident front, he laughed, “Haha! See that? Now those guys are scrambled as planned!”

“Don’t lie! We saw you checking around your pockets! By the way, you’ve been carrying lit bombs this whole time?!” angrily pointed out Xu Shu.

“My, that’s dangerous… A suicidal yankee terrorist…” sighed Oichi.

Noticing the guards were no longer following them, Xu Shu sighed in relief for a bit.

“Phew… they’re gone now… The bomb seems to work….”

“Umm, Xu Shu? Something tad more important maybe?”

Oichi pointed towards the lit bomb that was still in Xu Shu’s hands.

“Oh, yes… GEH!!! NOW THE PLACE IS GONNA BLOW!!!” Xu Shu frantically asked Ujiyasu, “Lord Ujiyasu, you remember where we got in right? RIGHT?!”

“How should I know?! I’ve been running around this place trying to find our exit!”

“THEN YOU DON”T EVEN KNOW WHERE WE’RE GOING NOW?!” yelled Xu Shu.

“Hah… I never thought the day would come I would die from a Yankee’s doing…” Oichi lamented dryly.

“QUIT CALLING ME A YANKEE!! HOW MUCH CAN A BAD IMPRESSION MAKE YOU KEEP THINKING OF ME AS A YANKEE?!”

The three passed by another glass window. Seeing an exit, Ujiyasu shouted at Xu Shu and Oichi, “Stop!” Ujiyasu knocked the glass window for a bit. “This glass looks brittle enough to be our exit.”

Oichi looked at the glass window in confusion before saying in disbelief, “What? We’re going to jump?!”

“It’s not like we have any other choice! We’re gonna dive out of here as soon as I break this, so you two are gonna have to run with me!”

Oichi was surprised at Ujiyasu’s crazy idea to escape. She was at loss before glancing at Xu Shu who looked quite confident for Ujiyasu’s idea.

“Please, we can trust him, milady. I’m confident Lord Ujiyasu knows what’s best.” Xu Shu tried to assure Oichi with a smile on his face.

Noticing how Xu Shu really trusted Ujiyasu despite having just met him that same day, Oichi’s perception to Ujiyasu changed again for the better.

_It’s not everyday that Xu Shu easily trusts someone. Maybe this man here is a good person after all…_

She nodded to Xu Shu and returned his smile, signaling that she agreed.

Seeing that Oichi had put a bit of faith in him, Ujiyasu grunted in an amused tone. “Heh… alright, you guys ready?”

“Yes!”

The three gained their distance with Xu Shu slightly crouching while holding Ujiyasu’s thigh and Oichi following from Xu Shu’s behind.

“Alright, cover your faces and don’t scream. This could be a high dive for us.”

“Oh yeah, just how far are- Uwaah!“

Ujiyasu ran before Xu Shu managed to finish forcing him to run along.

Thrusting his elbow to the glass window, the force of the blow shattered the glass followed by the three falling down from the blimp. Shortly after they fell off from the blimp, the body of the blimp exploded reducing the blimp into bits of pieces, causing Xu Shu and Oichi to hide their faces from the explosion and the small debris.

“W-we actually made it out…” quietly said Xu Shu while seeing the ruined blimp plummeting down in the other direction.

Xu Shu looked down and remembered that they were falling at an incredibly high speed. He shouted to Ujiyasu before getting shocked and paralyzed from the adrenaline and fear for the worst, “L-Lord Ujiyasu, d-did you even know where we are exactly above the clouds?!” He continued screaming afterwards.

Realizing that, Ujiyasu’s pupils shrunk.

“Ah, you’re right…”

Replacing Xu Shu who could not say anything at that point as he was screaming his lungs out, Oichi yelled to Ujiyasu in anger, “YOU DIDN’T PLAN AT ALL?!”

“WELL WE WERE CHASED BY ANGRY MOBS! I HAD TO IMPROVISE!”

Ujiyasu quickly looked down below him, teeth clenched. The sight of a blue sea and a familiar castle town not too far from there met his eyes. Relieved, he sighed before confidently said to the two, “Alright, hang on! I’ll make sure we’ll survive landing here!”

He tried to force his body to fall to the direction of the sea. The winds pushed him, however, towards land, making it very hard for him to move towards his desired landing spot.

“Come on, don’t mess up now!! HRRAAAGH!!!”

* * *

 

At a fishermen’s village, two men were walking along the shores with their fishing rods in their hands.

“Lately the wind’s… uh… weird, I guess.”

“Tell me about it. I’m not sure if I should go fishing now or-”

Their conversation stopped when one of them heard a loud shriek coming from the sky. Trying to find the source of the shriek, they looked around only to find no possible source.

“Wait, look there!” One of the fisherman pointed at a small dot in the distance.

“I-I think it’s falling!”

“Hurry, we need to get closer!”

Noticing that the dot is falling to the sea, the two fishermen set up their boat to move closer. Before they even managed to get close, the dot had already landed and made a splash upon impact, the shrieking stopped when the dot landed.

Realizing that the dot might be a person, the two fishermen sped up their boat to the area of impact.

“I-it was here, right?”

The two checked the waters for a bit before a shadow from the waters started to appear.

“Uwa- Something’s coming!”

“A-A Seaman-monster..?!”

One of the fishermen stepped back from the water, with the other one coming to the waters where the shadow appeared.

“I-it’s getting closer!”

As soon as he said that, the shadow figure emerged from the water with a big splash revealing Ujiyasu, with his rescues on his back.

“HAAH!!”

“….”

“Ah… Huff…huff…”

Getting on the fishermen’s boat, Xu Shu was frozen in place with colors drained from his face, while Oichi coughed the water out while clearing the wet hair in front of her face.

“I-it was someone! And three of them!” shouted one of the fishermen in surprise.

“Ack… Hrrgh… Huff…” Ujiyasu coughed out the water and cleared his throat. “Geez, just to save a family of violent gorillas...” he muttered to himself.

“H-hey, you’re okay?!” The fishermen approached Ujiyasu.

“Heh, yeah I’m fine,” Ujiyasu directed his gaze to Xu Shu. “Oi, you there. Your heart’s still beating?”

“Namu Amida Butsu… Namu Amida Butsu…” A small chant was heard from Xu Shu’s mouth.

“Xu Shu, you’re not in nirvana yet. Hmph.”

Oichi gave Xu Shu a light pat on his shoulders, causing him to jolt up and coming back to reality.

“A-ah… I…I’m alive…”

“Of course you’re alive, you idiot.” Ujiyasu gave Xu Shu a playful smile.

“Lord Ujiyasu… and…” He directed his gaze besides him where Oichi was, putting a genuine smile and bright eyes on her face. “L-Lady Oichi… We made it out alive…!”

He shouted loudly, tears falling down from his eyes and his hands dramatically extended to the sky in victory.

Seeing Xu Shu’s big reaction, everyone present stood silently in confusion.

“H-hey, could you just sail this back to shore?” requested Ujiyasu to she fishermen, with them replying with an awkward nod.

“My… I’ve never seen Xu Shu shout happily like this before…” said Oichi with her hand hiding her mouth, perplexed.

The three sailed back to shore with the help of the fishermen. Along the way, Xu Shu could not hide the happiness in his face. He approached Ujiyasu and unable to contain his gratitude, he bowed deeply with tears in his face.

“O-oi… What’s with the bowing?”

“Thank you… Forgive me that I can’t find a better way to express my gratitude, but… Thank you so much for saving Lady Oichi, Lord Ujiyasu…” Xu Shu began to bow repeatedly, unwittingly rocking the boat.

“Oi, stop that! You’re gonna make us fall down!” shouted Ujiyasu while trying to keep balance.

“Thank you… Thank you…” Xu Shu kept on bowing.

Seeing the whole scene from the back, Oichi could not help but to smile and chuckle to herself.

_He made a very reserved and closed Xu Shu into someone completely different. And he went through that entire crazy stunt just to save me, huh?_

When they finally arrived at the shore, a large group of Odawara officers was seen waiting for the arrival of the fishermen’s boat. The officers came with their carriages as if they were preparing to take someone away. Seeing them, everyone on the boat became nervous.

“Geh… Don’t tell me they’re…” said Ujiyasu.

“N-no way…” Xu Shu followed.

Oichi just looked at the two back and forth, confused at what was going on.

Before they got off the boat, one of the officers forced his way towards the boat and pulled Ujiyasu off the boat by force before other officers surrounded him.

“Sir, we’re going to have you come with us for the many violations you just did according to one of our officers.” spoke the officer in a sternly.

“Hey, I can explain things!” said Ujiyasu, almost yelling.

“Oh yeah? Tell us that to our horse. She swam back to us with a terrible cold.”

The officer pointed with his head to a horse covered with a large blanket on its body and was shivering slightly.

Both Ujiyasu and Xu Shu gapped their mouth open in shock seeing the horse was there. A heavy air passed both of them. Before Ujiyasu tried to come up with a reason, the officer continued,

“Also, we heard you are hiding a wanted criminal,” He looked at the boat where Xu Shu and Oichi were still on. “That man there matches the description of said criminal.”

Seeing that Xu Shu’s freedom was now in jeopardy, Oichi slightly moved in front of Xu Shu, trying to defend him.

Seeing the two’s reaction, Ujiyasu internally growled before calmly saying to the officers while scratching his head, “Alright, I admit… I kicked that one officer in the face; I performed grand theft horse; and in return, I made that horse catch a cold... Somehow…”

Ujiyasu turned around to point the officer to Xu Shu and Oichi.

“But those two there; they’ve done nothing wrong to deserve arrest. If you still wanna arrest someone though, just arrest me. I’ll take responsibility for them,” Shocked to see that Ujiyasu would sacrifice himself like that, Xu Shu was about to say something but Ujiyasu continued first, “Heh, looks like I’m doing the exact same thing like your mistress right there.”

Oichi widened her eyes after realizing the similarity between herself and Odawara’s Warlord. The difference that she noticed that he seemed to be more prepared and controlled than her, and above all, he went out of his way to help her and her companion; two complete strangers for him.

_This man… I somewhat misjudged him._

After a few discussions among the officers, they confirmed to Ujiyasu, “Come with us. You have a lot of explaining to-”

“Not so fast.”

Ujiyasu looked away from the officers as if he was hesitating but faced them again with a smug smile.

“What if I tell you that I’m…”

He whispered the rest to the leading officer’s ears. Finishing his whisper, the officer widened his eyes in shock and flinched. “I-Impossible! Y-you’re…”

“What happened sir?”

The rest of the officer gathered around the officer whom Ujiyasu revealed something. The officer’s voice was muffled among the crowd but as soon as he finished the others reacted the same way as he did before.

“No way…”

“I thought he was…”

Seeing the whole commotion from the reveal, the smug smile on Ujiyasu’s face changed into a pout as he irritatingly scratched his head,

“Geez, all this commotion from one single title…” He turned back again to Xu Shu and Oichi who were dumbfounded and seemed curious on what Ujiyasu said to the officer. “Anyways, you two are good to go. So see ya.”

Ujiyasu put his hands towards the two while walking away from the crowd, showing no signs of emotions whatsoever in contrast to his previously irritated reaction. He continued to walk away, taking out a smoking pipe from his sleeves before lighting it up.

“Wait!” The officers shouted in unison.

“Huh?”

“Then now you have to come with us to prove if you are the real deal!”

“What?!” His pipe dropped to the ground.

“If you don’t then we’ll arrest you for impersonating someone!”

Xu Shu and Oichi continued to silently watch the rest of the commotion from their boat. Shouts from the officers as if they were begging and praising Ujiyasu was heard, and in return Ujiyasu’s angry voice clearly reached their ears among the muffled voice of the rest.

“Ufufu…”

“Lady Oichi?”

Oichi looked at the crowd as she smiled,

“I can see it all now,” She looked at Xu Shu. “Now I understand why you believe that man is a Warlord, Xu Shu.”

A wide smile came to form in Xu Shu’s face. “You believe him now, milady? I’m so glad to hear that!”

“Well, he still looks like a Yankee with a lot of vice. But, I feel like he is right for us.”

Confused by her last sentence, Xu Shu asked, “Right for us? What do you mean, Lady Oichi?”

“Fufu, it was clear from the beginning you wanted to follow him for one. Also, I can feel the genuineness from his actions; just the right person to help us achieve our dreams.”

Xu Shu widened his eyes with anticipation swelling inside him.

“So… does that mean…?!”

Oichi gave him a nod of approval along with her gentle smile. “Yes, I allow you to be under Lord Ujiyasu’s care. We’ll be staying here in Odawara for good. Well if he refuses, I’ll make him accept us, hehe…”

Oichi clenched her fist while still keeping her smile. Seeing the hands, Xu Shu nervously pulled her hand down and laughed it off.

Determined and confident, Xu Shu stood up from the boat and bowed to his mistress before he left to Ujiyasu, who was running away from the crowd of officers. Seeing how unusually bright and energetic Xu Shu was and how her and her husband’s dream could be realized there in Odawara, Oichi chuckled a bit before leaving back to her permanent home in Odawara.

Xu Shu kept on running after Ujiyasu, not fearing the officers that previously tried to arrest him, as he believed that Ujiyasu had done something to let him free.

_Lord Nagamasa, I found my place. I will start anew right now under Lord Ujiyasu along with Lady Oichi here in Odawara._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tl;dr: Ujiyasu helped Xu Shu rescue Oichi and they all lived happily ever after. Now scroll back up and read the whole chapter properly, because I hid a 75 dollar bill somewhere in there, so get searching.


	6. Looking back into your life, you will see that you made a bunch of choices that you regret now. Yes, especially buying that cheap yogurt from that kiosk you pass by every morning.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Xu Shu is supposed to start training under his new master! But seeing how his lord behaves, will Xu Shu learn anything of use to him?! And who is this woman that appears in the castle?! Why are we doing this "In the next episode..." thing at the start of the new chapter?!

“Oh, you can’t come with me again for today?”

“Sorry Xu Shu. I wish I can go to Odawara castle and start training with you today but I still have to take care of registration and furnishing of our new home.”

“I-I see…” He looked down disappointed.

“But, don’t worry. I’ll be done by tomorrow. So do your best for today too, okay?”

He nodded weakly before heading outside and going to his new lord’s castle.

Almost a week had passed ever since Xu Shu pledged his and his mistress’ allegiance to Ujiyasu. Xu Shu was very happy that he managed to convince Oichi of Odawara’s Warlord’s good qualities among other Warlords. At first at least.

He arrived at the castle grounds, which were deserted for a large castle in a capital-like city. No guards or retainers in sight at the castle’s courtyard; a near barren garden had wild grasses growing in some places, and Xu Shu himself swore that the front gate was in the verge of crumbling. The castle was not how anyone would expect to look like for a Warlord’s home.

Xu Shu looked up the castle keep while adjusting the collar of his white-green coat. “Well, here it goes…”

 He opened the large door of the castle keep, making a large creaking noise that echoed throughout the entrance area of the first floor.

The inside of the castle was just as deserted as the castle grounds, with no one but Xu Shu himself present on the first floor. Unlike the garden and the front gate, however, the inside of the castle was mostly well maintained with no signs of it going brittle, although dusts were collecting on the corners and small gaps.

Xu Shu continued walking towards the top floor of the castle keep, where his new lord would be. As his footsteps echoed through the empty rooms, he sighed lightly before putting his hand to the side of his mouth. “Lord Ujiyasu, I have come for the training again today…”

Hearing no answer, Xu Shu sighed again before repeating, “Lord Ujiyasu, I have come for the training again, so…” Arriving at the top floor, he slid open the door of the one room there. “Please get up…”

In the middle of the room lay Ujiyasu in his red sleeping robes with his hands extended to the opposite direction of each other, snoring between his breath and drool coming out a bit from his mouth. The futon he was sleeping was disoriented as if Ujiyasu had moved a lot during his sleep.

“Um… Please wake up, Lord Ujiyasu…” Xu Shu nervously tapped on one of Ujiyasu’s hands with no results.

“Zzzz…. Nnn…” Ujiyasu changed his position facing away Xu Shu. Seeing this, Xu Shu let out a big sigh.

_This again… Do we have to do this every time I come here?_

Xu Shu shook Ujiyasu. “My Lord, please wake up. The sun is already shining.”

“Mmrrhh… Mama…. I’m a grown adult already… I can sleep till noon for all I ca… Mrrmm…” Ujiyasu loudly mumbled in reaction while shaking off Xu Shu’s hand, seemingly not noticing it was the latter’s in the first place.

Veins began to pop inside Xu Shu’s head. He clenched his teeth and tightened his fist a bit but still trying to keep a calm voice. “Urgh… Grown adults have to be productive too. So please get up, or else I’ll-!”

Suddenly the door behind him made a sliding noise, notifying that someone entered the room. Surprised at the sudden noise and the possibility of an intruder, Xu Shu hurriedly turned around. “Wh-Who’s there…?”

A figure of a woman with a pale white skin appeared at the room’s door. Her robe was completely white along with the hood she was wearing, bringing a sense of elegance and dignity. Carrying what to Xu Shu looked like a prayer staff, she appeared to be someone that belonged in a temple.

“Oh my… Who is this?” She asked herself in a calm voice with her free hand closing her mouth.

Still quite suspicious of the woman, Xu Shu kept his guard while approaching her. “Ermm… Please answer my question first. Who are you and what business do you have with- Ow!”

The point of the woman’s prayer staff landed hard on Xu Shu’s head. “Fool! That is no way for you to address a guest,” The woman smiled at Xu Shu who was rubbing his head in pain. “You must always properly introduce yourself to others before asking further questions.”

_W-what’s with this person…?! She’s kind of like Lady Oichi with that smile. It’s frightening…_

“F-forgive my rudeness…” Fearing that his well-being was at stake, Xu Shu complied with the woman and introduced himself by bowing down. “I am Xu Shu; the disciple and officer under Lord Ujiyasu.”

Surprised and impressed from Xu Shu’s etiquette, the woman praised him, “Oh, what a polite young man! You’re better than I thought,” She waved her hand upwards to him. “Stand up.”

Xu Shu followed and slowly stood up. The woman examined Xu Shu from top to bottom before closing in on his face. Sweat slowly poured down from his forehead but he could not say anything, fearing the consequence if he opened his mouth.

“I have never seen you before. Have you always been here?”

“Ah n-no, I have actually just begun to serve and train under Lord Ujiyasu for almost a week now.”

The woman opened her mouth, perplexed and curious. “Ujiyasu never told me he was taking someone in. Perhaps…”

“Excuse me?” Hearing her casually referring his lord without a title, Xu Shu started to think that the woman was acquainted with Ujiyasu.

She looked behind Xu Shu which was Ujiyasu, still sleeping soundly. Thinking she knew what was going on, she chuckled a bit before saying to Xu Shu in friendly tone, “Well in any case, I wish you well on your endeavor as a member of the Hojo.” She began to walk towards the other corner of the room. She put her hand on one part of the wall as if she was about to press something.

“Th-Thank you, Lady… uh…?”

“Ah, now I’m the one who forgets good manners. How embarrassing…” She shyly looked away before smiling back to Xu Shu while also raising her hand, preparing to slam it against the wall.

“My name is Aya,” Her hands made smashing contact against a hidden button, causing the whole wall of the door’s opposite direction to open up, revealing a balcony and slowly letting the bright sunlight enter the castle keep’s top floor. “Please refer to me as Mistress Aya, understand?”

Aya’s skin reflected the sunlight from the open window to the point that it shined brightly like a polished diamond. Her smile radiated the same brightness as her skin as Aya became literally too bright for Xu Shu to see.

_Wha-?! What the heck is this?! I’ve never seen a person literally shining bright like this! Is she what they call a goddess?_

The light from her subsided as it turned out to be only a short after effect from the opened window. Xu Shu slowly redirected his vision towards her, who was still smiling at him.

“Y-Yes, M-Mistress Aya…”

_By the way, I never knew there was a switch to open the window there. In fact I didn’t know that WAS a window seeing it looks like one of the walls…_

Aya directed her attention towards Ujiyasu, who seemed to be mildly annoyed by the sudden burst of sunlight blasting through the room as he faced away the balcony, pulling the futon sheets to his face while slightly groaning in frustration.

“My lord, you’re still not up yet? Please get up…” begged Xu Shu to his lord.

Aya calmly walked to Ujiyasu’s side, tightly gripping her staff. “My… I can see you really are new to the Hojo. Hehe, let me show you how it’s done.” She raised her staff as high as her arm could stretch while directing the hilt of it to Ujiyasu’s neck.

Alarmed and realizing what Aya was going to do next, Xu Shu shouted, tongue-tied, “L-Lady- I mean- Mistress A-!”

Aya’s staff, however, had already violently struck and pressed itself against Ujiyasu’s neck as an audible thud, followed by a crack, was echoing in the room.

“GUWAAAAAA—aaaackk….!”

Ujiyasu’s loud choking slowly becoming small but hysterical wheezing for air. Witnessing how contrasting Aya’s friendly expression against her violent action, to the point of psychopathic, Xu Shu stiffly stood still, jaws wide open and with a sudden dry eye.

_M-Murder!!! I’m witnessing a first degree murder!!!_ He screamed internally. _H-He’s gonna die!! Lady- I mean- Mistress Aya, Lord Ujiyasu’s going to die at this rate!_

Ujiyasu, miraculously, still managed to move his hand as, while very shakenly, he gripped Aya’s staff trying to push it away.

“Ah?” Noticing that Ujiyasu was panting and choking heavily with his hand struggling to push her staff away, Aya pulled it away. Ujiyasu reflexively sat up, rubbing his throat repeatedly while coughing and panting heavily for oxygen that Aya had nearly got him killed for lack of.

“OI!!! WHAT”S WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU”RE TRYING TO KILL ME??!!” Yelled Ujiyasu at the top of his lungs, somehow instantly recovered.

“How wonderful; you’re finally awake.” She playfully said.

“Don’t ‘you’re finally awake’ me! I almost couldn’t wake up at all because of you!”

“That’s nice. Well, I would love to discipline you for being a lazy-bum as always but your student is already waiting for you there.” Aya gently pointed her hand to Xu Shu who was still standing stiff on the other side of the room.

“Oh it’s you. So you came early too for today huh?” Said Ujiyasu to Xu Shu while lazily scratching his stubble.

Xu Shu regained his senses as he retorted to Ujiyasu, “Actually, I think it’s you that’s always late, my lord.”

Ujiyasu lazily shifted his gaze to the balcony. The sky was already blue with the sun hanging on the horizon, and sounds of birds chirping complimenting the scenery of the morning sky.

Instead of feeling motivated to get up, Ujiyasu groaned in frustration, laying himself down on his futon again and tucking in. Xu Shu gasped in irritation seeing how lazy his new lord was and shouted while trying to pull away the futon sheets, “Please don’t go back to sleep again! We skipped training last time! In fact, you never trained me since I got here!”

“Shut up... No one asked you to come in so early anyway,” Ujiyasu persistently kept gripping his futon sheet. “Besides, I did train you. You learned that patience is virtue for the past few days. Now keep your voice down and wait for the next lesson for today till I- Aaaaaah!”

“Eh?!”

Ujiyasu flew across the room along with his futon. His body landed on the upper wall above the wall with a strong impact, leaving its trace as he dully fell back to the floor. Xu Shu nervously looked to his side, finding Aya had extended her foot into the spot where Ujiyasu was laying down.

“Foolish dog! A teacher must never leave his student idle even for a second! Now get up, change and teach him something or suffer the consequence! Understand?”

“…Understand…” His voice muffled as his face was still planted on the floor.

“Ah….”

Xu Shu could only absent-mindedly stare as Ujiyasu slowly got up and went down to wash up and change. He looked back to Aya whose eyes had changed from bright and pleasant to dark and menacing as her brows bended to form sharp edges on the corner.

“Hmph… There, now he should properly teach you something as your master.” The menacing glare on her face disappeared immediately as it returned back to her previous calm demeanor.

“Y-Yes…” Xu Shu responded nervously.

Aya’s hand began to touch her cheeks as she swayed her head back and forth as if she was disapproving something. “Forgive me that you had to see something like that, especially seeing you are new here.” said Aya solemnly.

“O-Oh, no need to apologize m-mistress. In fact, I learned something new today, hahaha…ha….” Xu Shu forced a laugh while nervously scratching his head.

“Yes, now let me tell you something about your lord, Ujiyasu Hojo.”

“R-Right…”

The expression on Aya’s face turned stern but not as frightening as when she kicked Ujiyasu across the room. “But first I must ask you. Why do you follow Ujiyasu?”

Xu Shu was caught off guard hearing the question coming out of Aya. He gulped nervously before answering her question as truthful as it could sound.

“Yes… I have heard stories about the ‘Lion of Sagami’: The brave Warlord that fought against the demons ever since the human’s early resistance. I am impressed and moved by tales of his strength and would like to learn from him and devout myself to his cause.”

“Hehe… A standard answer but it seems I don’t need to tell his history seeing that you already know something about him,” she proceeded to tell Xu Shu about his lord. “The man that you are serving has a brave and noble character. He lives for the people, is what one could perhaps say to summarize him.”

“I see…” Xu Shu nodded.

“Hehe… Isn’t it clear from the scars he has?”

Xu Shu internally gasped, his eyes widened. Hearing what Aya said, Xu Shu just realized and remembered that Ujiyasu did sport two large scars, crossing on the right side of his face. _S-She’s right… Last time he helped me, the scar from the glass on his forehead too… Wait a minute, what happened to that one anyway? But nonetheless…_ Xu Shu spaced out, deep in his thoughts as he came into realization about his new lord.

“But it seems you don’t believe me in that one.” she slyly smiled at him causing Xu Shu to flinch, snapping himself out.

“O-Of course not…? W-What I meant was that I believe that, but…”

“But how could someone as lazy and irresponsible like him could be a noble Warlord?” she continued Xu Shu’s lines.

“Mistress Aya?! By all means, I do not think of him that way! But I suppose he was lazier than I thought…” Xu Shu averted his gaze to the sides.

Seeing how Xu Shu frantically tried to be polite about Ujiyasu while trying to be as honest as possible, Aya sensed within Xu Shu a spark of loyalty and devotion. She smiled to herself while seeing Xu Shu who kept on talking to come up with reasons for her. _For Ujiyasu to find a retainer and student such as this young man… He’ll be alright then._

“Yes, very good…” She said after Xu Shu finished, coincidentally at the same time she finished thinking to herself.

“L-La, M-Mistress Aya?” he stammered.

“Please be patient with him. He maybe is very lazy and callous, but when the time comes, I can guarantee his true character will shine,” She threw a sharp side glance to Xu Shu. “Besides, he wouldn’t have accepted you if he lacks that noble side of his.”

Xu Shu was surprised at how serious she appeared throughout the whole discussion about Ujiyasu. He was sure at that point that Aya was someone close to Ujiyasu and was getting curious at their relationship. But not wanting to sound too personal, knowing that they just met, Xu Shu thought for a bit before saying to her, “I can see that yo- I mean, mistress- knows a lot about Odawara.” He smiled.

“Haha… Not necessarily just about the castle town itself as you could see,” She put down her staff on the floor before grabbing both of Xu Shu’s hands with hers, surprising him slightly at the sudden hand contact. “If there is something troubling you, especially about your lord then please do not hesitate to see me. Haha… but I must mention that I often come to visit the castle to speak with Ujiyasu, so I think we will see each other in the future.”

Xu Shu could feel a warm and welcoming feeling radiating from Aya. _Everything about Mistress Aya really does remind me of Lady Oichi… I suppose that’s enough for me to think that she is someone I can trust, seeing she seems to know Lord Ujiyasu too._

“Alright, we’re heading out,” Ujiyasu’s voice came from the room’s door with him wearing his black-red attire: his armor, bandana and haori as a mantle, and with his pipe unlighted in his mouth. “O-Oi…  I know that you’re way past your prime girl, but I thought you knew better than to hit on a younger man…”

Confused at what was Ujiyasu referring to, Xu Shu was about to ask him before realizing Aya was still intimately touching his hands. Shocked, Xu Shu’s face turned as red as a fresh tomato as he stammered while coming up for an excuse. “I-It’s not what you think, Lord Ujiyasu! M-Mistress was-!”

“Mistress…? That’s too far for first base, don’t you think?” teased Ujiyasu further with a coy smile.

“Ufufu… I see that the dog needs to be taught another lesson.”

Aya retrieved her staff from the floor and was walking closer to Ujiyasu with her smile dissonant to the mood and aura she was giving out. Ujiyasu was slowly raising both of his hands with his coy smile unchanging, as if saying to her that he was only playing a joke. Seeing the danger of the situation, Xu Shu yelled out to Aya,

“P-Please stop, Mistress Aya. I-I like girls younger than me, so don’t worry…” He bent his body to look down to the floor as if he was bowing.

Hearing Xu Shu’s last line, the staff from Aya’s hand dropped along with Ujiyasu dropping his pipe to the floor in shock. Xu Shu was confused from the sudden silence as he opened his eyes and looked up.

“E-Eh?” Xu Shu absentmindedly blurted.

“Oi….!” The lips on Ujiyasu’s face dramatically puckered as he sensed an unescapable, imminent doom was coming their way.

“My… Is that so? Fufu… You sure are an honest young man for telling me that.”

Grabbing Ujiyasu by the neck, a loud crack was heard as she dragged him - simultaneously choking him - to Xu Shu who finally realized he had said unneeded things. Sweat started flow in large quantities from his brows as Aya swept his leg, forcing him to kneel.

That morning, the cries of pain and agony of two men echoed throughout the empty castle’s courtyard, causing the birds nested in the area to flutter away in a frenzy.

* * *

 

At the streets of Odawara, the people stopped at what they were doing, seeing two particular people passing them by. Two men in contrasting colors with each other; each with their cheeks swelling as if something was going to come out, bumps towering on their head and the younger looking one sporting a bandage around his head.

“I-I can’t believe it… Every woman I know or met are all very violent….”

Ujiyasu winced in pain as he rubbed his shoulders before saying, “After what you said there, of course they’re gonna be violent, you stupid idiot. Now we both have to deal with two demons in form of gorillas in their period…”

“Stop calling Lady Oichi a gorilla will you? Where do you even get that name in the first place?” Xu Shu weakly retorted.

“I dunno… It feels like we’re ripping off something so I went ahead.”

“…I’m not getting it… Really, I don’t.”

The two men continued to walk, ignoring the curious onlookers and whispers from the crowd who were afraid of how nearly disfigured the two were.

“But may I ask you who La-, I mean, Mistress Aya is, Lord Ujiyasu?”

“You know, you don’t have to refer to her as Mistress Aya. The girl’s not even around.” replied Ujiyasu while adjusting his right arm.

“Even if you say so, I feel like she can hear me. Just who is she and why is she as scary as Lady Oichi when she’s angry?”

Ujiyasu loudly sneered at Xu Shu’s question as the two turned at a corner where a woman shielded her child’s eyes as they passed by, “Hah! Ask the second one to your mistress.”

“You know Lord Ujiyasu, you don’t have to refer to her as mistress…”

Ujiyasu timidly looked around while maintaining his cool by pretending to massage his other shoulder. “She might just jump out at me any second now…”

“You see…” said Xu Shu dryly. “Don’t worry my lord, Lady Oichi is still busy with our new home. She’ll come with me starting tomorrow.”

Ujiyasu puffed up a smoke from his pipe before sarcastically replied, “Really? Can’t wait…”

Xu Shu sighed, choosing to ignore his lord’s sarcastic reply before returning to his first question. “Anyways, please tell me about Mistress Aya. She seems to know many things about you, my lord. Especially… uh…” Xu Shu nervously paused for a bit, stopping in his tracks while Ujiyasu kept walking, before continuing, “About that scar of yours…”

Finishing his sentence, Xu Shu began to regret absentmindedly mentioning Ujiyasu’s scars. He nervously looked towards his lord from the back, anticipating rage and shouts seeing as he stopped walking.

“F-Forgive me, my lord! That sounded too personal! I-I didn’t know my manners! I…”

Apologies after apologies came out of Xu Shu’s mouth as he bowed down frantically and repeatedly, begging for mercy from the anticipated punishment. However, Ujiyasu continued on walking, his usual uninterested demeanor unchanged. Noticing that, Xu Shu, however, kept following him and apologized again, still feeling very guilty.

“That girl that came today is the grand priestess on Odawara’s temple.” His usual calm but gruff voice reached Xu Shu’s ears.

“Lord Ujiyasu…?” Xu Shu said confusedly while wondering that his anticipated punishment did not follow.

The Warlord turned around. “What’s with that look? I answered your question there.” Ujiyasu raised his eyebrow seeing Xu Shu slightly cowering.

“A-Ah, yes...” The young man in white coat recovered slightly. Feeling that his superior was trying to dodge the details of his scar, Xu Shu tried to steer the conversation back about the visiting temple priestess that morning. “But a temple priestess you say?”

Ujiyasu nodded without looking back to Xu Shu.

“But why would a temple priestess like her come to the castle?” He continued asking.

He wanted to mention another detail that Aya often came by to talk to Ujiyasu, but feeling that it might be something personal again, he refrained himself from saying anything further and waited for a reply from Ujiyasu.

“That’s your next lesson. See that?”

The two stopped in front of a gate of a temple complex. Two statues of a fearsome looking deity adorned two sides of the temple gate as if they were protecting it, and a large board hanged on the upper with large scriptures painted in ink written on it.

“This is…”

Xu Shu gazed beyond the gate, seeing a temple complex with few visitors spread across the complex. He looked back at the board, trying to check the temple’s name. The characters were quite worn out as if someone had intentionally scraped them off except the last character, making it hard for anyone to read it.

“…Temple? Lord Ujiyasu, what’s the name of this te-?”

“Alright, let’s get this over with.” Ujiyasu lazily walked inside the temple complex with his cane fixed on his shoulders, ignoring Xu Shu’s question regarding the temple’s name.

“Please wait!”

Xu Shu extended his hand, hastily following Ujiyasu inside.

* * *

 

The temple complex of Odawara. The temple’s ground was middling in size and condition for a temple complex in a large castle town. The two passed by a towering pagoda in the middle of the temple, along some people who were near, somewhat perplexed on their expression, staring at the two men. Xu Shu took notice of the stare but opted to ignore it by looking around his left and right. On the left, there was a relatively large building albeit scarce of presence. On the right side there was another similar sized building, but with more people surrounding the area.

_Hmm… Somewhat strange in structure but what do I know?_ Commented Xu Shu to himself before looking at Ujiyasu, who did not seem to pay attention on the sights at all.

The two arrived shortly to the furthest building on the temple complex. A medium-sized tori greeted the two with its red colors and talismans hanged on the top parchment, giving the vibe of entering a sacred area to anyone who saw it. A large bell was seen a few distance away from the tori as Xu Shu gazed to his left.

_Mmm… I’ve never seen a temple like this before. I guess this shows how big the world is._ Xu Shu dropped a sweat out of bewilderment.

“Alright boy, pay attention,” The gruff voice of his master rang in Xu Shu’s ear, snapping him out from his thought. “I told you that this is where that crazy priestess works at right?”

“Yes, my lord.” said Xu Shu, nodding.

“Alright, so take a look here,” Ujiyasu walked up to the large box in front of the building, rustling his pockets for a bit before finding a coin piece. Standing in front of the box, he showed the coin piece in his hand to Xu Shu. “You see this coin? You throw it into this one box here,”

Sound of the coin rattling was heard as Ujiyasu threw the money into the box. He rang the bell from a rope that was dangling in front of the box, took a few steps back, clapped his hands and stood silently for a few seconds.

“Uh… Lord Ujiyasu?”

Then as if he was hasting, Ujiyasu broke out of his silent still and started to walk away from the building. Understanding what was the ‘lesson of the day’, Xu Shu twitched for a bit before shouting at Ujiyasu, “What was the point of that?! I already know how to pray in a shrine!”

Ujiyasu flinched a bit in reaction to Xu Shu’s loud shouting, before shouting back in a louder voice, “YOU IDIOT! DON’T SCREAM IN A TEMPLE!! THINK OF THE OTHERS SERIOUS AND HOLY ENOUGH TO PRAY HERE!!”

The rumbling voice from Ujiyasu caused the birds nesting around the temple to fly away in fear and people at the other end of the temple turned their head around to source of the shaking wind.

“YOU, DON’T SCREAM IN A TEMPLE FOR THOSE SERIOUS AND HOLY ENOUGH PEOPLE!” Xu Shu tried to out-yell his master. “By the way that was way too few for an offering, wasn’t it!? Gods won’t bless you or answer whatever prayer you had with that!”

Ujiyasu impulsively ran back to Xu Shu’s position and forcefully covered his hand to his student’s mouth, causing the latter to angrily muffle.

“I told you not to scream! No one heard the offering part, right..?” Ujiyasu wildly looked back and forth of his surroundings. After confirming no one was there, he took a deep sigh, before whispering to Xu Shu in a slightly irritated voice, “That priestess girl is the one that owns this temple. When she comes to the castle that means it’s high time I give her ‘offerings’ lest her inner demon takes over, got that?”

Xu Shu pushed away Ujiyasu’s hand and asked him, “Hah? She forces you to donate? She sounds more like a loan shark than a grand priestess then. I see that’s why she said she comes by often…”

Ujiyasu nodded in agreement to Xu Shu’s words. “So you get it now? She actually gives me a quota on how much I ‘should’ give,” Ujiyasu turned around and prepared to go to the front gate. “But I don’t have that kind of money now, so we gotta get out of here before she forces me to pay more.” Ujiyasu hurriedly walked towards the front gate.

“Wait my lord!” Xu Shu followed suit. “But why do you have to donate every so often? That’s more like paying your debt or rent rather than donation.”

“Well seeing you’re an officer of mine now, I guess I’ll tell you more,” Ujiyasu began telling Xu Shu the details and reason of ‘donating’ money to Aya’s temple while kept looking back at the donation box to check if someone was there. “Now when you said it’s more like paying the rent then you’re right. Odawara castle isn’t something I own.”

“WHAT?! IS THIS TRUE?!” shouted Xu Shu in shock.

“Oi, keep it down…” Ujiyasu turned his back to the astonished Xu Shu and lightly tapped the young man’s head before continuing, “Yeah that’s true. And before you’re wondering, yeah I’m still technically Odawara’s Warlord if you still wanna see me that way. But Odawara castle is something that those mystics possess.”

“The mystics?” Xu Shu raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah the mystics. What, you don’t know those guys? Have you been living under a rock or what?” curtly asked Ujiyasu.

“N-No… I mean that…” the young man nervously scratched his head while trying to come up with words that would not sound inappropriate to the revelation. “I-It’s just that… I’m surprised by this, Lord Ujiyasu.”

Xu Shu knew the mystics. They were divine beings that came down from the heavens one day when the humans were struggling and at the brink of annihilation by the sudden invasion of the demon army. The mystics aided the human resistance with their superior knowledge, technology, skills and their familiarity with the supernatural powers that the demons possess. After the defeat of the serpent king and the demons, the humans found themselves unable to separate themselves from the bountiful knowledge and technology that the mystics had brought, and seeing that humans were too undependable to survive on their own and that remnants of demons were still running amok at some areas, they united the many human factions and demons that were willing to reform in their words into one government.

Odawara was one castle town that became a center of activity for the mystic government. But Xu Shu never knew that they would take Warlords’ castle along with their control of the castle town. He always thought that they would never do something implicitly hostile for the world’s stability.

“Hmm…” Ujiyasu looked at Xu Shu, who seemed to have spaced out while they were walking, while lazily rubbing his chin. “Lost in an exposition thought, I see.”

Xu Shu countered Ujiyasu while nervously sweating, “My lord, I was waiting for a response actually…” The young man cleared his throat and tried to steer back to the topic. “Anyways, does this mean that the whole temple –and in turn, Mistress Aya- is working for the mystics?”

The Warlord returned his cane to his shoulder, continuing to walk again while scratching his head, “Well if you wanna understand it that way then yeah, I guess. I don’t really get her and the deal with the temple anyways. All I know is that she forces me to fork over some amount of money or else I’ll get kicked out of my own castle…”

“Then she really is your landlady than anything…” Xu Shu nervously chuckled after finishing his comment. “But wait, don’t you have to face her again later on? She’s bound to know, my lord.”

Surprising the young man, however, Ujiyasu laughed in reaction. “Haha! So there you have it for today’s lesson.”

“Eh? What was it exactly then?”

“Pay your rent by cheating your way out. As long as they’re not around, give your pocket change then admit you paid in full the next time you see them.”

“No… That’s just n—Uwaah…!” Xu Shu froze in place, inches before they arrived at the front gate.

Not noticing that Xu Shu had stopped in his tracks, Ujiyasu continued his pace and kept talking, “Why no? When you grow up you need to learn how to cheat your way out of li- Huh?”

A small thud signaled him that he had accidentally hit somebody. His vision met with a familiar looking staff, and suddenly a feeling as if Bodhisattva’s fist was plunging towards his head struck within him. Nervously and slowly, Ujiyasu turned his head down to see the owner of the staff; staring at him with cold and emotionless eyes that didn’t match the seemingly pleasant smile she had on her face.

“Y-Yo…” The warlord gave a hand wave to the petite woman in front of him. “I just payed my contributions to your temple, so let me just take my lea- Guh!”

The woman’s hand grabbed Ujiyasu’s ear in a flash and pulled him down to her height. As the force of her pull gravitated the Warlord down, he winced repeatedly in reaction.

“L-Lord Ujiyasu, M-Mistress Aya is here…” said Xu Shu slowly.

“O-Ow… You think I can’t see that? O-Owww…”

“My, so you actually think you can get away by just giving me a pocket change?” There was low growl resonating along with Aya’s voice.

“Of course not… I’m an honest guy, so of course I gave what I had to give.” said Ujiyasu while trying to toughen himself up against the increasingly excruciating pain in his ear, as Aya began to twist it.

“Is that so? Let’s see what your disciple would have to say about that.”

Hearing that she mentioned his name, the hair on Xu Shu’s skin instantly raised along with a chill passing by him, and he ultimately flinched when her sights were set towards him. “Hii-A-Ah… T-That…”

Sweat rained drastically on his face as Xu Shu stammered for a response. However, taking notice of that, Aya said, “I see… You really are honest.”

“Oh? You really think so?” Ujiyasu responded to Aya, eyes a bit widened in pleasant surprise. “Then you don’t mind if I- Gaaah…!”

Aya pulled Ujiyasu along as she walked towards the donation box at the temple complex’s furthest end. “Of course I don’t mean you. I heard what you said about cheating in life.”

“A-Ah…”

Xu Shu was at lost on what to do, as he gulped his speech seeing Aya dragging his master by his ear back to the donation box before finally following the two. Visitors seeing the grand priestess dragging a large man, that they were quite sure he was the one that yelled loudly quite some time ago, made way hastily.

When they arrived, Aya opened the box to reveal the only one coin that Ujiyasu had thrown in there. “There’s only one coin in the Ujiyasu box.”

“Ujiyasu box…?” Xu Shu blankly asked.

Aya turned around to Xu Shu while putting the coin in her robe’s sleeve. “Oh yes, seeing that you’re new here. You see-.”

“I already told him.” cut in Ujiyasu.

“Oh? So you actually taught him something. Well then I suppose I’ll skip that part,” She whispered something to Ujiyasu’s ear which was met with a repeated hand wave from the Warlord, as if he knew what he was supposed to do. After seeing him leave to the back of the temple’s shrine building, Aya approached Xu Shu and said, “We actually have separate boxes for actual donations and his contributions.”

“I-I see…” After regaining some sense on what was going on, he continued, “Please do not be offended, but… Ujiyasu box?”

Aya chuckled in response and said, “I am not offended at all, young one. But yes that’s right, that’s the Ujiyasu box,” The two walked towards the box. “I know what you’re thinking: that’s a cute name.” She put one of her hand on her cheek, as her cheeks started to lightly blush and her eyes became a bit brighter.

Seeing no signs of her words as a joke, Xu Shu just silently nodded, fearing for his life if he said one thing out of line.

“But for every cute naming sense, there is always a hidden backstory.” The priestess’ tone turned serious yet again as she opened the box and taking the one coin piece of offering that Ujiyasu had left.

“What do you mean by that?” Xu Shu asked worryingly, ignoring the cute naming sense part of the conversation.

Aya took a small, silent breath as she began to recount a memory in her head.

“Let me tell you more from this morning...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be patient as Aya tries to clearly recount the whole story in the next chapter.


	7. Now here you are, being fidgety and whatnot. Why don’t you just go to the bathroom now before you regret it? That was seriously one bad yogurt…

_It was the dead of winter. The chilling, harsh winds of the season ravaged throughout the land as small bits of snow ungracefully dropped alongside the harsh downpour. Life had been seemingly taken away by the season as it was waiting for the warmth of spring it yearned for._

_It was two or so years after the humans, with help of the mystics, triumphed over the demons, and words of mystics creating government spread out and about. As the damage of the long war was still apparent throughout the world, Aya had volunteered to help alleviate the people’s trauma and traveled the land, despite the harsh weather._

_“I must bid you farewell, for there are others that still need our help.”_

_Carrying her staff and an umbrella on the other hand, she parted with a small village with her gentle smile, as the village children waved back to her from the distance under their family’s umbrellas._

_Carrying a demeanor that gave an impression of safety under her protection, she ventured forth towards her next destination._

_Her thoughts on her way towards the next war-torn village were the aftermath of the war and how everything was going to change for good or worse. One particular thought was the clan that ruled Odawara, an area which was decreed by the newly established mystic government to be one of the mystics’ central hub of activity. That clan was the now vanished Hojo._

_Aya knew of the clan to some extent when it still existed, in actuality she personally knew the man who ruled there and his family. Last time she heard about him was that he disappeared, never to be heard of again._

_As she was deep in her recollection, her eyes met with a man in tatters in the middle of the road. His hair was an unkempt, chaotic mess, his robe was torn badly, revealing bruises, cuts and wounds all over his worn-out body, and the man struggled to even try to limp as he tried to drag his body in the middle of the heavy, cold rain._

_Sympathizing with his agony, Aya approached the man, preparing to lend him her help. Closing in on him from the back, a sense of familiarity hit her. She extended her umbrella to the man in tatters._

_The rain had stopped dropping on top of his head, yet drops of water still continued to fall to the ground around him._

_“What are you doing here?”_

_Aya’s gentle voice reached his ears, making him stop his futile dragging to his unplanned destination. Processing the voice in his head, he remembered whose voice called out to him. He, however, kept silent, looking away from her position._

_Figuring that she would not receive a proper response soon, she crouched down to her knees and leaned closer to him. “Why are you here?”_

_The question of ‘why’ felt like it pierced into his body, as he slightly flinched in reaction._

_“….ed” His faint voice was nearly drowned by the sound of raindrops crashing to the ground._

_Aya gently leaned her right ear closer to him, and begged him to repeat._

_“I’m…. tired….” He said. A slight choke was caught on his throat. “I… want to…. go back home….” He took breaths to swallow the choke that almost overwhelmed his throat and chest. He bit his lip, slightly whimpering, as he turned around to face Aya, who had been patiently waiting for him to open up. “I want to return home to Odawara…!”_

_The word home was all Aya needed to hear from him. She smiled at him and gently lifted him up from the ground._

_“Haha… No need to worry, Ujiyasu. Just follow me.”_

_“Y-you…” He stuttered in surprise._

_“I’m sure you went through a lot. It matters not to me what you did out there, I will help you heal the wounds you have.”_

_Aya’s words soothed him. However, a memory flashed before him, jolting him away from the comfortable feeling. “O-Odawara is…!”_

_“It’s okay,” She gently patted his shoulders to calm him down. “Odawara is safe and sound. Everything is exactly like the way it is before you left, I assure you.”_

_“O-Oh….” He was about to ask further questions, but Aya continued,_

_“I’m sure you are hungry and tired. Come. We shall return to Odawara – your castle, your home. I will make sure all of it.”_

_With a weak but sure nod, he put his faith and trust to her. She took his arm and wrapped it across her shoulders. The two walked back to Odawara in the cold winter rain, with him slouching from his wounds and hunger along the way, while Aya delicately lead him back to the place that was his home._


	8. Is the yogurt kicking in? Yeah, I thought so…. Next time, pack yourself toasts for breakfast.

“L-Lord Ujiyasu was found outside the castle town?!” Aya’s recount of her memory regarding that day surprised Xu Shu.

“Yes.” She nodded. “All battered up and desperate to even stand on his own feet.”

Xu Shu felt a deep sympathy for his new lord. He never expected that a Warlord would be found helpless and discarded on roads. According to Xu Shu, Warlords were figures that were celebrated for their bravery during the long struggle between humans and demons long ago. Although Xu Shu began to have doubts about his master due to his rude and lazy personality not matching with his ideal image of a Warlord, Aya’s story made him realized that Ujiyasu had struggled to survive in the world – similar to how Xu Shu himself and his mistress, Oichi, struggled to live on after the incident at Odani.

Xu Shu walked towards the Ujiyasu box and absent-mindedly examined it. “But then what does this dona- I mean ‘Ujiyasu box’ supposed to mean then? I don’t get the connection…”

Hearing again his question regarding the special donation box, Aya laughed teasingly. “Haha… Ujiyasu already told you about the castle, did he not?”

“Y-Yes… He did…”

“Isn’t it obvious then?”

“A-Ah… No…” He sheepishly answered her question.

“My, I must always repeat myself - You sure are very honest yet quite a greenhorn in life. Ujiyasu is lucky to have found a pure student – in a sense- such as you,” The priestess softly laughed at her own discernment regarding Xu Shu again. Nervous on what would happen if he did not laugh with her as with previous times, he forced himself to laugh lightly. “Nothing is for free in this world, and someone as lazy as your master knows that, so I forced him to a quota of contributions, so to say, for every month or get out. Besides, my salary as a temple priestess isn’t enough to make a living. Cheap bastards…” She uncharacteristically muttered her last line, while clenching her fist and narrowing her eyes in annoyance.

The sweats from Xu Shu’s foreheads dropped more intensively after noticing a chilling aura from her last remark. “U-Um… Mistress Aya, ah… s-surely is a hard-worker for both the temple and Odawara… Hahaha…” He quickly tried to change the topic back regarding the name of the box. “B-But your story hasn’t answered my question about the box’s name…”

“Ah, I trailed off…” The aura around her dissipated. “I thought it was clear from what I just said, but why its name is the Ujiyasu box is-.”

“Kyaaaa!!!”

Aya’s answer was cut short by a sudden screech of woman from the temple grounds. The crowds dispersed, revealing a large gang of rogue demons, armed with swords and spears- with a demon with an unkempt, tied ponytail, carrying a huge spear acting as the leader.

“V-Violent rogue demons are here!!” cried someone from the panicking crowd.

“D-Demons! What are they doing here?!” wondered aloud Xu Shu hysterically. He turned to Aya who still kept her calm composure. “Mistress Aya, we have to do something!”

Aya, however, only extended her in front of Xu Shu, signaling him to stand back. “Do not take action just yet. We shall first hear what they want.” She calmly said.

The demons slowly marched towards the temple grounds. Frightened onlookers froze in their positions, trying not to entice the demons to attack them. But the air around the temple grew heavy and the occasional leers from the demons to an onlooker made it hard for anyone trapped in the situation to keep their composure.

When the group of demons reached the center of the temple ground, the leader shouted in a coarse voice, “We’re holding you folks hostage until we get our share of this temple’s money!”

Aya took a breath after hearing the demon’s petty wish. “Just as I thought.”

“Mistress Aya…” Xu Shu worriedly looked at the scared visitors.

“Now, where’s the head priest or monk or whatever leads this joint?! I need to talk to him about our share!”

Xu Shu wanted to step in and help, but Aya’s restraint and remembering what happened to him on the market square the other day casted doubt on his own ability to actually save anyone during this time. Then, he remembered that his lord was still somewhere around temple ground.

“Where’s Lord Ujiyasu?” He scanned around the temple ground, looking for the tall man in black and red attire. When his eyes found the person he was looking for, he called, almost shouting, “L-Lord Ujiyasu! Please get - huh?” He noticed Ujiyasu was raking leaves amidst the crowd, not looking at what was going on around him.

“God damn these leaves! Come on! Stick to the rake! Don’t…. Gah…!” Ujiyasu impatiently tried to gather the leaves with the rusty rake he had on his hand, making the leaves spread further. When he finally managed to gather the leaves into a small pile he had accumulated at one point, he brushed the sweat on his face, putting the rake on his shoulders, while smiling to himself for a job done. “Hah! Leaves are still leaves even if they are scattered in a group. Take that you guys!” Ujiyasu turned back to point and laugh at the pile of leaves he had gathered, only to notice that they spread all over again.

“ARRRRGGGGHHH!!!! YOU GOTTA BE SHITTING ME!!!”

The Warlord threw a huge tantrum, as he maniacally tried to gather up the leaves in a pile again, while shouting curse words that caused mothers in the area to gasp and shield their children’s ear. Everyone’s attention was now directed to the loudly cussing, ground-stomping, definitely in many ways irritated Warlord, with an onlooker passing comments on what they saw.

“W-Who is that guy?”

“I dunno… Judging from his tantrum, I can say he’s someone that got dragged out from his parent’s basement to do his chores.”

Somehow, managing to overhear the conversation between two onlookers, Xu Shu could not help but feel embarrassed, with his face turning red and nervously chuckle on his own. Aya was amused by Ujiyasu’s temper, smiling as she saw him slowly gathering the leaves back again.

“There! Finally gotcha all! All 151 of them!” He enthusiastically declared.

“P***mon?!” shouted Xu Shu from the box’s location.

Ujiyasu rested the rake on his shoulders again, not noticing the whole pile was stuck on the rake. Xu Shu sighed before saying to his master, “My lord, look behind you…”

Ujiyasu looked back at his rake to notice the pile, just as a strong wind blew it all away. Cold sweat flowed from every human present in the temple complex and silence followed soon after.

“Yeah you know what? I’m so done with you. Nope. I ain’t gonna do it again. If that’s how you want it then…” Ujiyasu talked to nobody particular, while slowly walking away from the yet again spread leaves. Suddenly, he turned back into the leaves and angrily tried to rake them all, while shouting, “YOU THOUGHT I’M GONNA GIVE UP THAT EASILY?! THINK AGAIN, YOU IDIOTS!!” Lifting his rake over his head and preparing to plunge forward, he shouted, “OUGI!! BLAZING RAKE OF THE-!!”

“RATHER THAN THAT, LOOK AROUND YOU, YOU DUNCE!! There are demons attacking the temple!” shouted Xu Shu towards his lord.

“Oro?” Ujiyasu turned around to see the pack of demons already ganging up behind him. “What’s this? What do you snakes want huh?” He put the rake back to his shoulders as he confronted them.

The demon gang leader walked towards Ujiyasu with a sly smile, as his underlings began to encircle the two while laughing tauntingly. “So you’re the leader of this shoddy place eh? Hehe…”

Hearing the word shoddy to refer to the temple caused a click within Ujiyasu’s head. “What makes you morons think that? Do I look like the type that can recite sutras?”

“Come on, don’t lie to us! We know you’re in charge here!” One of the henchmen taunted.

“Did you not hear me swearing my ass off? No temple priest is that foul mouthed, you idiots,” Ujiyasu nonchalantly shoved the demon gang leader to the side, and then getting ready to rake the temple grounds again. “Now if you still wanna find the temple priestess, go ask someone else. I’m too busy to help low life demons like you.”

“Low life demon?! How dare you refer to our boss like that!” One of the demon henchmen started to charge towards Ujiyasu.

Seeing the demon running fast towards his master, Xu Shu shouted at him, “Lord Ujiyasu, he’s charging right behind you!”

Just when the demon was about to swing his sword to slice Ujiyasu’s back, the Warlord turned around and blocked the sword in a blink with the rake’s wooden handle.

“W-What?!” shouted the dumbfounded henchman.

Ujiyasu circled the sword in the air with his rake, parrying the sword and ultimately causing the demon to stumble to the side. Taking advantage of the situation, he whacked the demon by the shoulder with the blunt end of the rake, letting the demon writhing in pain and drop his sword. Quickly, Ujiyasu took the demon’s sword from the ground and slashed the demon’s arm, and with a scream from the demon, he rendered him unable to fight any longer.

Humans and demons present held their breath at Ujiyasu’s self-defense - especially the Warlord’s student, Xu Shu, even though he already witnessed him battle before.

_H-He could easily turn the situation around like that…_ Xu Shu thought to himself, _And with a rusty old rake too… Ah, wait… I just realized he’s not using his weapon._

“You! You’re not getting away with this! Get him boys!” Enraged, the demon leader ordered his minions to attack Ujiyasu.

“Tsk… So reckless…” The Warlord muttered under his breath as he braced himself with the rake to face the demons.

Seeing that a full assault was happening, the temple visitors hurriedly made their escape to safety. Noticing that they were all out of reach, the demon leader hastily ordered to focus only on Ujiyasu. The demon gang’s number was quite big for a troublemaking gang - including the leader their numbers reach ten at the least.

Two demons raced at Ujiyasu with their sword and spear, with more following behind. He focused his attention towards the spear wielding one as he set the rake’s metal to the side where that demon would try to stab him, and making the blunt wooden handle facing the other demon’s spot. And just as he predicted, the spear wielder leapt on his left and the other one from the right.

“Gotcha…” The Warlord smirked.

Somehow managing to catch the spear among the small gaps of the metal rake and pushed the spear down to the ground, Ujiyasu used that as a stable support for him to block the sword wielder’s blow. “Hah!” The Warlord taunted, “This is what you get for getting cocky, you moron!” He parried the sword away, flinging it far off from the wielder. With the rake’s handle facing upward, Ujiyasu spun around it, using it as a pole, with his legs extended; kicking the sword wielder harshly towards would be attackers behind, knocking them out.

“That takes care of those guys. And now…”

Reaching the top of the makeshift pole, his spinning twisted the rake, forcing the spear wielder to let go of his weapon in reflex. Before the spear wielder realized, Ujiyasu was already above him with the blunt end of the rake aiming at spear wielder’s forehead.

**_WHAM!!_ **

And with an audible whack, Ujiyasu knocked out another demon. However, he looked at this current weapon and noticed that metal is almost completely broken from the twist and the wooden handle showed signs of worn out. “Urgh… Just my luck…” He cursed to himself.

_This isn’t good…! That rake won’t last long..._ Xu Shu looked at Aya who also showed concern as her eyes narrowed to Ujiyasu’s current weapon.

“Mistress Aya…”

“That rake is going to brake. It cost me quite a bit when I first got it. Ujiyasu would have to replace that soon.”

“Yes, the rake does look like it went through years of - Wait, that’s not it! Mistress Aya, we should worry more about Lord Ujiyasu! I don’t think he’s going to last long with that!” Xu Shu looked back at the battle. “He’s at a disadvantage, yet he doesn’t look like he’s going to back down…”

“Haha… That answers your previous question about the box.” said Aya.

“Huh?”

“You see, your master is the type that stays true to his beliefs - A person that shows his desire to help others through concrete action. That box, you see, is not just a mere monthly contribution box, but also a measure to keep track of his big picture – to remind him of his personal drive.”

“I-Is that so…?”

“However, when he does take action, he could be so reckless in his personal pursuit that he earned the scars he has, like what he is doing now. That is why we named it Ujiyasu box – as an akin to the scars he has on his body.”

“Ha….!”

Xu Shu had learned something new regarding his lord - Something that caused him to see Ujiyasu in a different light, putting little weight of his rudeness and laziness. Then he remembered in the back of his head when Aya mentioned Ujiyasu’s concrete action.

_That’s right… If it wasn’t for Lord Ujiyasu’s actions, I wouldn’t be here right now with Lady Oichi. I’ve got to stay true to my own judgement! I will help my lord in a way I can!_

Xu Shu was about to ask Aya the whereabouts of Ujiyasu’s weapon, but as if already reading his mind, she said, “His cane is in the backroom of this shrine. I always tell him to put it there. Go get it now, young one.”

“Yes!” with a confident nod and answer, Xu Shu rushed to retrieve the cane.

On the temple ground, Ujiyasu had managed to defeat the henchmen of the demon gang with the rusty rake, leaving only the large spear wielding leader left. However, the demon leader showed no sign of fear as he confidently, yet angrily, stepped in to fight against Ujiyasu.

“Grr… You sure are a handful for a mere human! But this is where you get off! Your ‘weapon’ doesn’t look like it’ll help you anymore either!”

Ujiyasu did realize the rake had already reached its limit. It looked like with just a single swing from the enemy, it would break completely. And with a large spear like the demon leader’s, the rake would surely break like a thin twig.

_Crap, if only I have my cane right now…_

Keeping a front of confidence to ensure the temple visitors that he had the situation under control, Ujiyasu braced himself to drive off the final demon. With a coarse shout, the demon charged while violently thrusting his spear towards Ujiyasu. Knowing he could not hope to block it with his current rake, Ujiyasu hastily rolled away.

_There’s no way I can hold any of this demon’s attack with this! I can’t go run and get my cane now either. It looks like I have to play keep away with this one until something comes up._

Just as he finished his thought, the demon came back and thrusted his spear to the ground, where Ujiyasu was. The Warlord narrowly dodged the attack by quickly stepping back, causing the spear to hit the ground, planting it.

“Rrrgh...! You little…!” The demon forced himself to try to pry his weapon off from the ground.

Taking another of his chance, Ujiyasu scanned around the temple ground for an opportunity to strike without using the rake. _This one’s just swinging his weapons wildly. I gotta think of something fast!_ His eyes reached the scattered leaves he had tried to pile up earlier. _Huh, I never thought I let those bastards of leaves help me out of this situation… is what I would say if only…_

“My lord!” Xu Shu’s voice reached the Warlord’s ear.

“Xu Shu?! What are you doing running all the way here?! Huh?” Then, Ujiyasu noticed his familiar cane on Xu Shu’s hand, as he was flailing it towards his master. “You…”

“Forgive me for throwing this at you…” Xu Shu directed his arm that held the cane towards Ujiyasu. “Please catch it…!” Throwing the cane as hard as he can, Xu Shu yelled out, closing his eyes and prayed that it could reach his master’s hands without missing.

Xu Shu’s prayer was answered as Ujiyasu caught his weapon with his left hand. The Warlord’s student slowly opened his eyes while recovering from his throw, only to see his master smiled at him, while holding the cane up, as if assuring that Xu Shu had done well to help him. “I… I did it…!”

Having his weapon back in his hand, Ujiyasu quickly combined his cane and the rake, making it thicker, with the rake on the outer layer of the combined weapons. By the time he finished, the demon had pried his spear and faced Ujiyasu again.

“Haha! Were you just standing there the whole time?” taunted the demon, who was apparently too focused on his weapon to notice Xu Shu had shouted and thrown Ujiyasu’s weapon back. Ujiyasu glanced back towards the scattered leaves, prompting the demon to taunt further, “Looks like you ran out of ideas.” With another harsh shout, the demon wildly slashed his large spear towards Ujiyasu.

He dodged the slash while heading towards the leaves. “You thought so, eh? Well, at least two can play at the game of swinging your weapon like an idiot.” Using his rake, Ujiyasu picked up the leaves and swung it at the demon. “Ora ora ora ora….!!!” shouted the Warlord at every swing.

“L-Leaves?!” shouted Xu Shu from the sidelines, “I don’t get it but that’s just a bit juvenile! And what’s with that battle cry?!”

The demon swatted away the leaves thrown at him. “Hah! That’s your trick?” The demon kept swatting away the leaves while slowly closing in on Ujiyasu.

Xu Shu noticed that his lord was about to be cornered. “Oh no… he can’t keep this up forever!” When Ujiyasu reached the dead end, where there were no more leaves to be thrown at, the demon yelled out, swinging his large spear over his head towards the Warlord. Seeing this, Xu Shu reflexively ran towards his lord despite knowing he would not reach in time, shouting, “Lord Ujiyasu!”

**_CRACK_ **

The sound of a wooden handle split into two echoed throughout the temple yard. Every onlooker, especially Xu Shu, gasped, hoping the worst did not happen.

“N-No way!” uttered the demon.

The rake was broken from the attack, but the cane hidden on the inner layer of the combined weapon remained intact and blocked the blow of the demon’s weapon.

“Heh, you don’t know who you’re dealing with here.” said Ujiyasu.

The demon noticed a three triangle insignia on the cane. His eyes widened in horror, realizing who his opponent this whole time was.

Opening the sheath of the cane, revealing the sword underneath it, Ujiyasu jumped and sliced the demon’s spear in half, while launching himself to the air. As he plummeted back to earth, Ujiyasu put back his sword inside the cane, aiming the blunt edge towards the demon’s face, yelling, “This is for saying something in Odawara shoddy, you idiot!”

“Ooohhhh….!”

The cane landed directly on the demon’s mouth, knocking him out instantly. Landing safely back to the ground, Ujiyasu noticed the saliva sticking. “Ah Great… Snake drool… I don’t need to see that.”

The crowd wildly cheered for Ujiyasu’s victory over the demon thugs, somewhat startling Ujiyasu back from his complaint on the saliva on his cane. Xu Shu ran towards his master, happy that he saved the temple and relieved that he made it out in one piece.

“My lord…!”

“Oi oi… don’t look at me with those eyes… It’s creeping me out.”

“A-Ahaha… but you saved everyone here today! I’m amazed yet again at your heroism!”

“Tsk... it was just lowlife thugs…”

Aya appeared right before the two, clapping her hands and smiling proudly. “Haha… You have taught your student here very well, Ujiyasu. I’m sure he learned a lot from what he saw today.”

“Hey, don’t force him to learn. It’s up to him if he wants to pick something to memorize then forget about it the next day.”

“Ah… Ahaha… Of course I won’t forget, my lord,” sheepishly said Xu Shu, “Everyone here is grateful for what you did, my lord. I’m sure nobody will forget about this day.”

“Haa…” The Warlord took out a long breath, scratching his head, before facing Aya and said, “Well, I didn’t manage to clean up the temple yard as punishment for being sneaky. So I guess I’ll just get ready to wear that chicken costume, huh?”

“C-Chicken costume?” said Xu Shu in shock.

A groan was heard from one of the demon henchman. The three turned their heads to the demon who was about to get up, and Aya suddenly came up with a plan. “That won’t be necessary, as much as I want to see it. Looks like your debt can be paid sooner, Ujiyasu.”

“Oh, here goes… You could’ve done this sooner, you know that? Come on Xu Shu, we’ll back off for a bit.” Ujiyasu gestured his hand at Xu Shu to follow him.

“Eh? But the demon is…”

“Nah… She’ll be fine. Just watch.”

The demon henchman slowly got up from the ground while rubbing his forehead to get a clear vision. When his sights returned, the white priestess was already standing in front of him with her praying staff in hand.

“Thank goodness you’re finally awake,” She said calmly. The demon was startled at Aya’s figure and her speech, despite that she showed no physical signs of malevolence. Yet.

“Oh, why so surprised? I heard you wanted to meet the leader of this temple so here I am.” Aya smiled at the demon while intensifying her gaze at him.

“H-Hihihi…!”

“But look at what you did to my temple… It’s a mess. What to do you intend to do to fix it?”

“A-Ah…”

“Haha… How.do you.intend.to fix it?” Then her frightening aura gushed out of her instantly, silencing everyone around.

“Eeheehee….! We’re sorry! Please! We repent! Take all of the treasures we stole! We promise not to do it again! Just don’t hurt me…”

With the demon apologizing and offering Aya all of his gang’s money, the aura around her quickly dissipated again. “That’s a good snake demon…” She petted him on the head.

Watching from the sides, Xu Shu opened his mouth in disbelief at how easy Aya convinced a demon thug with just her presence. He nervously turned to Ujiyasu, who shakenly tried to light up his pipe. “M-My lord… J-just what is Mistress Aya? I-Is she human? I could’ve sworn something…. frightening…. came out of her….”

“Y-You saw what she did in the castle, right? J-just don’t do anything bad and you’ll be fine… Also Xu Shu, don’t let your mistress meet her, got that?”

* * *

 

When the sun set, the demon gang had already retreated, leaving heaps of treasure into the temple’s donation box. Ujiyasu and Xu Shu had also finished raking the temple yard using the snapped rusty rake Ujiyasu had used earlier. Somehow.

“Ahh… I’m done for the day,” Ujiyasu stretched his right arm while also adjusting his neck. Resting his cane onto his shoulder, he walked away from the temple gate while holding his free hand up in the air, and said, “Well, I guess I’ll see you some time soon.”

“Haha… don’t forget it you still owe me for the Ujiyasu box with your own money, Ujiyasu.” said Aya.

“Hah… Yeah, I’ll figure something out. See ya.” The Warlord curtly walked away, returning home to his castle.

“A-Ah wait for me Lord Ujiyasu!” pleaded Xu Shu.

“Oh one more thing for you, Xu Shu,” Aya’s voice called him out. “Be faithful in your judgement, understand? Also, appeal to your master’s sophomoric ideas. He doesn’t admit it, but he will be happy if someone pays attention to his imagination.”

“Oh? Uh… Yes of course, mistress! Thank you for your words!” Xu Shu bowed deeply at Aya before departing back to his master’s side.

On their way back to Odawara castle, Xu Shu looked at his master, who kept the scowl he had before they started their day. _He looks, acts and is a Warlord, yet not… A strange man indeed. However, judging from all that he did to us, Mistress Aya is right about his unquestionable good side. That means I picked the right master after all._

“What? Quit staring at me like that, you idiot… You’ve been doing it quite a lot today.” Ujiyasu quipped, bringing Xu Shu back from his thoughts.

“Ah, forgive me… I didn’t mean to be awkward,” Xu Shu nervously scratched his head. “But Lord Ujiyasu, today you shouted something. Something like, ‘Ougi! Blazing Rake of-’ something?”

Ujiyasu widened his eyes. He was pleasantly surprised Xu Shu had just mentioned an idea the Warlord had in his head. It was not much, but it made Ujiyasu slightly more comfortable to be more open with his thoughts to his student.

“You idiot… You’re a hundred years too early to know that…” He blew a smoke from his pipe.

“Eh? But I really feel it was going to be something amazing if it wasn’t for those demons. Please tell me!”

“Alright, alright! Since you’re such an eager student… Ya see, Blazing Rake of the-”

And so from that day, Xu Shu understood the world around him better, and in addition started to know a thing or two about raking the yard with extreme passion; Something Oichi noticed when he did the chores at their new home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't mess with gardening tools is the true lesson of the story here. Especially if it's wielded by an original generation enthusiast Warlord.


	9. Remember to look on both side of the road when you’re about to cross. Don’t rely on the magic hand! It won’t work!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's been a lot of disturbance in the dimensional realm lately! And the doer is a seemingly harmless girl with an iron rod and balls?! What will she do next?!

**_WHACK!! WHACK!! THUD!!_ **

In a small village, a large band of miscreants had terrorized a village. With the village’s finest fighters knocked out by the members of the miscreant group, there seemed to be nothing that could stop them from plundering the village afterwards. Cornering the villagers into a corner, the greasy haired, pimpled forehead, miscreant leader boastfully said, “This is all you’ve got to offer? Ha! And we haven’t gotten out our trump card yet!”

The villagers cowered in fear of this trump card that the miscreant leader mentioned. That and his odor was unbearable to their nose. It was a combination of putrid cheese and dried fish skin left on the trash bin for a week.

“Guan Yinping!” The miscreant leader shouted in a slight sing-song way.

The villagers heard ‘Guan’ in the figure he just called. That name rang familiar within the villager’s ears, and caused fear.

“Yes!” A figure of a petite girl in green vest and red short-skirt leaped high from the crowd of the miscreants. Her hip-reaching long, silky, flower-decorated hair flowed gracefully as she landed. “Guan Yinping is here!” She declared her arrival with a playful, childish tone as she posed with her hands in the air and winked.

The villagers could not believe their eyes. This petite girl was carrying with one hand what seemed to be her weapon; a large metal rod with two giant pair of iron balls attached on each end. It seemed too heavy for anyone, especially someone of her stature, to even carry.

“Sh-She’s…” One of the villager stammered, “She’s got ba-!”

“No, I’m Guan Yinping! I just told you!” The girl protested.

“Right, now that you’re here, finish them off! Everyone, we’ll plunder this place clean!” The miscreant leader declared, followed by a loud cheer, mixed with coughing because of the miscreant leader raising his arm, from his followers.

“Wait, hold on!” she cut off the cheers. “I thought we were training these people to be stronger for bandit attacks. Are you saying that we’re going to plunder? As in… we’re the bandits?”

“Well, yeah… That’s what miscreants do.”

She shook her head in disappointment while pouting. “No, that’s just wrong! If you’re going to keep doing this then I quit!” She turned around to the villagers and gestured at them to return back to their homes.

“I’m sorry everyone… I promise this won’t happen again.”

* * *

 

“Flight number AKR 06 has just landed.”

The voice of a soft spoken woman echoed across Odawara’s main blimp terminal as a large grey blimp safely docked into the platforms. As the voice from the PA repeated its announcement, passengers prepared to get off in large crowds from the recently arrived blimp and the terminal’s crew prepared to unload the baggage from it. The blimp’s door opened… and the girl with a metal rod dramatically punched off the blimp’s baggage compartment door, shaking the blimp, startling the passengers. Crew members shrieked and backed away when they saw a petite girl carrying a large barbell-like object coming their way.

“Hey, why’s everyone screaming? Isn’t this the exit for people with no ticket?” She wondered out loud, “Still… quitting from a gang sure was hard… Those people were persistent on keeping me there…”

She walked out of the terminal, ignoring whispers, gasps and judging stares on what she was holding as she opened her mouth in amazement at the huge, complex terminal with crowds bustling back and forth, whether they were passengers or crews.

“Wow! The capital sure is different! People here aren’t too tan! Still, I heard air pollution is awful at places like this – I mean, people have been gasping for air wherever I go in here.”

She exited the large blimp terminal and left it behind her. Her eyes met tall buildings and a large crowd of people went here and there as soon as she stepped out of the terminal. The reflection on her eyes brightened as she giddily skipped around, whilst unwittingly swinging around her large rod with one hand. The crowd dispersed immediately as soon they realized a loud whoosh was heard along with a strong gust from the girl’s swing.

“Wahaha…! The atmosphere here sure is different!”

“GAH!” An iron ball from her rod accidentally, yet non-fatally, hit a man.

“And the people sure are lively with their ‘GAH!’” She imitated a grunt she just heard with a forced guttural, low-pitch voice.

Then, in the middle of her excitement, she caught glimpse of a pale-skinned demon walking among the crowds. She gasped and immediately braced herself to attack the demon. “Hey wait!” She lowered her stance as soon as she saw a mystical hermit floating above the demon.

She silently looked at the people around the two beings that did not seem to be disturbed or cared about the unusual sighting.

“Hey master, I want candy! Gimme candy!” The demon said to the hermit.

“No! You’re already 18! You’re too old for candy! Besides that candy is mine…”

“But you’re 80 – plus!” retorted the demon disciple.

“Oh alright… It’s only because of that cheap shot from you, young one.”

Overhearing the conversation, an old woman stepped out from her small store and gave, with a warm smile, the two beings sweet confectioneries she claimed she just made. The three people laughed together before parting ways back to their own activities.

The girl watched the whole scene from her position and was amazed as her face glittered up, and her mouth opened with a big smile.

“Wow! Did you see that?!” She excitedly pointed at front of her while jumping giddily, unwittingly shaking the earth with her iron ball coming in contact with the ground, causing some people around her to run away in fear from the mini-quake. “Mystic, human and demon helping each other and laughing together! That is just… WOW!!! I can’t believe I just saw that with my own eyes!”

“O-Of course… This is Odawara, miss,” A man among the crowd slowly spoke to her, “This is one of the hubs that the Mystic Government set for peaceful coexistence among all beings in this world.”

“Peaceful coexistence? Odawara?” The slightly shaken man nodded to the cheery-eyed girl’s question. “YES!! I found it! I finally found the perfect place for me to reach my dreams!” She thrusted both of her hands in the air victoriously, as people began to question her sanity.

“Now tell me! Who’s in charge of this place?” Before the man could answer her question, the girl saw a castle on the horizon. “Oh, that must be it! That castle over there is where the person in charge of this city will be, right?”

“Wait, miss. Odawara castle is-.” The girl had already ran, leaving trails and after-image from the winds she made from her blinding speed, despite the weight of her rod and irons.

“OH, I ALMOST FORGOT – THANK YOU MISTER!!” Her voice loudly echoed throughout the city.

“Y-You’re welcome…?”

* * *

 

“Umm… My lord…”

“What?”

“I know you wanted to have someone to help you with repairing the roof of the castle’s front gate…”

“Yeah. And?”

“THEN GET UP FROM THE ROOF AND FIX IT WITH ME!! STOP SMOKING AND PLAYING ON YOUR VRD MORT!”

Ujiyasu lazily got up onto a sitting position. With his eyes and hands still fixed on the handheld screen, he spat the pipe to his side. Mindlessly mashing the buttons on his controller with his tongue sticking out, while intensively, with a needless hawk eye, stare at the screen, he said, “Come on... Just one more combo and… HAAA!!!”

He, with a needless hearty shout, pressed the finishing button for the game he was playing. Finishing off the boss, Ujiyasu excitedly raised his arms up to the air in victory. Needlessly.

“Woooo!!! HUEHEHEHE!! You moron! Come back when you have skills!” He taunted the screen whilst curling a sly smile.

“YOU’RE A MORON!!! COME BACK PLAYING THE GAME WHEN YOU’VE FINISHED WORKING ON FIXING THE GATE!!”

“Ha?! What was that?!” The Warlord angrily pulled the controller to his face, intensely glaring at it.

“MY LORD!! I WAS THE ONE TALKING!” Xu Shu impatiently stomped his foot onto the roof where the two men were on, bringing Ujiyasu’s attention back to reality.

“Huh? So it was you, Xu Shu? Why so angry this early in the day?”

“Please don’t pretend you don’t know…” Xu Shu took a deep breath to regain his patience before continuing, “My lord, we agreed to fix the crumbling gate of the castle a while ago. Please be more serious about it as it won’t fix on its own…”

“What? Your lord is being serious. I mean I got materials needed to upgrade the castle gate by beating the previous bo-.”

“Stick to real life and not the VRD Mort please!”

“You idiot! You don’t diss on Virtually Real Dream Mort like that! It’s one of the most capable handheld there is to bring things to life! You don’t spell it v, r, d, you say it vord. Also you pronounce the Mort with a silent T!” Ujiyasu angrily lectured to Xu Shu, before roughly shoving the handheld to his disciple’s face. “Now apologize to it!”

“What?!”

“Apologize to this thing for not believing its capabilities! And while you’re at it,” Ujiyasu picked up the pipe he spat out just a while ago, and then roughly shoved it to Xu Shu. “Apologize to my pipe too! You made it feel left behind by making me spit it out!”

“As if I’d do that!” Xu Shu argued, “It’s just an inanimate object, my lord!”

Widening his eyes in shock, Ujiyasu gasped dramatically as if someone shot a puppy in front of his eyes. He regained his previous angry persona and shouted, “Don’t say that in front of them, you moron! Pipes and handhelds have feelings too!”

The two men, teacher and student, bickered and shouted at each other for another umpteenth time ever since the student entered his teacher’s wings; this time on Odawara castle’s gate’s roof. Xu Shu had learned from Aya and then saw for himself of his master’s rather wild imagination. A few weeks ago, he discovered with his own eyes on how his master probably got his imagination from; the game console he was playing on to distract himself from fixing the castle gate’s roof. Xu Shu always tried to be accepting of his master’s ‘creativity’, but he could never help but to ground him when something more important came to them – such as fixing the castle gate’s roof.

The argument and ensuing small fight between the two ended up rumbling the roof, damaging it worse than how it started.

“Hah! Got you now, you little brat! Now say you’re sorry!”

“Wait, my lord! This all seem familiar…”

Realizing that Ujiyasu had Xu Shu by the collar, he remembered.

“YOU BASTARD!!! LET GO OF XU SHU RIGHT.NOW!!!!!”

Ujiyasu just remembered with that shrill, overbearing scream that Oichi was there to tend the castle’s garden that day. Smashing a one hundred ton metal hammer, as written on the hammer’s side, from hyperspace to the roof, Oichi split the two men off as they backed away, yelping in fear of being squashed.

“How many times do I have to tell you, Ujiyasu?! You shouldn’t treat Xu Shu or anyone violently like that!” lectured Oichi while resting the hammer to her side.

“Alright, I get it - I’m sorry! Just put that thing away, seriously!”

Oichi let out a deep, exasperated breath. “Really… as a Warlord, you have to show your followers respect and treat them with patience,” She turned around to Xu Shu who sat on the roof, shocked from his mistress’ sudden dramatic entry. “And Xu Shu! This is no time to argue at something trivial! Stick with the big picture in front of you – like fixing this roof, which has been mentioned for how many times till I’m talking now!”

“F-Forgive me, milady…” He bowed down to his knees at her in a blink.

Feeling that the two men had calmed down from her intervention, Oichi smiled and put the hammer away back into a hyperspace as it disappeared on her back. “Okay, now let’s all get along and finish our job for today. There’s a nice, hot meal waiting for us at the end of the day, hehe…”

“Y-Yeah…” The two answered coincidentally at the same time.

“Now, I’ll go back to tending the garden. Ujiyasu, you really need to get up more and do something about those weeds…” She said while about to climb back down to the castle ground.

“Don’t think I smoke them, you hear?” he absent-mindedly said.

“What was that?”

“Nothing… Just a random sentence and in no way I do what I said.”

“I didn’t catch what you said before, but alright.”

Suddenly the gate shook very hard from its foundation, making the three wobbly from their position.

“W-Whoa..! What’s this?! An earthquake?!” Xu Shu exclaimed.

Ujiyasu looked around as they shook more to see a big hole from Oichi’s mysterious hammer on castle gate’s roof, with cracks spreading from the hole as it rumbled continuously. “That’s the cause of all this shaking!” He pointed at the hole, just as the whole gate was about to give away. “It’s abandon gate! Jump off from here!”

“Eh?! But that’s… Uwahh!”

Quickly, Ujiyasu grabbed both Xu Shu and Oichi by their hands and hopped off the crumbling gate. The hole from the hammer, and also the small argument between Ujiyasu and Xu Shu, contributed to the gate’s ruin. But the three did not realize a racing girl with another heavy weapon, who was actually the one that caused the earth to shake wherever she ran, was closing in on the castle. When the she arrived there, the last thing she saw were three people jumping off from the gate’s roof before it fell down on top of her…

The three tumbled as they landed on the ground. The smoke from the crumbled gate was slowly dissipating as the three recovered.

“Ow ow ow…. Hey, you two okay?” The Warlord asked while rubbing his back.

“Ah… I think I landed head first…” Xu Shu murmured to himself before answering his lord’s question, “Yes, I’m fine my lord.”

“I’m fine too,” said Oichi as she groomed herself after getting up. Looking at the castle gate, she sighed, putting her hand to her cheeks and lamented, “If only you two didn’t argue… This wouldn’t have happened…”

“Milady… You don’t have the right to say that, seeing you almost smashed us with a metal hammer,” said Xu Shu in his deadpan tone, “Where did you get that anyway? How come it just disappeared like that?”

“It’s called a hole, Xu Shu. Just don’t think about it,” said Ujiyasu, “Anyways, everyone is safe and sound, right? Also my…” The Warlord noticed something missing from his mouth. He rubbed all over his clothing to check what he felt was missing from him. Cold sweat dropped when he realized both his pipe and his handheld were not with him.

“Now, now… get a hold of yourself, Ujiyasu…” He talked to himself, “Maybe I didn’t check thoroughly is all…”

Slightly panicking, he inspected his pockets and hidden slips on him for the second time before widening his eyes in horror that none of them really were with him anymore. Realizing the worst, he was about to scream out his lost prized possessions, but Xu Shu’s terrified voice beat his as he shakenly pointed at the rubble of the gate. “L-Lord Ujiyasu… L-Lady Oichi… T-T-Th-There’s…”

Noticing Xu Shu’s plight, the two looked at where exactly he pointed at the rubble. Among the debris of tiles and concrete, an unusual sight was caught on their eyes.

“M-MY PIPE AND VRD MORT ARE DEAD…!” screamed Ujiyasu while running towards the debris.

“No, you moron!” shouted Xu Shu as he caught up, with Oichi following behind him, “There’s a hand there.... Some ONE is dead!!”

Ujiyasu and Oichi slowly directed their head towards the only extending among the horrifying accident. As if a thunder shock from the heavens had stricken, the two gaped their mouth and shouted,

“OH MY GOD!!”

“Oh dios mio…!”

Xu Shu wildly moved his hands around, at loss on what to do first on the sudden tragedy. In his shaking, panicked voice, he yelled, “T-THIS SHOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED!! WE’RE CRIMINALS!! I-I CAN’T SPEND A NIGHT IN JAIL! I GOTTA TURN MYSELF IN…!”

“CALM DOWN, YOU IDIOT! DON’T GET SO EASILY WORKED UP!” Ujiyasu yelled louder as he gripped Xu Shu’s shoulders to snap him out, “If anyone’s going to jail it’s your mistress for destroying this ga- EH!”

A large rock-sized boulder landed hard on Ujiyasu’s head. “Don’t blame me! Xu Shu and I should be scot free while you spend the night in the slammer for being a lazy bum!” shouted Oichi before she prepared to throw another rubble at Ujiyasu.

“What?! You’re the one that almost killed us with that out of nowhere hammer, you idiot! My lawyers will hear about this!”

Looking at the ensuing chaos among each other, Xu Shu yelled at his masters, “STOP SAYING WHO’S GONNA BE IN JAIL! KEEP THIS UP AND NO ONE IS GONNA PAY ATTENTION TO US FOR BEING SELFISH PRICKS THAT YELL AT EACH OTHER!”

Seeing the point on what Xu Shu yelled at them, the three nodded at each other and calmed themselves down, taking deep breaths before approaching the hand among the rubble.

“Well, from the looks of things, this person ain’t dead yet. I hope…” said Ujiyasu nervously.

“Dead or not dead, we have to get him or her out,” Oichi started to give out directions while rolling up her sleeves, “Ujiyasu and Xu Shu, you two try to clear out the rubbles around! I’ll try to pry this person out!”

“That’s gonna hurt the guy more than it’ll save him, little mistress…”

“Lord Ujiyasu is right, milady… Besides we won’t make it on time to clear the debris. It would take a War God to instantly clear this all in one sweep…”

“Mhdmhmgrrdy… Hrayrrgurrd…?”

A muffled voice from the rubble startled the three, prompting them to focus their attention towards its possible source.

“My lord, milady, did you hear that?”

“Yeah. Loud and clear here.”

“Then that means we still have hope on saving him or her…” trailed Oichi, “Mmmhmm mhmrl mokay?”

“Milady?! What are you trying to say?!”

“I’m asking the person in mufflism. You know, to reach out to them. Don’t worry I read it in a magazine we subscribe to – I’m just using it into practice right now.” She continued to speak out in, from what she read, mufflism.

“Muffle what? I don’t know what or when we subscribed but I’m unsubscribing once we get home!”

“Oi! Look there you two!” Ujiyasu hysterically pointed at the rubble.

The figure of the girl that had recently arrived in Odawara rose from under the rubble without any difficulties, as she easily pushed the debris out of her way with her head and hand as if they were feathers. With her rod and balls also helping her on forcing the ruined gate off from her, she got out in one piece – the whole ordeal not affecting her energy and positive face as she posed a v sign with her arms.

“Then I’m here!”

Ujiyasu and Xu Shu stared silently with wide eyes, thinking to themselves that it was not every day that people see a supposed-to-be-dead-from-a-destroyed-structure-with-god-knows-how-heavy-and-suffocating-it-would-be-to-be-crushed-under-what-probably-is-more-than-a-ton-of-rubble-wait-how-did-we-know-that-I-know-it-because-I-live-here-you-idiot-my-lord-we-shouldn’t-hold-a-conversation-in-here-it’s-confusing-and-how-are-we-even-doing-this-exactly-petite girl. Oichi was impressed at the young girl and thought to herself that she might be someone special – and also she would be willing to reprimand the two men for silently staring at the young girl in a way that broke the mood at another time.

“Uwaah… It was pretty tight there. For a minute I thought I’d be there for a while,” The girl stretched her left arm as she rested her rod on her shoulder with her other arm. She looked at the three people in front of her with their own varying expressions on what they were seeing. Rather confused and worried, she said, “Oh, is there something off that I did? I’m really sorry if I did something wrong to you.”

“S-She’s alive…” weakly said the men.

“I’m glad I ain’t responsible for a body count in the workplace but…” trailed off Ujiyasu.

“It’s just not right…” Xu Shu continued his master’s sentence.

“Oh? Then should I be dead?” The girl innocently mentioned death. “If so, I can do it to make it up to you.”

“NO!!! DON’T!!” shouted Ujiyasu and Xu Shu frantically.

“Huh? But…”

“Ah, what they were trying to say is that we’re glad you made it out okay,” said Oichi while approaching the girl from the rubble, “You don’t have to do anything about it.”

While Oichi was talking with the girl and making sure that she was unscathed from the accident, Ujiyasu and Xu Shu looked at what the girl was carrying with her.

“Hey, Xu Shu… You see what she has there?”

“Yes, my lord… It looks quite heavy.” Xu Shu emphasized the word quite in his sentence.

“Yeah… a metal rod and two steel balls. Something you need yourself.”

“Excuse me?”

“That said,” he ignored Xu Shu’s last remark, “She doesn’t look like anyone from here. I need to ask her something.”

Ujiyasu walked the girl’s and Oichi’s position, leaving Xu Shu behind him.

“Ah… don’t say anything off please!” He followed to the others.

Oichi finished checking on the girl’s condition and was surprised. “Wow… aside from dusts and pebbles from the debris - I see no cuts, bruises or any sign of injury on you…”

Before the girl could say anything to Oichi, Ujiyasu and Xu Shu had reached the two women’s position on the ruins of the gate.

“Yo there, you alright?” From her cheery demeanor, the Warlord could already figure out the answer to his question.

“Yes, I’m fine! Thank you!” she bowed to him, causing Ujiyasu to feel rather uneasy with the sudden formality.

“Right… That’s fine then…”

“Still, I’m rather worried…” said Oichi, “You don’t feel hurt at all when you pick up what you are carrying?”

“Oh? Hold on, let me try…”

Lifting her barbell-like weapon above her head, she then slammed one end to the ground – at exactly where Xu Shu was standing. He let out a high pitched shriek as he narrowly dodged the girl’s iron ball to the side. As soon as the iron ball landed with a powerful slam, the ground shook, bouncing off everything on the castle ground still attached to it momentarily before they planted themselves back in.

“Hmm… nope! I can pick it up just fine!” confirmed the girl with an energetic nod.

The three silently looked at her direction. Each gaping their mouth with varying opinions than what the expression based on their mouth would tell.

“She’s good… Do you garden often?” asked Oichi happily to the girl.

“Milady, There are better questions to ask! I was almost smashed! Twice today!” yelled Xu Shu after regaining his balance, while angrily extending two fingers up.

“The boy’s right,” Ujiyasu faced the young girl, “Say, you just got out of that rubble. Mind telling me if you saw where my pipe and VRD Mort are?”

“THAT’S EVEN MORE WRONG FOR A QUESTION!!” maniacally pointed Xu Shu to his lord.

“Oh yeah!” the girl answered.

Xu Shu smacked his forehead in response to the girl’s answer to his masters. “Don’t answer their questions! Question their inhospitality or lack of common sense, why don’t you…”

Taking a very deep breath yet again, he recovered from his fit. He walked to the girl, trying to put his usual calm composure, and talked to her, “Umm… yes, we were amazed at how you managed to get out of the rubble unscathed like this and wondered a bit about you,” He smiled to her and gently asked, “Would you mind telling us who you are?”

Despite feeling rather confused because she remembered that she introduced herself when she was still buried under the gate, the girl introduced herself again in a more proper way – in her way. Jumping up high into the sky with her weapon on her hand, startling Ujiyasu and Xu Shu as they almost hit them, she landed to the middle of the castle ground.

“My name is Guan Yinping,” She twirled her heavy rod as if it was a small, light baton. “And I’m the descendant of the God of War!” She ended her introduction with her pose - standing on one foot while lifting her weapon with one hand into the air and winking playfully.

“Guan Yinping? Guan…?” Ujiyasu wondered aloud before followed by Xu Shu shouting,

“G-God of War?! As in the actual deities?!”

* * *

 

Meanwhile in the area near the main gate of Odawara’s border, the group of miscreants that had failed to terrorize, miserably, a village a few days ago managed to sneak by border patrol and got inside the city.

“Okay guys, the girl hasn’t gone far probably. She’s definitely in this one city.” said the miscreant leader. He rested his hands on his forehead as he looked around, thinking it would help him scout his target easier.

Vainly covering their noses and with some crying tears from their leader’s horrible odor as he raised his arms while scouting around, one of the men commented, “You know boss, we wouldn’t have needed the trouble to sneak in if you used that one-hit K.O odor of yours on the guards. The gate was pretty much unguarded anyway…”

“Oh yeah what’s up with that,” another one commented while pinching his nose, “Capital city’s guards are crazy with the no guard thing on the gates.”

“Hey, but in another city, guards are plenty and odor resistant.”

“No… Seriously?!”

The miscreant men discussed more and more about guards and somehow bringing body odor to the whole discussion. Irritated that no one helped him on the search; the boss turned to his men and shouted, “Hey, shut up about these guards and stuff! Don’t let your guard down! What if guards find you and you can’t guard yourself?!”

“Boss, you’re the one letting your guard down by saying guards a lot,” one of them said, “Still boss, why do we have to bother finding her? I mean it’s just one little girl.”

“What?! Just a little girl?! Are you blind, man,” He hit his lackey on the head. “She’s no ordinary girl, she’s a War God!”

“A War God?!” shouted all of the lackeys in unison, directing some attention from the locals at them.

“Yeah… It’s the usual reaction every time…” muttered the boss before continuing, “Yup, them few directly blessed by those mystics and get all these monstrous powers former humans. A god in human form. She’s a mighty keeper if she didn’t leave us willy-nilly.”

The lackeys became more spirited after hearing what the boss said about the girl they were looking for. They whispered about the possibilities they could do and get with a War God on their side. Possibilities that were grand to them but petty to anyone else, such as authority for their own group and endless amount of money to spend from their looting. The boss was no exception to this train of thought by keeping a War God.

“Say boss, how did you find her anyway?”

“I had my way on convincing her. Besides, no one can resist this pheromone I got, no?” He shoved his armpit to his nearest lackey, forcing him to resist gagging.

Odawara castle came into their sight in the distance, and the boss halted the lackeys to make himself sure of their target’s possible location. Smirking confidently that the War God was in or heading towards the castle, he ordered his band,

“Alright boys, we’ll pay a visit to that castle right there!”

* * *

 

“Oh yes,” the girl who just introduced herself as Guan Yinping talked to Ujiyasu, who stood near her, moments after she finished her introduction, “I come here to talk with this castle’s master. Is it you?”

Somewhat annoyed by her sudden directness, Ujiyasu narrowed his eyes while giving a curt answer, “If yeah then what’s it to you?”

“Yeah! I really did find it then,” she energetically cheered, flinching Ujiyasu from her sudden burst of energy. She put aside her rod onto the ground, causing a slight rumble, before bowing down. “May I please be right under you?”

“Huh?”

“What?”

“Oh my…”

Yinping looked up around her, only to see varying perplexed expression from the three people. “Huh? Did I do something wrong? I swear that’s what people always say to Warlords when they pledge their service…”

Xu Shu hurriedly rushed to Ujiyasu and Yinping, with Oichi calmly following, trying to lighten the awkwardness from Yinping’s mistake. “Oh, uh… no… It’s just that there was a slight grammar mistake, so to say…”

“Did you work in a brot- hmm? Xu Shu?” Xu Shu tapped on his mistress’ shoulder before she managed to finish her question.

Getting rather stumped and slightly embarrassed, the Warlord scratched his head while in an annoyed tone said, “Yeah, sorry kid. I ain’t accepting any applicant. Never did and never will, probably. In fact, these two here just appeared one day and forced themselves with me on their own free will.”

He rummaged through his pockets, but remembered his pipe was gone. With an inaudible grumble to the others, Ujiyasu picked up his cane from his waist to his shoulder, and walked towards the rubble.

“Xu Shu, Oichi, you two take care of this. I have a gate to fix, so excuse me.”

“My lord…” lamented Xu Shu of his master’s rude behavior.

“Hmph… Someone ought to wise him up when it comes to talking with others,” said Oichi, rather irritated. She turned to Yinping who looked surprised. “I’m sorry about him. He can be really uncooperative at times. Don’t take his words personally, okay?”

But Yinping was not dejected from Ujiyasu’s direct rejection, her surprised expression was actually her feeling fired up to prove her worth. Quickly standing up, which surprised Xu Shu again with her energy, she confidently declared, “In that case, I’ll show you what a descendant of the God of- no, what I can do!”

She was about to follow Ujiyasu before remembering she found something when she was buried. She took out objects she found and called him out, “Hey, master… uhh… Odawara… Warlord…? Sir!”

“Huh?” Ujiyasu turned around to see Yinping running towards him with both of her hands in the air, holding an object each.

When he caught glimpse of what she was holding, his eyes widened as his usual scowl turned into a happy, glad smile.

“K-Kiddo… You found my pipe and VRD Mort,” He ran towards her, laughing in joy, declaring, “You’re hired, God of War kid. I welcome you to the Hojo with open arms.”

“Whaaaa? So easily after all that saying of not looking for anyone, just because she found your stuff?!” shouted Xu Shu from the other side of the castle ground.

Suddenly though, one of her foot got caught in a stray pebble, enough to timber her down to the ground.

“Ah…”

“OH NO!!!” screamed Ujiyasu with his eyes popped open as two of his prized possessions are slowly falling down with Yinping.

The handheld landed on the ground, and with it, inevitably shattering it as the buttons and screen flew off from their original place. Ujiyasu widened his eyes in horror, with tears slightly forming, as he watched his handheld destroyed from the accident.

“N-No,” he showily broke down to his knees and kneeled in defeat. “All my hard-work…. Gone in a carnage of rock and concrete…”

“What are you saying now, my lord?” Xu Shu hid his face in the distance.

“Well at least my pipe ain’t that easily bro- Hoh?!” He turned to where his pipe landed from the fall, only to see Oichi standing near the pipe, with her foot almost stepping on it.

Xu Shu looked at his side, shocked, after just realizing his mistress already left his side without him knowing.

“Ujiyasu, you apologize to this girl right now for your rudeness. Do you hear me?” Her eyes turned dark, dissonant with her smile. “Until you do so, I’ll be keeping the pipe with me.”

Seeing Oichi picking up his pipe and then tucking it away in one of her pocket, Ujiyasu ran towards Oichi and desperately pleaded for his pipe.

“Give it back! It needs to stay in my mouth or else- Gohooo…!”

As he was about to reach Oichi, she kicked him in his stomach, sending him flying to the unkempt garden of the castle ground. He landed on one of the stone lantern, destroying it with a crash.

“Oooo…”  Yinping watched Oichi’s reprimanding in awe.

Unsure to whom he should reach out first, Xu Shu wildly shuffled his gaze between Ujiyasu and Oichi. Remembering that there was a possible new recruit, he immediately snapped himself out and ran towards her.

“Um… er… S-Sorry about all this… It’s just that Lord Ujiyasu and Lady Oichi almost regularly go through this and…” he wildly apologized for his master and mistress’ behavior with the two’s debate, and occasional thud, going on as background noise.

“Is this what people in Odawara do,” Yinping asked. Xu Shu was about to politely say no, but she beat him again by saying, “People help each other to better themselves while also physically training their durability at the same time? I’m really going to try my best for this Warlord!”

“Uh… no… they’re not training their durability. At least not that I know of,” Xu Shu noted the part of her remark on bettering selves. He wondered why she would like to better herself despite her claim to be a War God, the dimensional realm’s strongest beings after the actual gods from the mystic realm. Furthermore, he saw and narrowly experienced their strength himself at first-hand. Seeing some bits of him, minus being a strong deity figure, and interested to further know her motives to join Ujiyasu, he asked, “You’re a descendant of the God of War, isn’t that right? Why do you want to join us?”

She looked at the ground while thinking of an answer, and looked up towards Xu Shu with a big smile when she came up with something.

“I want to better protect everyone and bring happiness to the world,” she, with her lively energy, shouted, drawing Ujiyasu’s and Oichi’s attention to her from their small, hits and bruises from Oichi’s kick notwithstanding, argument.

“You see… I come from a place where people aren’t happy because of the whole riot and stuff going on,” Her tone suddenly turned solemn as she recounted her story, “My family decided that since the villagers put all of their trust on us we should evaporate from the village, bringing them with us,”

“Evaporate? I think you mean evacuate…” corrected Xu Shu.

“But in the middle of the way, another of those guys came and attack us and everyone on the village just get separated. So now I don’t know what’s happening to everyone – my father goes out every day to battle and look for the remaining villagers, with my brothers too, leaving me alone most of the time,”

“I-I see…” reacted Xu Shu in astonishment at her story.

“So I decided,” her happy exterior returned. “I’d travel and provide help to anyone in trouble along the way, with the payment being a happier world where everyone gets along becoming a real thing,” Yinping gasped lightly to herself before quickly adding, “Of course I already asked my family permission before deciding all this, hehe…”

Hearing her story, Oichi felt moved to help Yinping on her journey. She looked at Yinping as she also thought of what needed to be done. When she felt sure on the next step, she nodded to herself before nudging Ujiyasu’s arm, startling him slightly. “This is a good chance for you. Go apologize and accept her, Ujiyasu.”

He did not feel sure about the War God girl’s backstory, nor should he trust her. But seeing his disciple’s sincere expression for the girl’s plight and fear of another kick to a stone lantern in the garden, Ujiyasu said, “Alright, so I guess I was kind of… uh,” he nervously looked back to Oichi, who cracked her fists, before continuing, “Yeah… I was really harsh on you to say those things. So sorry about that,” Ujiyasu walked out of the castle ground, resting his cane from his waist to his shoulder. “Now with that outta the way, time to get a new VRD Mort before they sold out.”

Seeing his master suddenly walking off, Xu Shu shouted, followed by his mistress, “Wait! My lord, I don’t think we’re done here!”

“Ujiyasu, what do you think you’re doing, leaving like this?!”

“What? I said something for her to help with,” He turned around with his coy smile, “Come on, get your legs moving.”

“Does this mean…?!” Yinping’s eyes brightened in anticipation.

“Yeah, well… you said you wanted to help people, right? Then you found someone needing one right here.”

With another lively affirmation that she demonstrated for some time to the others, she jolted up, grabbed her rod and ran towards Ujiyasu’s direction, eventually passing by him as she pointed forward with all her energy.

Xu Shu and Oichi watched from behind before departing to follow Ujiyasu as well.

“Hehe.... She’s kind of like you, Xu Shu.” said Oichi nostalgically.

“Eh? How so, milady?”

“Even though you just met, you instantly choose to trust and open up to the person you feel have good characters. You were like that back when we took you in at Odani…” She put her hand to her cheeks as she reminisced.

“W-Well… that’s…. a tad different from this though… hahaha…” His cheeks turned red from her recount of their first meeting.

“And Ujiyasu… Well, I can’t say he’s the most pleasant person with that personality of his, but I can remember why you decided for us to take refuge under him.” She paused for a bit before hearing Ujiyasu’s voice,

“Can’t you calm down?! You don’t even know where we’re gonna go,” The Warlord turned around after trying to calm Yinping down, to see Xu Shu and Oichi walking slowly a few distance behind. “Sorry to interrupt your day time drama bonding, but we gotta go here.”

“D-Day time drama, my lord?!”

“Alright, we’ll be with you in a second,” Oichi then nodded to Xu Shu. “Come, let’s go!”

Oichi picked up her pace to Ujiyasu and Yinping’s side, leaving Xu Shu behind to ponder what his mistress just said to him, _It looks like Lady Oichi is beginning to warm up to Lord Ujiyasu, and this girl that claims to be a descendant of a War God… I can’t say I’m stronger than her or anyone here for that matter, but something tells me to exert myself for her… at least while she’s here in Odawara, our new home…_

Smiling to himself, he ran to catch up with the other three on their way to help Yinping’s step to realize her dream for a peaceful world by helping others.

* * *

 

Shortly after Ujiyasu and his followers left the castle ground, the group of miscreants that was searching for Yinping arrived.

“Boss, we don’t see anyone here!” one of the lackeys said.

“The place looks like it’s already ruined! I mean look at those rocks in the garden!” another one pointed at the destroyed stone lantern.

“Look here, I think this was the main gate too…” The lackeys whispered to themselves, commenting at the ruins they saw.

“Hehehe…. She was definitely here then,” said the boss, “Whatever guy had this castle couldn’t handle the War God’s strength and she left nothing but rubbles. Just like what every War Gods do – Wherever they go, they leave nothing but destruction,” The boss’ unusual serious tone, startled the lackeys before he then commanded his group, “Alright boys, we’ll spread out from here!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, no parents should let their children be free. Oh wait, wrong propaganda...


	10. People, how hard can this be?! You’re not supposed to go when it’s red! And no this chapter’s title isn’t immature enough as its content to say, that you went when it turned yellow!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh yeah, kids should stay in school.  
> And now back to your program.

“Alright, we’re here. Let’s go to that place where they prob-” Ujiyasu was cut off by Yinping’s audible observation,

“Wow! Look at this place!”

“And you already forget why we’re here…”

Yinping pranced around as ecstatic as she had been along the way when the four arrived at the market square of Odawara. Ujiyasu started to have second thoughts about her as he sighed loudly. It was the first time ever for Xu Shu to see someone very perky just by the thought of helping someone. Oichi just smiled patiently at Yinping’s eagerness.

“This is a big market!” She spun around extending her hands, with her weapon gripped on one of them.

“Gah!” her rod hit a person non-fatally on the head.

“Oh! There it is again! People here sure are lively with their ‘Gah!’ that I just have to repeat it every time!”

Yinping kept frolicking around the market square and admired every stand and sights with a gasp; each bigger than the last. Accompanying her amazed gasps were the grunts of people accidentally hit by her rod; each louder than the last.

“Hey, that’s the girl from before….” A voice among the crowd said.

“Yeah, and she brought.... Hey isn’t that…?!” One of the crowds pointed at Ujiyasu.

Almost reaching a boiling point, Ujiyasu stepped in to stop her. “Hey, stop prancing around while swinging your… thing like that!” But Yinping was still too happy and amazed to listen, prompting Ujiyasu to repeat, “Hey! Stop pr-AAAAHH!!”

The end of her rod flung Ujiyasu to a cart when Yinping suddenly turned around to look at a common stand. Seeing his lord crashing, Xu Shu hurriedly went to his side to help him up.

“Urgh…” Ujiyasu moaned in pain. “I expected the keeper to shout, ‘MY PRODUCE!!’ any second now…”

“Actually my lord… You landed on something else entirely…”

Ujiyasu noticed that Xu Shu was covering his nose with his hand and kept distance as soon as he helped him get up. He looked at his dirtied clothes to notice brown colorings here and there. An awful stench emanated from the browns.

 “Aww come on! This early in?!” Ujiyasu hastily pointed out while brushing off the manures from his clothes. “I know it’s still a produce in a sense but still! And why would anyone sell these ‘produce’ in a place where people sell mostly foodstuffs?!”

“Hmm? What’s wrong?” Yinping turned around to the two men.

“MY HORSE MANURE!!!” The cart keeper’s distressed shout was heard.

“Oh crap in a produce sense! We gotta get outta here!” Ujiyasu quickly ran away from the area.

“E-Eeeeh?! Why, my lord?!” Despite his protest, Xu Shu followed Ujiyasu.

“Come Yinping, we have to go now!” Oichi tugged Yinping along as she caught up to the other two.

* * *

 

The four blended themselves among the crowd to get away from the horse manure cart keeper, and although the lingering stench on Ujiyasu did not help them by attracting attention and countless gagging, with one passerby undoing his lunch, the four made it to the other side of the large market, with Ujiyasu and Xu Shu panting to catch their breaths.

“Huh…huh… Why… did… we have to… urgh….”  Xu Shu frustratingly and tiredly caught his breath, to slightly shout, “Do that?!”

“Hah… hah… Stupid idiot… Isn’t it obvious?”

“No.”

“I’m too lazy to reason with people right now. It’s either run or be runned.”

“That doesn’t make sense! Also, RAN! Not runned!”

While seeing the two arguing over what happened, with a tied in grammar lesson, Yinping felt rather guilty and asked Oichi, “Did I… do something wrong? They’re arguing a lot over there.”

“Oh, don’t worry about them. This happens almost everyday because of Ujiyasu’s personality and Xu Shu’s uncontrollable need to point things out is all,” Then she proceeded to lecture Yinping in her gentle voice, “Still, we were rather concerned about you. You suddenly went about out as soon as we got here that we feared you can get lost if we don’t keep an eye on you. Do tell us beforehand if you want to do something on your own,” She then pointed at the younger girl’s rod, “Also, it’s quite dangerous to swing that around in a crowded place. People can get hurt, you know?”

“Mmm…” Yinping slowly bowed her head down in reply. “I didn’t mean to do that…”

“Hehe… I’m sure you don’t, so don’t look so down suddenly like that.” encouraged Oichi softly.

Yinping lifted her head up, perked from Oichi’s trusting words, she clenched her hands and energetically nodded in affirmation. Oichi smiled at her in response. Just then, Ujiyasu and Xu Shu ended their latest routine and came to the two ladies’ side.

“Tsk… If we hurry up, we can get the VRD Mort from the store near here before the smell getting on me,” said Ujiyasu as he scratched his head angrily.

“Actually my lord, it’s too late for that as soon as you landed on the manures…”

“Don’t go and get distracted now, you hear?” he seemingly ignored Xu Shu and said to the three, especially Yinping.

“Yes.” They replied together.

Not reaching more than ten steps later, Yinping saw people fixing a roof of one of the buildings. She stopped to take a look before remembering Oichi’s words.

“Ah, wait everyone!” She called out.

Ujiyasu and the others turned around to see her staring airily at the workers for the rooftop.

“Ah, it looks like they’re changing that shop’s roof tile.” said Oichi.

“Oh that’s right. That reminds me of something,” Xu Shu turned to his master. “Don’t we have a broken, or more accurately, destroyed gate to fix? Shouldn’t we do something about that?”

“You idiot, you can’t build with an empty mind. We need handhelds to the job. They give us imaginations on how things should look like. That’s how we construct things the way they are.” Ujiyasu explained as he returned walking.

“No, I doubt that’s needed for anything to do with construction. We have what we have now even before handhelds exist. You’re just saying that because you want to distract yourself while we do the work, don’t you?”

“Hey misters, let me help you with that!”

“What?”

Yinping already ran towards the building as they turned around.

“Wha?! Where the hell is she going now?!” worryingly yelled Ujiyasu.

“Wait, what are you doing, Yinping?!” Xu Shu frantically followed.

“I can help you punch those tiles to make things quicker! Watch this!”

Passing the ladders and scaffolds, she sprung up above the roof where the workers were, and as hard as she could, for her kind, she threw her rod and balls onto a tile that one of the workers were holding. The workers yelped in surprise when her weapon landed, barely dodging its powerful thrust. The impact of the thrust left the whole building into a displeasing sight of a ruin.

“Goodness me…”

“That was totally wrong… in a lot of ways…”

“This little girl….”

When the dusts settled, the workers were dumbfounded when they found nothing that they were sure destroyed their work. The rod and ball had already bounced back towards Yinping, who was standing away from the debris she accidentally caused, as confused as the workers themselves.

“What’s going on here? What happened to that shop?!” A crowd gathered to take a look.

“Was it an earthquake? But then I didn’t feel any shocks.”

“Were rogue demons here again? That’s really horrible for them to do this…”

“Or maybe one of them so called War Gods! They always just destroy things just because they can!”

“Guh! What’s that smell?! Did horses come and go all over doing their business, or what?!”

Taking one of the crowd’s complaints, as a sign, Ujiyasu bitterly moved away to another area. He wildly gestured his arms to Xu Shu and the others to follow him. His student mouthed a confused, “Again?!” as he and his mistress followed, with her tugging Yinping along.

* * *

 

The four reached a cramped alleyway that barely fit all of them, forcing them to form two lines to see each other.

“Oi War God girl, what’re you doing till now?”

“Huh? I’ve been helping you finding that thing you wanted to get, no? What was it called again…” Ujiyasu sighed impatiently as she was loudly humming to remember his handheld’s name. “Huh? I don’t think I remember… There’s been so many people needing help and so many interesting things here that I forget about that…”

“Haah…” The Warlord took an exasperated breath. “You can’t even remember the important details of your main mission and you go around, making a mess on your own whim like that? On top of that, you still wanna help me? That’s kinda moronic of you.”

“My lord....!” Xu Shu called out.

“What? I’m just saying helping people out just doesn’t seem to be her thing. War God or no War God, kids like her should just stay home with her family.”

Xu Shu took a quick glance at Yinping who seemed rather shocked from Ujiyasu’s words, before he cautiously whispered to his lord, “My lord, you mustn’t say such things! I know she caused a lot of property damage and, uh…” he pinched his nose after remembering about the horse manure incident. “Well, point is, I know she’s not helping much but-“

“So you realize it too, huh?”

“Uh… that’s not what I meant but please consider...”

Both men’s voice became louder and clearer as Xu Shu tried to convince Ujiyasu about Yinping’s idea to help others. She realized how she was being nothing but a hindrance to the three people with her, and remembered one of the crowd’s jeering towards her kind. Yinping’s face became rather pale and her positive aura dwindled.

“No it’s okay,” she cut in between the two men. “You’re right, I caused a lot of trouble and I should’ve just stayed with my father and brothers.”

“Yinping?” said Xu Shu and Oichi concerned.

Her complexion turned back to her usual bright, happy self. “So that’s why I just decided to go back to them. So, sorry for being a burden to everyone here!” she bowed her head down towards Ujiyasu.

Both Xu Shu and Oichi were taken aback at Yinping’s sudden decision to go back home, especially the former. But Ujiyasu, keeping his uninterested expression, said to her, “I see. Well go then. If you hurry up, you can catch one of them blimps to your village in the main terminal.”

He pushed back Xu Shu behind him as he exited the alleyway.

“Wait, Ujiyasu! You have to take her with you!” shouted Oichi sternly.

“Sorry, but I have something to get before they’re all out for today. Maybe next time I guess.”

Mumbling to himself how he smelled more from the alleyway’s trashes after parting from the others, while also cursing himself why he ran there in the first place, Ujiyasu went on to look for his new handheld on his own.

“Hah…” Xu Shu took a breath. “Again, I’m really sorry about all this… My lord doesn’t usually just leave people on their own like that…”

“Although I have to agree with him saying that you have to focus your attention on one thing at a time,” said Oichi. “Still... are you sure you want to go back home?”

Yinping nodded, feigning confidence. “Uh-huh! And mister uh… oh, I can’t pronounce his name again…”

“Just call him yankee.”

“Milady, no.” Xu Shu was about to mention his lord’s name to Yinping before she blurted,

“Odawara Warlord…! Yeah,” her tone returned from excited to happy but serious. “Anyways, he was right. No one would want us War Gods to be here, so I should just go away.”

“G-Go away?! Yinping, nobody said you’re unwanted! My lord is just bad at expressing his words is all, he didn’t say you to-”

“Wow, city people are like broken record players. Everyone is saying ‘Gah!’ here and there, and you’re like a parrot that has speech impediment.”

“Huh? I-I was just…” Xu Shu was surprised at Yinping’s sudden bluntness.

“But I’ve been away from home for a long time that maybe it’s about time I return,” she looked up to the clear blue sky. “I couldn’t help Odawara mister Warlord and I ended up making a big mess that makes everyone sad and angry, like I always do because I don’t know anything to give for others.”

“O-Of course not,” Xu Shu frantically tried to cheer her up. “People make mistakes when they try their hardest to improve! Well… maybe not mistakes that destroy a whole building, but….” He tried to steer back his speech. “But, you shouldn’t stop trying your best because of mistakes and-”

“Xu Shu, you’re only proving yourself further as a broken parrot player like this whole plot.”

“But… milady…”

Oichi whispered to Xu Shu as she pulled him to the sides, “I get you mean well and want to help her. But we must respect her decision. So leave this to me.”

She then talked to Yinping, trying in a calm, neutral tone as possible for her. “I suppose it can’t be helped that it all comes to this. It’s true that what happened today with you could cause a lot of grief for other people and you were kind of useless,”

“Milady, you’re being too blunt again…!”

But she ignored his rambling and continued, “But, we understand you have good intentions and all of us respect that,”

“Oh…” Yinping slightly felt warm when Oichi mentioned her good intentions.

“I don’t really want to let a small girl like you off alone to this cruel world, even if you’re a War God, but…”

Yinping happily giggled at Xu Shu’s and Oichi’s thoughtfulness, and assured the latter, “I can take care of myself. I might come back after I know better, so it’s fine.”

“Even so…” said Xu Shu weakly.

“But I don’t know how to get to that big blimp stop from here...”

“Hmm… we are pretty far to it from here,” Oichi put her finger on her chin as she thought loudly, before saying, “But don’t worry, we’ll help you get there.”

“Oh, really?” Yinping asked in a glad tone.

“Yes. Xu Shu and I will help you get there safely,” She gave a sharp look with an unfitting smile towards him. “Aren’t we, Xu Shu?”

“Y-Yes… w-we will… So… uh… rest assured that we’ll help you just as you helped us.”

“Wow…” Yinping suddenly hugged the two. “Thank you so much… I never met people who are so nice to me. You two and of course Warlord Odawara mis….ter…? Yeah!”

“Y-Yinping….” Xu Shu slowly opened his mouth. “Y-You’re… You’re s-splitting my back… slowly…!”

She let go coincidentally at the same time he finished his sentence. Xu Shu was catching his air and rubbing his back while mumbling to himself in pain before saying to Yinping,

“You think my lord is a good man? Even after he left you for games?”

“Of course,” She gave a big, cheerful answer. “Nobody in my travels ever took my offer to help seriously. You people are the first to actually consider me to be helpful for what you’re in trouble with. Even if in the end, I messed up,” She paused for a bit before coming back with her energy,

“But, I’m as happy as a fly in manure with spiders for everything!”

“Eh? I don’t get your metaphor just now…. Does this mean are you happy or sad about this whole thing?”

“Still, it would be nice if I can say a better goodbye to Warlord Odawara…” wondered Yinping aloud, without answering Xu Shu.

Oichi smiled from Yinping’s genuine caring nature. She actually wanted to have her around, at least to make sure Yinping could actually achieve her dream, and judging from Xu Shu’s constant attempt to console her, she could see Xu Shu thought the same way. But as she said herself, she wanted to respect Yinping’s choice, and chose to let her go home.

“Leave him be. It can’t be helped if that yankee has something else in his mind he deems more important,” she began to walk out of the alleyway, before turning around to gently tap the two, “Come. If we go now, we can make it to the terminal before your blimp leaves.”

“Yes!” answered the two with a nod.

“Well look who we have here.” An unfamiliar voice reached the three.

Xu Shu immediately expected the worst, and looked around rather addled while shakenly asked the source of the voice, “W-Who’s there? W-Where are you?”

Suddenly the greasy, large-sized miscreant leader appeared from the other end of the alleyway behind them.

“Whoa! Were you there this whole time?!” asked Xu Shu alarmed.

“He’s the trashman, Xu Shu. He threw trash all over the alleyway and then he starts eating garbage.” said Oichi.

“Milady, I don’t know what you were referencing, but I don’t think this is the time for that!”

“For your information, lady, I don’t throw trash over this alleyway,” said the miscreant leader, annoyed. “Also I don’t eat garbage, but rub them on me.”

“That’s still weird for someone to do with garbage!” yelled Xu Shu angrily.

The leader approached Yinping, who was looking at him confusedly. Already thinking that this person was no one to be trusted, Oichi prepared to stand between them, forcing Xu Shu to do the same.

“So you end up here in some stinky alleyway again, huh? And here I am, finding you in the same way.” he said slyly.

“Again? Yinping, just who…?” Xu Shu turned to Yinping in surprise.

“Who are you?” Yinping asked bluntly to the leader.

His threatening demeanor took a sharp turn downwards to being irritated and flustered as he threw himself to the ground.

“Oi! I’m your boss! It’s clear enough from this pheromone I got!” He lifted his two arms, letting out a visible stink line towards the three, forcing Xu Shu and Oichi to cough and slightly gag from the seemingly-impossible-for-a-human-to-make smell.

“Argh… Goodness, have you ever heard a thing called shower?” asked Oichi aggressively as she covered her nose and mouth.

“You’re right, milady. He could use some soap and freshener and he’ll be… Wait, that’s not it!” Xu Shu snapped himself out, “Yinping’s your underling?!”

Hearing Xu Shu’s surprised shout and reminded by the leader’s ‘pheromone’, Yinping gasped while gesturing her finger to the air as she remembered, “Ah, now I remember! You’re that guy with the problem! Karadaniokusa!”

“It’s Tainosuke, you little brat! Learn to read right!”

Oichi stepped up to defend Yinping, and with her passive aggressive smile said to him, while still pinching her nose, “I don’t care if you’re Gonnosuke or Baragakuso, you don’t look like someone Yinping, scratch that, anyone would take a liking to.”

“Milady, please don’t do anything reckless again…!”

“What was that?! Lady, I am loved by people for my pheromone here!” He lifted his arms again, causing Oichi to reflexively lean back a bit.

“You keep using the word pheromone… I don’t think you know what it means.”

“Says you! Well, at least it’s better loved than this War God girl here that no one likes.” He turned to grin at Yinping, who turned serious from the confrontation.

“Hey, I told you I quit! I don’t want to join you and your gang anymore!”

“Y-You joined a bandit gang, Yinping?!” asked Xu Shu, shocked.

Yinping turned her head around to Xu Shu, startled from the words bandit gang. She faced her gaze downwards in regret as she sadly confirmed, “Well… yeah, I did...” However, her energy came back as she faced back her former boss and shouted, “But that’s the past! I’m the type that keeps seeing forward in life, and that means I won’t come back for you!”

“Well boo-hoo. It’s not like you have a choice here!”

 “Milady, th-they’re behind us!”

“Eh?”

Before they knew it, a group of miscreant lackeys had blocked the alleyway behind them, with more coming from the boss’ side of the alleyway.

“W-What are we going to do?! I can’t see a way out!” cried Xu Shu, as the lackeys were closing their distance on them.

“Yinping,” Oichi whispered, “Now is a good time to show how you thrust that rod and balls of yours to these troublemakers.” She gave her an affirming nod.

“Milady! A woman of your stature should not say that kind of sentence!”

“Don’t blow it, Xu Shu! Oh, good grief…. NOW!!”

With Oichi’s shout as a signal, Yinping easily pushed away the lackeys behind the three with a thrust, knocking them out. With the path cleared, Yinping quickly made her escape from the alleyway, looking back to wave at her new friends to follow her.

Oichi nodded and smiled, before roughly taking Xu Shu’s hand, startling him back into reality from his panic.

“Hey, no fair! Get them!” ordered the leader fumingly, starting their hunt around the market square.

* * *

 

Ujiyasu wandered around, looking for a store or vendor that sold his handheld. Embarrassed and annoyed from the constant attention he was getting from him being there, especially the smell of the horse manure, he impatiently looked left and right for any possible sight of his handheld.

“Crap! Do people these days don’t sell entertainment anymore?! Thirty six places and no sight of the VRD Mort, geez,” He looked at three kids near him who were looking at him funny. “What? Crap is still light. When you’ll get older, you’ll get bigger words of relieve.”

“Actually, we wondered why old geezers like you still play games.”

“Get a job, smelly old man!”

“Mommy! Daddy! A grumpy old hippy taught us the C word!”

“Who’re you calling hippy!? Also C word doesn’t mean crap! There was no C word! I didn’t teach you crap besides crap!”

The kids already sprinted away from Ujiyasu before he could manage to fix the misunderstanding.

He sighed loudly and took out a lighter from his pants pocket, while also reaching into his robes. He rummaged his robes’ pocket until he remembered his pipe was not with him.

“Oh yeah, Oichi still has it…. Crap, I need a crappin’ smoke at times like these....” he scratched his head as he continued to ponder aloud to himself, “Might as well get this over with so I can get it back sooner and stop saying crap while smelling like crap.”

He resumed his search again.

* * *

 

Yinping and the others managed to shake of their tail, and hid themselves behind an empty stand on the market. She took a quick peak from the bottom of the stand’s table to check if their pursuers were still around. Assured that none of the miscreant was around, she sighed in relief and sat back to the ground.

“We should be safe here.” She said.

“Wait… huh…” Xu Shu slightly wheezed for air. “We’ve been… running… quite a lot today….” Finishing his complaints to himself, he asked Yinping, “They said you were a member of that gang,”

She looked away in reaction.

“But why? I can’t imagine you would….”

“Those guys said they needed help when I first met the guy,” she started, cutting Xu Shu yet again. “When he came to me, he said he wanted to make the world a better place, I think…”

“How did you think he was a good-”

“Be quiet, Xu Shu! Let her finish!” scolded Oichi, flinching Xu Shu to stay silent.

“So we set off to form a band with them and went around like that and there to villages. I actually did notice he was receiving a lot of money for our services, even when the villagers didn’t want to… He could’ve been a lot more modern, but….”

“Uh... Yinping, I’m pretty sure he was plundering them….” pointed Xu Shu. “Also I think you mean modest?”

“I was getting to that part! But then I realized people hate us more and more until they downright admit they are bandit guys, stealing from people! That’s just wrong and un-nice of them! I know I was wrong and what I said was an under the state’s contract but…”

“U-Under the state’s contract? Did the mystic government approve that?! Or were you just trying to say understatement?! I’m very sure you wanted to say understatement!”

“I see,” said Oichi consolingly, “Yinping, you admitted you joined the wrong side, and that takes courage.” She closed her eyes and smiled encouragingly. “Yes, a courage to take a big step to change for the better, to make up for the mistake you made that troubled many people.”

Yinping was again impressed and moved by the kind, although rather blunt, words by the people she met in Odawara. She had been hiding her insecurity about her self-worth as a War God, and her personal goal for a peaceful world by keeping a positive, cheerful outlook.

“Milady is right,” affirmed Xu Shu warmly. “People learn and better themselves through what they experience every day,” He nodded and smiled at the War God girl. “Yinping, you are driven to improve for other people’s well-being by your good conscience. At least, that’s what we, even our lord, see within you, haha….”

With Xu Shu’s trust to her personal belief, Yinping smiled. It was not her wide, cheerful smile that she had been showing to everyone she came across, but rather a humble, light smile, along with her eyes that turned poised and down-to-earth in contrast to their usual animated form.

“Thank you… That means a lot to me,” She clutched her chest lightly as she whispered her gratefulness to herself. “Thank you…”

“Yinping?” Xu Shu looked concerned at her sudden change of behavior.

“ALRIGHT,” She suddenly jumped up, with her usual excited spirit, surprising Xu Shu. “I’m feeling a lot more confident to help others! World, I come for you now!” She stretched her hands in excitement, forgetting that she was hiding behind a stand. The force from her hand and rod ruined the stand, revealing the three to other people around.

“Hah! Just so I thought! You were hiding behind there the whole time,” One of the large lackey shouted from their opposite side. “EAT THIS!!” He threw a heavy crate of oranges from one of the stand at the three. The merchant was exaggeratedly screaming for his oranges.

“Uwaaah! I-It’s coming this way!” Xu Shu cowered at the incoming crate. His mistress reflexively shielded him, despite knowing she could not withstand the blow from it should it land.

“FULL SWING!!” Yinping quickly batted the large crate back at the lackey with her rod, crashing it into him instead.

Xu Shu slowly opened his eyes when he heard the crash, only to see the large lackey buried from the oranges and groaning in pain as he was seeing stars.

“There she is! She caught the bait!” More of the lackeys came running their way.

“Oh, these guys are just pushing it!” protested Yinping.

She braced herself to fight them off, but remembered she did not want to cause anymore trouble for the people around her.

Noticing her trouble, Oichi said to her, “Yinping, at times like this, everything is licit,” She scanned around her surroundings and saw a three people bike, conveniently located next to them. “So let’s use this bike to run them flat.”

“Milady, that’s not using it right!”

“Hmm… you have a point….” She cupped her chin and thought up, “It can’t be helped, I’ll throw this bike to block their path. When that doesn’t work, you two run while I beat them all out.” She started to pick the bike above her head.

“Uh, no!” He yelled to prompt his mistress to put the bike down. “It’s wrong and contradicts about not troubling others when we take this… But I suppose this is what Lord Ujiyasu would do at times like this too….”

“That Warlord Mister of Odawara would throw bikes at bandits?” asked Yinping.

“Stop thinking about throwing bikes towards other people, please!”

Xu Shu noticed that the miscreants only came from one side. He assured his judgement and plan, nodding to himself.

“Everyone, we are riding this to get to the terminal! We can shake them off by going through this way.” He pointed at the road where there were no chasers and, conveniently, scarce crowd.

“Hey! Isn’t that stealing? That troubles the owner!” said Yinping.

Xu Shu paused for a bit, but imagining what his lord would say and do at times like these, he quickly recovered. “I know it’s not right to do this, but our priority now is to get you to the terminal safely. Come on, let’s go!”

Oichi smiled proudly at Xu Shu’s decisive action. She tapped Yinping’s shoulder and said,

“Don’t worry, Xu Shu has a good hunch on these things. We’ll take care of the rest, so hop on and let’s get you home!”

Seeing her helpers’ confidence, and remembering their kindness towards her, she trusted them completely and rode on the third seat at the end.

“Okay, let’s go!” Xu Shu signaled them to start peddling.

The chains of the bicycle creaked slightly as they started to paddle. But the difference of power on each paddle made little progress on their escape, with the one in most the front not peddling as strong as the two women behind him.

“Xu Shu, go faster! They’re going to catch up on us at this rate!”

“I’m trying, milady! Oh…. This is harder than I thought it would be…” He peddled harder at his mistress’ command.

“Come on you can do it! Don’t let reality and laws of physics win!” cheered Oichi.

The sound of the miscreant band’s shouting was getting closer, to the point of earshot. Oichi shouted louder about how physics were trash against willpower to Xu Shu, but his stamina reached its limit, and he could not peddle any faster.

“Why, Xu Shu?! Why are you letting physics win?! Go! Propel us to freedom!”

Oichi’s mention of propel gave Yinping an idea. She faced back while still maintaining her feet on the peddle, sticking one end of her rod upwards.

“Hold on everyone!”

The two at the front looked at Yinping. Oichi quickly understood and peddled faster as she also braced herself on the handle.

“Huh milady, why are you…?” He glanced back at Yinping. “What are you…. EEEEHEHEHEEEE…….!!!!!”

The bike zoomed forward at an impossibly astronomical speed. Astronomical for the front biker as he claimed to see stars and space because of the speed from both Oichi’s peddling and Yinping’s incredibly fast twirling of her rod to make a makeshift, super-effective propeller.

“Don’t be silly! We are now one with the wind, not space!” said Oichi.

“I don’t care which! How are we even doing this on a bike of any kind!? Uwaaaaahhhh!!!!”

* * *

 

At a small train station in the middle of Odawara, Ujiyasu climbed the stairs leading to the platforms, the smell of the horse manure repelling the commuters. He remembered a store that possibly sold his handheld was located at the area, and looked around for a sign of it.

“Oh, there it is,” His gaze found the sign of the store. “Gamepots. There’s no doubt that they have to have a VRD Mort.”

A train stopped by the station, before leaving towards the blimp terminal in high speed. Ujiyasu stopped to look at the rail where the train was. He looked at it vacantly and thought to himself,

_Thrown into the tracks while being stuck in a trash can, huh?_ He scratched his head, trying to shake the possible reference in his head off. _Nah… That ain’t happening to them. I mean I don’t have a scooter to swoop them up to safety or anything anyway._

A store employee – a similarly middle-aged man like Ujiyasu, sporting a long, black hair, with a black mustache and goatee on his face - came out of the store to plaster a poster on the window. He noticed his oldest patron, both literally and figuratively.

“Ah… If it isn’t Uji himself,” Ujiyasu turned to see at the employee.

“What the…?! You work here,” The Warlord was shocked to see him. “You’re not supposed to make an appearance now! Shoo! Scram! It’s too early to do a direct fourth wall joke!”

“I expected to see you here,” The middle-aged employee grinned putting a non-existent feather fan in front of his mouth, ignoring Ujiyasu’s frantic protest. “You are looking for something precious for you called VRD Mort, no?”

“Stop that! That description about the feather fan and your irritating, know-it-all speech are dead give-away so cut it out! Also say the console’s name right, Goddammit!”

The employee closed his eyes with his grin still intact, as he kept going in his soft, whispering voice.

“Haha… I understand your plight, Uji. But I am sorry to say that some large men came and bought the last of what you are looking for,” He showily looked up at the sky. “However, I can help- wait,”

Ujiyasu was leaving the area before the employee could finish.

“Uji, where are you going?! I have not told you that I heard three people are high-speeding to the terminal and you should check it out yet! Also, I have not pointed out that sudden odor of yours and how you should not be here unless you want the temple priestess finding out!”

“I was about to go there even without your long-ass exposition!” The Warlord picked up his pace towards the main terminal, leaving the familiar store employee behind.

“It’s always like this…. Just why…” He mumbled angrily to himself.

* * *

 

Xu Shu panted for air for yet another time as they arrived at the main terminal.

“You need more exercise, Xu Shu.” pointed out Oichi.

Yinping looked at the main gate of the terminal. Countless number of people flowing in and out of the terminal, it was as busy as how Yinping saw it when she just arrived earlier. She felt sad to part with her helpers in Odawara, despite just meeting them, and began to doubt her desire to go home.

“It’s okay, Yinping,” Xu Shu’s gentle, mixed with tiredness, voice reached her ears. “When you improve for the better, the time will come that we meet again.”

Yinping felt as if her mind was read from his words.

“We’ll guarantee that. Now go. The blimp won’t wait forever.” followed Oichi.

Yinping took another look at the gate, before nodding proceeding to walk inside the terminal.

“Thank you for everything,” She turned around and waved at Xu Shu and Oichi. “I’ll always remember on how everyone was so kind to me here!” After her goodbye, she continued to walk in.

“On second thought,” Yinping heard a creaky voice from behind her. “Why don’t you stay with us forever?”

“WOW! REALLY?!” She giddily turned around, thinking it was Xu Shu pleading her to stay. She did not expect to find the miscreant boss with a hard to pronounce name right there, locking both Xu Shu and Oichi in the neck. His lackeys stood behind him intimidatingly.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing?!” She angrily shouted. “Let them go!”

“Nah, I think I’ll keep ‘em like this until you answer our demand.” The miscreant leader said.

Xu Shu and Oichi tried to break free from the lock, but to no avail. The miscreant leader laughed as he taunted, “Struggle all you want! But you can’t ever break free! Haha!”

“Urgh…. If it wasn’t for your horrible smell I could easily break free and kick your butt!” hissed Oichi.

“I told you it’s pheromone! And like you’ll kick my butt, missy!”

“Please don’t tempt her. She can really do it,” Xu Shu stopped trying to break free to intervene. “I saw her manhandled a boar once…”

The leader directed his attention back to Yinping, who was preparing herself to fight him. He slowly tightened his arms around the two, covering their mouth.

“So what’s it gonna be? You sure you don’t wanna come back to us,” Even Yinping knew what he was about to say, seeing her two helpers at their mercy. She stayed silent, while glaring at him.

“I’ll let these two go and we can all go back to our lives in peace if you hear me out,” Seeing how Yinping still did not want to answer and how she braced herself even more to attack him, he enticed her further, “Don’t you remember what you are, War God?”

Yinping jolted a bit hearing her kind’s name used disdainfully.

“You’re only good for battle; you don’t belong in a peaceful place after the war like this. Start a scene here and you’ll only make people hate you further, don’t you know that?” The leader’s tone turned dark and serious again. “If you come back to us, I can guarantee a good life for you despite your ‘reputation’.”

Yinping lowered her stance as she became rather distraught at the leader’s mention of how War Gods were rejected after the war. She knew her kind was not accepted for how destructive their powers were, because they were blessed solely for the war. But she did not want her helpers, the people that gave her a chance to redeem the War Gods’ image that they could also live during peace times, to hear the reason they were hated.

The leader smiled slyly, thinking he got Yinping cornered.

“Alright,” Yinping forcibly yielded. “You let them go. If you do that, then…”

The leader released his grip from Xu Shu and Oichi’s neck, and shoved them away. He gestured his fingers to the lackeys behind him as Yinping slowly walked to his side.

Still recovering from the harsh shove to get up, Xu Shu looked up to see the leader had one of his hand gesturing on his back. He realized the leader had something in his mind, and screamed,

“Wait! Yin- Ugh!” The lackeys appeared right behind Xu Shu and his mistress, capturing them before Xu Shu could call Yinping out.

“Haha! You thought you could just get back easily don’t you?”

“Huh?!” Yinping turned around to see her helpers tied by some of the lackeys that were behind the leader. “Wait, when did that happen?! Are you an evil genius this whole time?”

“You don’t think that you can just get back in and do things half-assed for us, do you? You better work double the effort and no quitting if you know what’s good for these two.”

“Hey boss, I got the VRD Mort handhelds for us to play on the way back.” Casually said one of the lackeys near Xu Shu and Oichi.

“Hey, that’s…” Yinping remembered the object that she was looking for the Warlord when she saw the lackey holding a box of the handheld.

“Ah! Let us go,” demanded Oichi. “You trying to take us away again made the air fouler than that Gomisuke of yours!”

“What kind of logic is that?!” The leader, however, noticed that the air had a strong stench than exceeded his ‘pheromone’. “Hey, what gives?! Who’d actually smell worse than me here?!”

“Ah, he admitted.” commented Xu Shu dryly. “But it’s true… The air feels murkier all of a sudden…”

“B-Boss! T-There’s something coming from there!” A lackey pointed to a path side where there was smoke trailing from an incoming black-red figure.

“RRRAAAGH!!” The figure yelled from the distance, and the stench grew stronger.

“Is that…?”

“My lord?!”

“Hey, it’s Lord of the War Sir Guy!”

The leader tried to make sense what were the three referring to, especially Yinping’s inconsistent word choice. His eyes widened when the figure dashed closer and closer, revealing Odawara’s Warlord angrily charging at their direction.

“DON’T LAY A FINGER ON THEM, YOU IDIOTS!!”

Ujiyasu flipped, both physically and mentally. The side of his foot hit one of the lackey, dramatically sending him flying alongside the others that held Xu Shu and Oichi as they got caught up on the trajectory. The lackey that Ujiyasu kicked dropped the box of the handheld that Ujiyasu had been searching.

“Lord Ujiyasu, you came to rescue us!” happily declared Xu Shu.

“Well, it looks like you came to your senses in the end.” said Oichi proudly.

“Huh?” The Warlord picked up, and opened the box. “Oh yeah, sure…” The Warlord turned on the handheld and began to start looking for games to play. “Phew… Good thing they didn’t lay their greasy hands on this baby.”

“Wait! When you said, ‘Don’t lay a finger!’, you just meant that handheld? You just came for that handheld, my lord?!”

“I told you don’t scream things in front of the VRD Mort! It has feelings too,” Ujiyasu tucked his handheld on his arms in defense. “Besides, I did say them, as in not just that…” He slowly said as he got back to look on his handheld.

The leader was shocked and surprised that Ujiyasu had appeared, even though the latter was not paying any attention to the former or his gang. He nervously looked back to his remaining lackeys and yelled, “What are you waiting for?! Get that bastard!”

“But boss, he smells worse than you! He reeks horse manure!”

“Hey!” Ujiyasu turned his head to them in annoyance. “I didn’t ask to smell like horse manure today!”

“Agh! Just get them already, you bastards!”

Ujiyasu put aside his new handheld, and prepared his cane to fend off the incoming lackeys, but Yinping, who was standing between the miscreants and her helpers, quickly in instinct, sprang into action.

“HOOP!!”

She swung her rod at the two incoming miscreants, knocking them out instantly. As another miscreant was about to run past her on her back, she pulled her rod in between her left arm, hitting the miscreant on his stomach, incapacitating him.

“Damn! I should’ve restrained her…!” The leader muttered to himself before yelling again to the remaining lackeys, “Just get her! I don’t care how strong she is, just get her!”

At this point the crowd of commuters had already disappeared as the uproar began to escalate, presumably with some of them already went ahead to report to the authorities.

With the miscreants starting to gang up on her, Yinping planted the back end of her rod to the ground, making it stand upwards as she hanged on it. Lifting herself from the ground, she twirled herself using the rod as a base for her hand, kicking away all lackeys near enough.

“I’m amazed she can handle those thugs on her own.” commented Oichi.

“S-She’s really adapt to this…” Xu Shu said to himself as he witnessed how easy Yinping took care of the large miscreants. “War Gods… They’re really a force not to be trifled with…”

Ujiyasu relaxed his stance and smiled, letting out his new handheld.

When Yinping gained enough momentum, she sprang with her rod in her hand, and slammed the balls, causing a minor quake at the vicinity.

“Whoa!” The three behind Yinping tried to regain balance from the shake.

“N-No way! She’s too strong!” The remaining few started to flee. “Sorry, boss but we quit! You’re on your own!”

“H-Hey! What do you mean by that! C-Come ba- Hee…” The leader chocked in the middle of his command as Yinping firmly planted her rod, causing another quake.

“Sanosuke!” She called the leader out.

“I-It’s T-Tainosuke…” he shakenly corrected as he slowly backed away.

Yinping began to slowly walk towards him. Her outgoing, playful nature replaced with a firm, serious, and dignified presence as the corner of her eyes sharpened at his direction.

“D-Don’t…  y-you realized what you’re doing here….?” He nervously said. “Look around you… Y-You’re… only proving further that W-War Gods are destructive people in this time… You can’t deny that your power just cause more tro-”

“That’s enough out of you, lowlife!” She cut him loudly, flinching him. “It’s true that I, a War God, have strength that is destructive in nature,” She spun her rod up into the air. “I might mess up and cause a lot of trouble because of this strength, but I promise myself that I always try to do the right thing for many people by using it for good in whatever time we live in, unlike you!”

Her rod and ball charged towards his direction at quick speed from her downward swing. Resigned to the incoming punishment, and paralyzed as result, another horrible stench came from the leader’s bottom as Yinping’s swing narrowly landed between his legs.

“Ah, you got a new pheromone problem there.” Yinping’s cheery delivery came back.

* * *

 

After the confrontation ended, Yinping, along with her helpers, took the miscreant leader to the changing room near the bathrooms, waiting for him to clean himself up.

“Now make sure you wipe it thoroughly, okay?” shouted Yinping from the bathroom doors, followed by a weak, but audible yes from the inside.

“Don’t make us see any yellow spots! In fact lock yourself up until the guards come or else you’re in for another trouble with the War God!” threatened Oichi, which caused the miscreant leader to yelp fearfully. She sighed loudly to herself before coming towards Ujiyasu, who was busy with his handheld console, while covering her nose.

“You know, normally I’d put that game of yours away and force you to wash yourself too now, but…” She scavenged inside the pocket of her robes to let out the pipe she had confiscated earlier. “Here, you can just have this back for your trouble on saving us again for today.” She smiled behind her covered mouth.

“Heh… thanks.” He took back his pipe.

_It’s like I keep getting gratitude from scary ladies these days… Eh, at least everything’s back is all that matters._ Ujiyasu planted his pipe back in his mouth.

A sound of a blimp taking off was heard from their area, alarming Xu Shu.

“Oh no! It looks like that was Yinping’s ride…”

“Wait, how do you know that? We haven’t seen her buying a ticket home,” said Oichi. “Ah, that reminds me: Does she even have money to buy one?”

Everybody looked at Yinping, waiting for an answer from her.

“Hey… How did you get here to Odawara anyway?” asked Ujiyasu concerned.

“Hehe…” The War God girl blushed and scratched her head. “To be honest, I don’t have any money even before I got here, so I can’t buy a ticket to go home…”

“Yinping…” Xu Shu slightly twitched. “Don’t tell me, y-you stayed in the…”

“But that’s all in the past now,” She quickly brushed aside the three to their opposite side. “Besides, I learned a lot of valuable things about helping people after all what happened today,” She turned around with a big, genuine smile to the three. “And that to me is a lot more valuable to me than a ticket ride back home, hehe…”

“Oh, uh… Well, we’re glad to be part of that, haha…” said Xu Shu shyly.

“I’m happy for you too…” Oichi’s celebratory tone quickly changed to worried. “Still, what are you planning to do now that you don’t have any money to go home?”

“Mmm… Everyone’s probably fine without me, so…”

“Guess I don’t have much choice,” started Ujiyasu, directing everyone’s attention towards him. “You did a good job with finding me a new VRD Mort, so I guess you could come with us as your reward, at least for a while, heh…”

“What?” Yinping slightly jumped at his offer. “But, I said I was fine without any reward or things like that and…”

“It’s your choice; take it or leave it,” The Warlord began to walk away, with going back to the castle on his mind. “Let me just say that the world out there is too crazy even for War Gods like you to handle.”

Yinping’s eyes brimmed as she saw him walk away, while he also complained that he needed a lot of hours staying in the tub at the end of the day.

“What Lord Ujiyasu was trying to say is that, uh… hehe…” Xu Shu blushingly tried to welcome her to the Hojo.

But Yinping already understood what the Warlord meant despite his brusque delivery. She instantly zoomed towards Ujiyasu in joy with her arms stretched, surprising Xu Shu before he could break the news.

“From this day onwards, let me call you Papa!” Ignoring the manure, she hugged Ujiyasu from behind, unwittingly lifting him up in her happiness. Xu Shu instantly ran towards them, to try to pry Ujiyasu out.

“Gah! Y-You idiot! M-My new VRD Mort in my b-back pocket….! G-Grrghh…!”

With a piercing scream, two things from Ujiyasu snapped spectacularly into two. Oichi giggled, knowing that her life in Odawara would become livelier with Yinping joining the Hojo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This whole chapter (and fic) is brought to you by whole plot reference.


	11. Remember, your feet should never be on the dining room table!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Hojo recruited a War God to their ranks! A War God! Well, a young, unpolished War God but still... A War God!  
> An unexpected combination of four personalities had gathered under one banner!

Half a week had passed since Yinping decided to stay in Odawara and took residence in the castle after she accidentally destroyed Ujiyasu’s handheld by her inhuman strength as, in her words, to make up for it – Coupled by Xu Shu and Oichi secretly not willing to let her stay with them or else their own two months’ worth of food would instantly be gone in the same time span Yinping stayed in Odawara castle till now, as it would follow.

One breakfast, in the afternoon, Ujiyasu looked down on the dining table in disbelief and hopelessness.

“Wow! Castle meals are really good! Can I have another serving?” The War God girl raised her bowl up as she still gobbling up the rice in her mouth.

“Umm… Yinping, I think that was your fifth bowl from the last 20 minutes…” Xu Shu came in with another serving of rice.

Yinping happily accepted the rice from Xu Shu’s hands, followed by a gentle thank you in her cheerful tone.

“That’s my month supply of rice and miso…” Ujiyasu furtively lamented.

“That’s good isn’t it,” said Oichi who was sitting beside him as she happily watched Yinping eating ravenously. “She reminds you to work your butt off three times harder for your retainers from this point on.”

“I’m having a hard time just to feed myself, and now you’re saying I have to work hard for my dental plan too?”

“My lord, what retainers are you even talking about…?”

As Xu Shu finished his sentence, Yinping had just finished emptying her rice and miso bowl with an audible slurp. She smacked her lips, savoring the last bits of taste before rubbing her belly in satisfaction.

“Can I have more please?”

“What?!” Ujiyasu screeched unexpectedly in soprano, smacking the table and glared at her in disbelief. “Didn’t you see that?! It said you’re satisfied. Full. No more! I haven’t even gotten my fair share of rice yet and you almost emptied the whole container!”

“Ah... Lord Ujiyasu…” Xu Shu slowly said.

“What now?!” The Warlord turned to his protégé impatiently.

“You… do have a point there….” Ujiyasu was rather surprised that Xu Shu rarely agreed to what he thought. The Warlord slightly smiled as he calmed down and let Xu Shu continued, “We only have one more sack of rice in the castle’s pantry now, so I suppose we should try to hold our appetite….”

“Umm… I can’t help it,” Yinping said. “It’s my first time eating tasty castle rice and I always thought you should always start your day with a full stomach.” She stuffed her mouth with another bowl of rice.

“That said, why are you now eating my share?! Stop eating, you contradictive, hungry idiot!” The Warlord plunged to the middle of the table, trying to get his rice bowl back.

“Ah!” Oichi lightly shrieked at Ujiyasu’s sudden movement before standing up and stepped on him repeatedly. “Stop it this instant! Your body shouldn’t be on the dining table ever!” However, Ujiyasu was not stunned by her kick unlike usual as he still wildly tried to take the bowl back.

“Training while having breakfast? Wow! Papa thought of everything!” Yinping misunderstood the whole situation, and dodged her bowl from Ujiyasu’s hands every time he was about to reach it, sneaking more helpings each time.

Oichi tried kicking sense to Ujiyasu, but the violent rumbling of the table and Ujiyasu moving unpredictably in accordance to Yinping’s own movement caused her to miss and hit a miso soup bowl, flinging it to spill on Xu Shu.

The wetness from the stray soup and seeing how immature everyone became, Xu Shu’s fuse went out in a matter of seconds. “You three stop being morons! I’ll show you who’s boss for wasting that miso I cooked!” He plunged himself, literally, into the fray, elbow first.

Breakfast, at lunch hour, suddenly turned into a small showdown for the rice bowl as the four started to fight, or in Yinping’s case train, around the room, with Ujiyasu drastically pounding towards Yinping before she spun away and dodged him each turn.

“HERE COMES BODY SLAM!”

“THIS IS FOR FORGETTING TABLE MANNERS, YANKEE!!”

“YOU TWO STOP TACKLING AND KICKING AND JUST START ACTING YOUR AGE! YOU’RE RUINING THE INTERIOR!!” Xu Shu then tried to restrain Yinping by shouting, “Also Yinping, just give Lord Ujiyasu his rice back please!”

She ignored Xu Shu as she kept running around, eating the rice bit by bit. “Weeee…! This is fun! We should do this every day!”

In the middle of the commotion, the door to the dining room opened, but the four were too busy running around to notice who opened it.

“Ah... It’s rare for Ujiyasu to be so lively as early as this time of the day,” The person at the door looked around to see Xu Shu and other two women she never met before thrashing around the room with Ujiyasu. “Ahaha… And who do we have here?”

“Hic..!” Ujiyasu stopped dead in his tracks after hearing a familiar chuckle from the doors.

“My lord?” Xu Shu, who was recovering from his own attempt at tackling the other three, turned to the door where he saw the white-hooded temple priestess with her staff. “M-Mistress Aya?!”

“Who?” Yinping and Oichi looked at the door; right after the latter landed a flying kick to Ujiyasu’s head, crashing a hole to the wall.

When the four stopped their chase completely, Aya slowly walked inside, her composed, dignified aura emanating. The sight of the flipped dining table, with bowls and puddles of the miso soup littering the floor caught her attention. “My, are you having breakfast? This early in the afternoon? Well, I can see you need to get used on eating normally again,” She turned to see the four people in the room, who had made a line in haste by Xu Shu, not counting Ujiyasu who still had his face planted firmly on the wall. “Ah yes, and I see we have ourselves new faces.”

“Y-Yes mistress Aya…!” Xu Shu tensed, reflexively straightening his posture. _This is bad…! The whole room is a mess and Lord Ujiyasu has his face on the wall!_ Xu Shu took a quick glance to his side, where his mistress seemed relaxed despite Aya’s presence. _And the worst part is that milady is here when mistress unexpectedly came…!_

Yinping finished up the last glob of rice, pouring it all to her mouth. She noticed as she chewed that Aya was looking at her, smiling. “Papa, there’s a weird old lady staring at me funny.” She casually said to Ujiyasu with her mouth full.

_UGGWAAA….!_ Xu Shu’s face jumbled in nanoseconds. _Y-Yinping! WHY DID YOU SAY THAT?!_

A long-winded, high-pitched, creaky grunt that could introduce a sitcom about home improving was heard from Ujiyasu.

“Oh…” The air grew heavy as Aya’s eyes darkened while keeping her calm, in many ways dissonant, smile.

Ujiyasu had just managed to get his head out of the wall, only to see Aya staring intensively at Yinping, who was innocently clueless at what was going on. _Flap! Flap! Flap! Flap!_ He hurried to shush the War God girl.

“You carry such an elegant, yet hard-working composure. Do you garden?” said Oichi before Ujiyasu managed to reach their side, freezing him in a running motion as his colors drained completely. Xu Shu, who had been completely tensed throughout, sweated to the point of making a puddle under him.

“My… To be called elegant and hard-working? Ahaha…” Aya unexpectedly blushed as she took Oichi’s compliment. “Please come over…” She gestured her hand to Oichi, which she followed. “You, yourself, carry such poise and refinement… The emanation you carry…”

“Such praise… My utmost gratitude for your acknowledgement, my fine lady.” Oichi bobbed a curtsy at Aya before the two women held a friendly conversation.

_I-IT’S A MEETING OF TWO DEMON GORILLAS!!_ Both Ujiyasu and Xu Shu screamed inside their head together.

Ujiyasu recovered and quickly nudged Xu Shu’s arm. “Oi! I told you not to let the two meet! Didn’t you get what I said?!” He angrily whisper-shouted to his protégé.

“W-Wha?! I had no idea that Mistress Aya was coming today! You live here, you should’ve known exactly when she’d come!” He angrily replied, whisper-shoutingly as if that was a thing.

“You idiot! Do I look like a calendar?! It’s not like she tells me when she’s gonna come!” He nervously turned his head to see the two conversing ladies as they laughed, with Xu Shu doing the same. “This is bad… It’s like I’m witnessing a fusion dance of two of the world’s most dangerous! This is bad, Xu Shu!”

“Hah! My lord, look!” Xu Shu pointed to the ceilings. “T-There’s something coming out from milady and Mistress Aya… a-and they’re gathering above them! It’s like black clouds condensing into one big void!”

“Oh my god…” Ujiyasu uttered as his face flopped down with his fingers. “The worst part is happening…”

“E-Eh? What worst part?!”

“THEY’RE GETTING ALONG! TWO MONSTERS WHO SHARE AN AFFINITY ARE INCREASING THEIR FRIENDSHIP METER!! THEY’RE SYNERGIZING!!!”

“EEEEEHHHHHH!!??”

Yinping switched her gaze back and forth between the two women at the door, who were picking up really well, and the two men who dramatically stumbled back and froze in place. “Papa, Xu Shu, I don’t get the words that weird old lady and sis are talking about. And what’s this synergizing that you just whisper-shouted? Are they energy bars?”

The younger man recovered his colors and composure to answer Yinping’s question in his friendly, explanatory tone, “No, Yinping. Synergizing, you see, is an action where two or more objects comb- IIIAAIHH…!” The Warlord’s fist landed a clean smack on Xu Shu’s head.

“Now’s a bad time to be a subtitle note, you moron!”

“Owowow…” Xu Shu angrily yelled as soon as he recovered, “YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO HIT ME FOR THAT YOU KNOW!”

“WHISPER-SHOUT YOUR COMMENTS! I’M TRYING TO SAVE ALL OF US FROM OUR IMPENDING DOOM, YOU IDIOT! ALSO SYNERGY IS THAT COMPUTER THAT MAKES HOLOGRAMS! GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT!”

“WHAT SYNERGY IS THIS MAN EVEN TALKING ABOUT?!

It was the first time Yinping saw the two’s usual argument. She opened her mouth in amazement and wanted to happily join in on the fun. “YINPING! YINPING’S EXCITEMENT! OOH!”

Ujiyasu and Xu Shu shielded their ears from Yinping’s sudden sing-song yell, breaking off their own yelling argument. “Wait, you know that?” Ujiyasu asked.

“Well everyone’s synergizing today, so I just wanted to join in on the fun by saying what’s on my head.”

The Warlord raised his eyebrows, taking interest. “Really? Ying it again for me.”

“Uh… ying it, my lord?”

“Yeah, yelling and singing. It’s a synergy, Xu Shu.”

“…No…” Xu Shu’s dry negation contrasted Yinping’s joy when the Warlord made a term from what she did.

“Okay! TRULY OUTRAGEOUS!” She yinged as told.

“Whoa! You even got that right! Now let’s try whisper-shouting it.” Ujiyasu gleefully prompted.

“Umm… M-My lord… I don’t think that’s a good idea…”

“Huh? Why, Xu Shu? You should have faith to your comrade’s singing prowess. It raises morale when the time comes. It’s called synergizing.”

“Stop saying synergy! The word is starting to lose its meaning! But it’s just that we’ve been yelling and… Hii…!”

“What’s- GEH?!”

“Papa, Xu Shu? Hi-Geh? Oh! Then-.” Oichi’s hand tapped to Yinping’s shoulder. “Oh, hey sis! Did you finish talking to that weird lady?”

“Yinping, you shouldn’t call other people weird and old from first impression. That’s rude.”

“Ahaha…” Aya stepped in between Yinping and the two men. “You are new here and I heard your plight from Oichi, so I will let you off with a warning.” She threw a stern glance from her narrowed, friendly-looking eyes to Yinping.

“Oh? Uh... okay…”

“Now stand back and watch what would happen the next time you misbehave.” A black aura surrounded the priestess. Ujiyasu and Xu Shu could only helplessly shiver as Aya slowly took the two by their heads.

“Wait, Mistress Aya!”

_Milady!_

_Oichi!_

The two happily noticed her voice with tears in their eyes. _At times like this you can think clearly, right? You’ll bail us out from the punishment too, right?_ Both of them thought the same thing as if they read each other’s mind.

“I have a thing or two to teach them about table manners and no indoor voice. We must synergize to get them both in line!” The pink maiden said.

“Oh… Bad role models, lack of etiquette and not whisper-shouting? Agreed. Let us synergize our powers for these two hooligans.” Aya and Oichi stood next to each other with the black aura concentrating around them, with the black void reforming itself again.

“WHAT?! WHY?! I WAS TRYING TO GET MY BREAKFAST! DON’T SYNERGIZE ME! I WAS WHISPER-SHOUTING UNTIL THEY MADE ME NOT DO IT!”

“W-WHY, LADY OICHI?! I-I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WRONG! IN FACT I WAS TRYING TO PREVENT BAD ROLE-MODELING AND ETIQUETTES! ALSO EVERYONE HERE NEEDS TO GET A DICTIONARY!”

As the void covered what was happening in it from Yinping’s point of view, all she could hear was the painful, amazingly in soprano, scream from Ujiyasu and Xu Shu, along the sounds of bones cracking and spines bending in the wrong direction.

“Wow… They transformed…”

* * *

 

With both Ujiyasu and Xu Shu planted on the wall, the ladies gathered in the messed room.

“So, she said she wants to help people?”

“Yes, Yinping here has a wonderful idea that can benefit everyone. Go ahead Yinping, tell Mistress Aya more on what you’re planning.” Oichi gently tapped Yinping’s shoulder, encouraging her to move in front of Aya.

“Umm… What was that again? Oh yeah!” She overcame her nervousness after seeing what happened and cheerfully said, “I was thinking to open up a guild or something like that where we can help people!”

“Oh?” Aya showed interest from Yinping’s proposal.

“Yeah! We’ll help them build houses, catch wanted criminals, look for their lost stuff, walk their dog no matter how big or small – We’ll do EVERYTHING! And when something strange in the neighborhood we-!” She flapped her hands as she excitedly kept going.

“Wait, hold up!”

“Oh my, you’re still standing, Ujiyasu?” The sudden presence of Ujiyasu surprised Oichi.

“Are you saying you’re making a jack-of-all-trades?!”

“Wow, I never thought there’s a name for that!” Yinping gleefully said. “Yeah! We’ll call it that and then we can make the castle as our home base and…”

Before Yinping could say more, Ujiyasu put his hands over her mouth. “Slow down, you id- uh… yinger… You just referenced way too many things in one sitting…”

“But I think this is a great idea, my lord,”

Xu Shu’s miraculous appearance caused Ujiyasu to jump. “Geh! When did you get out of the wall?!”

“Even during this time of peace, from what we experienced from the past few days, I guess a sort of do-anything agency would be a good thing.” Xu Shu happily and confidently said.

“Hey?! You-!”

Before Ujiyasu could protest, Oichi cut in, “The two have a point. It’s a good chance for you to get off your butt and actually do something for your followers and people than lazing around and mugging for lunch money.”

“Huh?! I don’t do th-!”

“And then we can learn more about the people, and then we can get stronger from each challenges facing us, and then…!”

The room was beginning to become lively as Yinping, Xu Shu and Oichi eagerly shared their ideas and thoughts, with Aya happily listening to every single one of their suggestions, while also persuading them more to tell what adversary they would face. Noting that everyone was caught in the whole discussion, Ujiyasu could only sigh in irritation before silently pulling Xu Shu away from the discussion, which none of the ladies noticed. “Oi, Xu Shu… What are you doing agreeing to their idea? It’s not like you to be giddy about this stuff…”

“Haha… I think it’s great, my lord. Just like what milady said, even if she could say it less bluntly…  We could finally earn something more stably for you to pay your rent, and also to restock the food Yinping ate…”

“But I already got everything I need before you… urgh…”

“My lord, please think about it…”

The gentle, pleading tone of Xu Shu and the excited exchange of ideas on the background between the girls were not necessarily the main reasons that made Ujiyasu think about the sudden change of pace in his life. He had always been content by just living alone in his provided shelter, his former Odawara castle, in peace without the whole trouble of taking part in problems around him after the war. Adding the fact to him that he was provided with the bare necessities and enough food to sustain himself by Aya, Ujiyasu felt burdened enough by just having to think of ways to get money to keep staying in the castle, to buy more tobacco for his pipe and most important to him, to buy the games he needed for his past time...

“On second thought… You know what, Xu Shu? You do make a damn good straight man and voice of reason for any situation.”

“Eh? Ah… I don’t really get what’s that has to do with what we’re currently discussing, but thank you, my lord?”

“Read between the lines, you idiot. I’m trying to say that maybe…” He scratched his hair before continuing, “I could agree to this knock-off business the yinger proposed.”

Xu Shu beamed at his master’s realization. “Really?! Ah, I’m happy that you finally see it, my lord! I’ll tell the others right-.” His shoulder was tugged by Ujiyasu’s hand before he could completely turn around.

“Argh, wait up…. Did you forget about the deal with the castle? She looks like she is dead set on setting the HQ here in Odawara castle. In case you’re a goldfish, this place isn’t mine for me to make a home business just like that.”

Even in his indoor voice, Aya noticed from Ujiyasu’s worrying and annoyed scowl what was on his mind. A single clap from her hands silenced the room, as Aya happily announced in her demure voice, “Very well. It is settled.”

“Mistress Aya?” Xu Shu anticipated a good response from the priestess.

“The helper guild is officially in service, with Odawara castle as its headquarters and the temple serving as front desk, public relations and all money related department, as of me finishing this sentence with a period,” She hit the floor with her staff. “Period.”

Everyone except Ujiyasu roared in celebration, especially Yinping with her upbeat exclamation, and confetti and balloons fell from seemingly out of nowhere. He quickly, somewhat hysterically broke up the celebration. “Wait! Wait! Wait! You can’t say yes when I didn’t have a say in this! Whatever happened to voting and democracy for the guy living here?!”

“Priestess’s decree, non-negatable.”

“…Damn it…” The Warlord slowly sulked. “I hate it when she uses that red-lined word…”

When Ujiyasu submitted to listening what the others had to say for the next step, Yinping instantly started, “Ooh! I call leader position!”

A subtle yet obvious, somehow, look of disagreement appeared on Oichi’s patient expression. “You’re a bit too jumpy for the leader role, Yinping,” She then boldly pointed to herself. “I propose a gentle, willing to listen, strong, yet calm-headed leader. Preferably blond such as me.” She added.

“But milady… you’re not really… Never mind…”

The debate to choose their leader, among other things, between them, minus Ujiyasu who was still with his arms folded, became rather heated. Already thought of the solution at hand, Aya decided to take control of the discussion.

“Everybody....”  Aya’s voice instantly broke the loud discussion again. “I shall first lay the ground rules for all to follow: Your house will be like your family, your triumphs will earn you points, any rule breaking and you will lose points…” She continued in her calm, stern tone, “At the end of the year, the house with most points-.”

Realizing the rules Aya set, Ujiyasu jumped from his silence and pointed out, in a whisper-shouting as mentioned way, “S’cuse me, but it’s four people here, not houses… We’re not being original, but let’s not directly quote a wizard school professor in our setting here…”

“Alright then… We won’t use points but rather ‘contributions’. Ujiyasu, you owe me five folds more for the box for this idea.”

“WHAT?!” He stumbled. “How’s that supposed to-!”

“Haha… Stand down, Ujiyasu. This is not how a leader supposed to behave in front of his followers.”

The Warlord spaced out in response when he was referred to as leader by the priestess. To be suddenly appointed as a leader of the abruptly founded, definitely an idea picked up from somewhere, odd jobs business paralyzed Ujiyasu, until a happy clap from Yinping snapped him out. “Of course! Papa fits the whole criteria! I knew I was right to call you Papa in the first place!”

“Haha… I can agree with Lord Ujiyasu being the president actually, with milady’s criteria in mind…”

“I was actually referring to someone else,” Oichi quietly said to herself before saying, “Still, we have high hopes under your leadership, Mr. President. Hehe…”

Ujiyasu, still rather stunned by the sudden appointment and not just because Oichi teasingly called him Mr. President, could only stare blankly at the happy, hopeful faces of Yinping, Xu Shu and Oichi.

“Now as I said: treat each other as family from now on. Treat your leader as your father, and as for the leader… Well, treat them as you want to be treated. Haha…” Aya prepared to leave, but before she exited the room as she slid open the door, she turned around and said, “Now, I’ll be announcing the new business at the temple. I’ll make sure you will receive a steady line of work starting today, Ujiyasu.”

As Aya closed the door, Yinping instantly grabbed Ujiyasu by the neck and pulled him to a hug. “Oh papa, thank you! I’m only here for less than a week and you already thought all this!”

“H-Hey! L-Let go…!” He struggled to even breathe from Yinping’s freakishly strong grip.

“Okay, first things first, awaiting your orders, Mr. President.” Oichi, along with the others stood and waited.

It was officially a change of pace in Ujiyasu’s routine. He always wanted to lead a carefree lifestyle, free from responsibility, free to do what he wanted at his own whims. But starting now, he found himself carrying a sudden weight of responsibilities he never wanted to burden himself with.

“Hey Papa, come on! We need your guidance, hehe!” said Yinping.

Xu Shu could feel that the whole thing was a big change for his master, taking Aya’s story she told him some time ago into account, and he calmly tapped his master’s shoulder. “Worry not my lord… We will do everything we can to help each other at all times…”

“Y-Yeah…”

“Cheer up, my lord! Maybe we could help you clean this room before Mistress Aya gives our first assignment?” Xu Shu gently invited Ujiyasu.

“Sure…”

Incredibly eager for their first assignment from Ujiyasu, Yinping dashed out of the room to start cleaning the whole castle. Oichi quickly followed, asking the War God girl if she knew where to get cleaning supplies in the first place. Looking at how high-spirited everyone was, Xu Shu had hoped that Ujiyasu could be a bit more motivated for his followers from that point on, and also live up to his moniker, Lion of Sagami, for which was one reason Xu Shu was interested to serve him in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eating, drinking, working, and then getting your back unwittingly snapped by a War God are part of life cycle.


	12. Your speediness will be awarded in the next life.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the first day! But trusted with their first job, who's waiting our newly found 'family' in the midst of it all?!

“Oops… I think I broke the floor…”

“Yinping… You were only mopping the floor… How was that even…”

“Now Xu Shu, don’t lose track. Keep your focus until everything is clean,” reminded Oichi as she kept scrubbing the miso-soaked floor. “There. Now it’s spotless!”

Ujiyasu stopped his sweeping and then came to look at the spot. “Spotless that there’s literally nothing?! You just punched another hole on the floor!”

“Don’t be silly! Stand on it and see for yourself!”

Ujiyasu rather irately, yet also frightfully, stepped on the literally spotless floor, closing his eyes expecting physics to take effect. He slowly opened his eyes down at the floor below as nothing happened before sighing in relief.

“See? I wouldn’t punch a hole on the floor.” She assured with a smile.

“But walls on the other hand…” Xu Shu quipped to himself.

Convinced and slightly embarrassed by his accusations, Ujiyasu scratched his cheeks with his finger and said, “Alright… Sorry I doubted you for a bit… Now that’s out of the wa- AAAHHH!!”

“My lord?!” Xu Shu raced to the floor that suddenly gave away, only to see his master landed back first on the ground floor.

“Ah, I mopped Papa’s spot a little bit before sis continued.” Yinping lightly said.

* * *

 

Falling down two stories to the main door of the castle, Ujiyasu painfully got up and snapped his back into position, slightly whimpering as he did so. He did not notice the door had opened as he was still adjusting his back and neck from the fall.

“Ahaha… Slacking off on your first day as President, hmm?”

Ujiyasu had just snapped his back with another loud crack as Aya finished. “More like cut me a slack… It’s not even half an hour and there’s an accident in the workplace here…”

Just then Yinping and the others came down from the upper floors to check on Ujiyasu, only to see him already sitting up with Aya at the main door.

“Oh hey, it’s miss priestess! We’re dutifully reporting, ma’am!”

“Y-Yinping… It’s mistress…! Also I think you mean reporting for duty…”

Aya chuckled again from Yinping’s blunt addressing, noting to herself that she would spare no kindness to Ujiyasu if he wouldn’t teach Yinping properly. But focusing on her role, she continued to give the four their job for the day. “There has been sights of a suspicious man with a katana in black cloak roaming around the magistrate’s office.”

“Oi… oi… You shouldn’t accuse someone as being suspicious just because their black.” said Ujiyasu as he was standing up.

“My lord… Are we doing that now? Besides the black one is the cloak…”

“Yeah that’s what I said. I didn’t say they’re on my last sentence.”

Oichi appeared between them and intensely landed her elbow to Ujiyasu’s and Xu Shu’s chin, snapping their necks aback. “Let’s keep sensitivity in mind for now, okay? Please continue, Mistress Aya.”

“Thank you, young lady,” She smiled. “Now, he’s might be a wanted rebel and no one knows how he looks like because his face is obstructed by the straw hat he wears. But every report of his sight always mention of his long hair and an insignia on his katana.”

The word rebel and the description of the katana wielding man aroused Ujiyasu as he rubbed his chin – partly to lessen the pain from his recent el-blow from Oichi.

Despite the consenting majority, there were Warlords that opposed the forming of the Mystic Government. To ensure stability among all beings in the realm, the Mystics banned wielding any sort of visible weaponry and took control of the lands owned by former Warlords, with Odawara being no exception. But there was a loophole within the mentioned policies which the rogue demons abused, and some Warlords just could not see humans live side by side with demons in their former domains. As a result, discontent Warlords raised armies throughout the realm and attempted to create their own ruling separate from the Mystic Government.

Normally the rebels would be discreet in their movement as every domain was under watch of their prefect, but the man Aya described seemed to be rather careless in keeping his cover, a trait that reminded Ujiyasu of someone.

“Katana? So his name should be foreign…” said Yinping, breaking the sudden lull.

“Yinping… Katana and katakana are different things entirely…” corrected Xu Shu.

Oichi cupped her chin, thinking aloud, “An obvious sword wielder at times like this? He could be another one of those bandits…” She then said to Aya with her fist in the air, “We must punish him before he does anything, is that it?”

“Seriously, what’s up with you with instantly wanna beat people up for being suspicious?!” yelled Ujiyasu. Taking his own thoughts on the person into account, he stepped in front of Aya and said, “Come on now, in these days people sometimes just wear one of those fake swords and wigs to get attention right? If he is someone dangerous then just let them prefects take care of him…”

“If you go to the magistrate and investigate, I’ll give you your month worth of food and this…” Aya took out a VRD Mort box out from her sleeves.

“ALRIGHT YOU FOOLS! PUT YOUR SPIRIT INTO IT FOR OUR FIRST MISSION!” Ujiyasu instantly appeared walking outside the castle with his fist pumped in the air.

“WOO!!” Yinping followed with her pushing her rod up, along with Oichi, leaving a rather disapproving Xu Shu behind with Aya.

“Ahaha… It’s been a while since he’s so spirited to lead, even if it’s with a bit of bait and switch.”

“B-Bait and switch…” He absent-mindedly repeated.

“I know things are becoming more and more unconventional for you here, but don’t forget what I told you, okay?”

He snapped out of his daze and nodded confidently. “Yes, Mistress Aya!”

“Now go to your teacher’s side. You might learn something unexpected from him for today.”

“Oi, Xu Shu! The sooner we start this the better!” Ujiyasu’s voice was heard from the gates.

“Ah! I’m on my way, my lord!” After a quick bow to Aya, Xu Shu immediately hurried to catch up with the others.

* * *

 

“Papa, that guy looks suspicious… Ooh! And that one there has the air of a criminal! I can feel it.” Every people she pointed with her absolute fingers, so she called it, slowly made way.

“Stop pointing at random people, you idiot! None of the folks you pointed match the description!”

As Ujiyasu scolded Yinping, the four were closing their distance to the magistrate office.

“Hmm… It would be easier if there’s a picture of the man… He should be wanted for being a rebel.” wondered Oichi aloud.

“W-Well... That’s true…” said Xu Shu. “But Mistress Aya did say his most noticeable features are his long hair, visible sword and black cloak, then maybe…”

Something about the long hair just kept bothering Ujiyasu as they nearly arrived to the gates of the magistrate’s office. “Well, the safest thing we could do is just wait around until he comes.”

As they reached the gates of the magistrate’s, the guards immediately beat their spear to the ground, and strictly shouted, “Halt! Entering through here is restricted!”

“Eh?! Umm… We’re here to answer your request about the suspicious man…” said Xu Shu nervously.

“Yup! We’re the...! Uh… We’re the…” Yinping turned to Ujiyasu. “Uhh… Papa, what’s the name of our team again?”

“Do we even need that? Just say we’re sent by that crazy priest-.”

“No, we need a catchy name,” Yinping persisted. “How about Yoro- Zhmmya!”

Ujiyasu closed her mouth with his hands before she could finish.

“Out of all things you can pronounce, don’t say a direct reference again… Let the others imagine it.”

“Mmm…” Yinping came up with another name. “Then what about Papaya Dojo? It has your name on it!”

“My name ain’t even there in the slightest! Also people are gonna think we’re some sort of fruit store, you idiot!”

“Ujiyasu, Yinping! Don’t argue about our group’s name in public! I have a better idea for a name anyways!” Oichi tried to break their argument, by mixing herself in.

Xu Shu sighed in embarrassment before saying to the disbelieving guard. “Please forgive us… We are Odawara’s Hojo, sent to assist the magistrate.”

“Hojo? So it’s true…” A masculine, yet benign-sounding voice was heard.

“Who’s there?!” The guards shouted, surprising Xu Shu and causing the others to stop arguing.

In just a split second, a sound of a sword slash was heard, and an after image of the slash appeared at the torso of the guards, flinching Xu Shu as he fell to the ground. The guards dully tumbled, revealing a man in black coat and a straw hat.

“Xu Shu!” Ujiyasu and the two ladies quickly ran to pick him up.

“Ah! He’s that suspicious black guy priestess ma’am said to us!” shouted Yinping as she pointed at the man.

“I knew that I would meet you here again, old friend.” The cloaked man said.

“Huh?” The three exclaimed at the man mentioning their leader.

“That voice… Don’t tell me, you’re….!”

“Yes it is I, you’re longtime comrade!” The man dramatically threw his straw hat to the wind, revealing his flowing, dark hair and his ivory, smooth face. “Mitsuhide Akechi!”

“M-My lord’s longtime comrade?” repeated the stunned Xu Shu.

* * *

 

Ujiyasu’s intuition and gut feeling had been telling him that he would see someone familiar from the moment Aya gave them their job for the day, but he never expected that said familiar person would stupidly reveal himself near the magistrate’s office like a certain so-called patriot terrorist.

“I always waited the day that we would meet again, Ujiyasu.” He folded his arms before continuing, “Yes, this is what they call fa- AAY?!”

The Warlord violently swung the cloaked swordsman, Mitsuhide, to the walls of the gate with his cane. “Why are you trying to hold a casual conversation right after you just cut down two guards in cold blood?! Why do you reveal yourself in the middle of broad daylight, especially near authorities like the magistrate?! God crap it… You made me pull the old-friends-fighting-each-other-when-they-meet-again cliché.”

“Ururu…” Mitsuhide writhed on the cracked wall before landing back on his feet. “Not to worry. I didn’t cut rather than just stunned them.”

Xu Shu went to the guards and noticed that they were still breathing. “Ah… He’s saying the truth… But how?”

“That I can explain, if you look at my sword that is…” Mitsuhide pull out his katana from his waist and showed it to the four.

Ujiyasu took it out from its sheath and looked at it in amazement. Staged, “Oh… How can this be? The grip of this sword is reversed… LIKE I GIVE A CRAP!!” He threw Mitsuhide’s katana to the ground in comical temper.

“Wow, you’re really making Papa mad. Did something happen between you two?” asked Yinping.

“D-Did she just say papa?!” Mitsuhide’s face went blue and his eyes turned white. “Ujiyasu, when did you…?! Who…?!” He switched his sights to the lady with pink attire behind Ujiyasu. “Ah, of course! Forgive my manners! You must be my friend’s legal partner.” He bowed on his knees to her, much to her bewilderment.

Before anyone had a chance to react and make a comeback, Yinping excitedly declared, “Of course we’re all Papa’s legal partners! We’re a newly formed family!”

The pupils in both Xu Shu’s and Ujiyasu’s eyes shrunk as she innocently declared that. It was clear to them she needed to expand her knowledge on vocabulary with its proper meaning.

“A family… I have learned something surprising in my espionage mission today…” He jolted a bit after accidentally revealing his motives. He slowly turned to Ujiyasu’s direction, trying to fix the conversation, while slightly keeping his composure. “Ah, fear not. I was only passing by, yes just passing by, for a stroll. Yes.”

A moment of judging lull passed between them.

“YOU JUST BLEW YOUR COVER, YOU IDIOT!!” Both Ujiyasu and Xu Shu yelled to Mitsuhide’s ears.

As a small shouting interrogation took place, Yinping stepped back to Oichi’s side and asked her, “Hey sis, should we do something about that man? He’s just weird than anything…”

Oichi nodded. “Yes, I’m not even sure if I should personally reprimand him or not… He knows his manners and doesn’t seem to be malicious… even though he just stunned the guards by slashing at them? Huh…” But aside from those factors, Mitsuhide’s teal and violet armor and robes beneath his black robes caught her attention, and she also noted how he easily blurted out his purpose of coming to the magistrate’s office. Oichi blankly stared at the arguing men as she was recounting to herself.

“Hey, Sis?”

Coincidentally, the young mistress clapped her hands as Yinping asked. “Well, we’ll just let nature run its course. Don’t worry Yinping, let Ujiyasu and Xu Shu have their time with this Mitsuhide person. Besides, anyone who wince ‘Ururu…’ seems gentle enough to be a gardener of sorts.”

Meanwhile on the interrogation, right after Ujiyasu and Xu Shu yelled their lungs out. “Right… Like I was saying,” The Warlord faced the cloaked swordsman in his usual scowl. “You’re on an espionage mission? What’re you planning to do here in Odawara, huh?”

“I don’t want to point fingers, but there must be something more than just espionage,” said Xu Shu. “You were frequently sighted in this area according to the reports, for one….”

“Were you planning to set fire to the place? Because they usually do those things after knocking out the guards.” bluntly and possibly referenced Ujiyasu.

As if expecting that, Mitsuhide answered with a straight face, “I assure you, I wouldn’t go to such violent measures. Like I said, I was simply-.”

Just then an explosion erupted inside the magistrate’s building, causing a small fire to break out. The Hojo unit and Mitsuhide turned their direction to the source of the explosion, before everyone from the former silently judged Mitsuhide with dark, inexpressive, sharp, shaming eyes.

“…I didn’t do it… Don’t diss me…” said Mitsuhide softly to Ujiyasu.

“On second thought….” Oichi prepared to crack her fists, prompting Ujiyasu to slowly push Mitsuhide away.

Before any fists flew to anyone’s face, the guards had surrounded the five present, with some of them sporting an afro and burnt clothes. “Stop right where you are!”

“All of you will have to come with us!” Another one roughly shouted.

Gesturing his hands in front of him, Xu Shu shakenly said to the guards, “P-Please wait! W-We’re not criminals!”

“That is correct!” added Mitsuhide. “I was only passing by for a stro- Ouch!”

“Shut up! You’re just making things worse!” The Warlord angrily said after punching his old friend on the head.

What Ujiyasu said and how he behaved towards Mitsuhide was suspicious for the guards, they thought that he was a fellow crony and involved with the explosion in the magistrate’s office. Noticing Oichi looking around as if worried and Yinping who seemed clueless at what was going on and also carrying her heavy looking rod and balls, the guards quickly concluded the men were also kidnappers forcing the women to do their work. With the sound of iron against their sheath, they prepared to charge towards the three.

“Wait! Why are you attacking us?!” Ujiyasu frantically asked the charging guards to no avail. “Didn’t you hear the nervous boy?! We were actually trying to help you!”

“Everyone, get back! Me and sis will try to take care of this!” Yinping braced herself to hit the incoming guards on their head.

“No don’t do that, Yinping! We could be charged for resisting arrest when you hit them!” said Xu Shu as he backed to Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide’s position in a panic.

“Yeah but nobody touches you as long as I’m here! Come get some!” Oichi boldly charged to an unwitting guard with a yell. Thinking it was safe now that the older woman made her move, Yinping followed by blowing a gust with her weapon to the other guards.

“Wha-?! Why’re you repeating history?!” yelled Ujiyasu to Oichi as a guard landed near him with a sole mark on his face. “Remember what happened last time you tried being a hero?!”

As Ujiyasu moved to restrain both Oichi and Yinping, futilely, Mitsuhide noticed a shine from a tower in the distance. Realizing what it could be, he was about to call his old friend and the others to duck before one of Ujiyasu’s bombs fell from his mantel as he was accidentally hit by Yinping’s swing.

“You’re well prepared as always…” he muttered before picking the bomb up.

“Huh,” As Ujiyasu got up, Mitsuhide had just thrown the bomb to the distance. “Gah! What’re you doing with that?!”

**BOOF!**

The explosion stunned everyone present except Mitsuhide and the blue smoke that appeared forced them into a coughing fit. Mitsuhide quickly made his escape from the area, yet not before he yelled out to Ujiyasu, “Follow me, Ujiyasu! I’m right here!”

“Urgh…Guh…” The Warlord noticed the long-haired swordsman waving his hand behind the distracted guards. “Hey! Where do you think you’re going?!” He got up to chase after Mitsuhide, while also pointing how moronic for the latter to give out his position by saying he was there.

Yinping was the first after Ujiyasu to recover, only to notice that he already left to chase after the suspicious swordsman “Ah, Papa! Come on everyone! We have to help Papa after that weird man!”

Oichi nodded as she stopped coughing, and began to run after Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide with Yinping, not before taking Xu Shu by his arm and tugged him along.

“Stop! With that smoke bomb and beating, you are clearly in cohorts with the suspect!” One of the guards shouted as he also recovered.

“WE’RE REALLY SORRY!! I SWEAR WE’RE NOT CRIMINALS!!” apologetically shouted Xu Shu in the distance.

Unconvinced from his sorry, shrill shouting, the guards gave chase to their suspects. What none of them noticed was that the smoke bomb exploded in reaction to a gun fire from a watchtower in a distance.

* * *

 

“Tsk! Didn’t think that was gonna happen,” A rugged man with a tied-to-the-back brown hair in green trench coat cursed under his breath as he pulled his eye away from the finder of his musket. “I gotta follow the target before he gets away!” Picking up his musket, he prepared to descend from the tower, before suddenly,

“Yo!” A young-looking man with a rather messy black hair hidden under his large yellow hat flew in from the tower’s outlook, aiming his feet at the mercenary’s head. “Heads up, busy body mercenary!”

“Geeh! Wha-!” He ducked, narrowly dodging the kick. “Stop doing that!” The mercenary stopped to get up from the ground before angrily to the surprise visitor. “Just because you have that flying disc of yours with you, doesn’t mean you can just sneak up out of nowhere like that, Hanbei!”

The recently landed young man in yellow robes, Hanbei, scratched his nose and looked at the mercenary rather disappointedly. “Come on now, Magoichi… At least it was no bazooka or anything explosive… For now…”

The mercenary, Magoichi, sighed exasperatedly. “You ought to think about yours- Wait!” He jolted. “You’re planning to fire what at me?!”

“Of course not. I’m no sadist blonde.” Hanbei waved his hands back and forth.

“Huh… Alright then…” Magoichi absent-mindedly scratched his head. “Guh! I’m not supposed to be talking to you now! I gotta get to another spot pronto!” He rushed to descend the tower but was stopped again by Hanbei.

“What’s all the rush? It’s not like anyone especially dangerous is on the loose.”

“Oi, the magistrate’s office just exploded… Aren’t you supposed to be bothered by that, prefect’s adjutant?” Before actually leaving to continue his mission, he then informed Hanbei what was needed to know, “Anyways, I was called by your head prefect to hunt down that suspected rebel. But it looks like he brought his cronies to stir up more trouble.”

“Right, when the boss said ‘hunt down’ I don’t think he means that literally… And also you mean the guys following the suspect, huh?”

“Yeah… And they got a pretty lady with them too… She was struggling hard to get away from them …”

Hanbei raised his fingers before pointing out, “Uh… Last time I checked from sky patrol, she was beating up our guards, not the suspect. I think the guy she was dragging was the one kidnapped.”

Selectively not hearing the last detail from Hanbei, Magoichi made his leave not before declaring to his musket, “Don’t worry... Once I got someone in my sights, there’s no escape.”

Left alone in the tower, Hanbei stretched his arms to his back and sighed to himself. “Magoichi sure is uptight when it comes to work and women… So much so that I have to tell that to no one in particular...” He let out another relieved sigh as he relaxed his arms again. “But I guess I know where he got his traits. I just wish he just remembers that he’s not exactly free to do whatever he thinks is right…”

Pulling out a receiver from his robes, he calmly ordered to the other end, “The guards are moving slightly quicker than planned; block all the points in the commercial area like I told you, right now,” Hanbei paused as the other end was asking for an assurance. “Yup, they’ll definitely go there. Uh-huh… Position them there, right… Also make sure our helping hand doesn’t miss his aim.”

With a mixed with static voice because of the reception, the two ended their conversation and Hanbei put back his receiver back to the pocket of his robe. “Now that the stage is being set, I wanna go and take a nap now… But I guess I should do my part with those nosy people…”

Snapping his fingers as he came to a decision, and a plan, Hanbei clicked on the handle of his disc, letting out bladed propellers before flying to the direction of Odawara’s commercial district.

* * *

 

As he reached the commercial area where tall buildings dominated the landscape, Mitsuhide swiftly retreated to a conveniently found pathway, followed by Ujiyasu after they made their way from the crowds.

“Hmm… We should be safe here…” Mitsuhide then noticed that Ujiyasu’s ‘family’ had not arrived yet. Taking a quick peek to the streets, he noticed the long-haired, heavy lifting girl was looking for him and Ujiyasu, along with the rather violent young mistress and the young man in white-green coat. “Ah, please come this way! We’re over here!” He waved his hands around while calling them.

Shocked from his stupid recklessness, Ujiyasu quickly pulled Mitsuhide’s hands down while also covering his mouth, causing him to muffle. “You moron, you’re being chased! Don’t attract attention!”

As Ujiyasu finished with impatiently reminding Mitsuhide of his situation, Yinping and the others had found them and headed their way.

“Aha! Got you now, weird criminal-like sword person!” Yinping tackled Mitsuhide to the ground, along with the irately reminding Ujiyasu behind him.

“You’re a natural helper, Yinping!” said Oichi, “Now let’s show him to the guards and-.”

“Milady, please remember the guards are after us too!” After a light sigh and with a lot of questions in his head, Xu Shu then turned to Mitsuhide and said, “I’m sorry but I also find it strange that you’d let us find you. I mean, our job is to investigate you…”

“Don’t forget capturing him too.” added Oichi.

“Forgive me milady, but I don’t think Mistress Aya said that if I remember correctly…” Sticking to the mission, Xu Shu continued to question Mitsuhide, “You revealed yourself you were on an espionage mission, yet you also said that you are Lord Ujiyasu’s comrade? Just who are you…?”

Just as Mitsuhide, along with Yinping, was pushed away by Ujiyasu, he stood up and cleared his throat. “I’m an honest man – I will answer all what’s needed to know of me.” Before he began to tell about himself, he turned his direction for a bit to Ujiyasu, who was roughly lighting his pipe as he looked the other way. “At first, allow me to properly restart the introduction,” He bowed deeply to the point of kissing the ground, surprising everyone with his extreme formality. “My name is Mitsuhide Akechi, the head of the Akechi warrior clan.”

“A-ke-chi?” Yinping repeated. “What’s that?”

Lightly gasping as he faced the three from the ground, Mitsuhide cleared his throat again as he stood back up. “Ah, yes… I suppose this would lead me to my relation with your father,” Ujiyasu was heard coughing before Mitsuhide continued. “The Akechi and Hojo, two clans renowned for their warrior lineage, were allied with one another during the war. You see, your father and I have been fighting the same battle, sharing our vision alongside other comrades of ours.” Mitsuhide’s tone had been pleasant and nostalgic as he recounted the past.

“A-An alliance with a common goal then?” Xu Shu slowly said as he noticed his lord was seemingly turning deaf ears to the whole story.

“Wow, that’s great! That means, you really are just a weird guy than anything else,” said Yinping. “You’re still sharing the same belief and goals then, right? I mean anyone who’s friends with someone as kind as Papa has a good goal, right?”

Mitsuhide was slightly stunned at how Yinping casually addressed him as weird, but he forced a smile to answer Yinping’s innocuous questions. “I suppose I can say we still do share same peaceful goal, even after the war is over, don’t we, Ujiyasu?” His old friend just waved his hand in response without looking back to Mitsuhide. “Hehe… The usual wordless answer, I see.”

Oichi, who had been conflicted with Mitsuhide’s story and his actions so far, stepped in. “This doesn’t make your motive clear though. If you, Akechi Lord I presume, are still an ally of Hojo, then why would you admit you’re here on an espionage mission? You blowing up the magistrate’s office made me think you might be lying about your alliance to be honest.”

Mitsuhide’s brows lowered from Oichi’s accusing tone and the following agreement between Yinping and Xu Shu as they were reminded by her. “The explosion of the magistrate’s office wasn’t my doing. I promise you…”

“Huh…” The young mistress was still unconvinced on that matter, but she decided to change the subject. “Fine, that leaves the espionage then.”

Hearing how forceful Oichi’s questions became – about Mitsuhide’s motives, the credibility of his story, and especially her question on who sent him was unusually sharp in her fake friendly voice – and with Xu Shu’s usual attempt to restrain her as she did not give Mitsuhide a chance to speak anyways, Ujiyasu decided to come in between them. “Sorry, but let’s just stop the detective interrogation here. We don’t have a tranquilized mustached guy to reveal everything anyway.”

“What tranquilized mustached guy…” said Xu Shu confused and dryly.

“Well we have a mustached guy with us. All we need to do is tranquilize him,” said Oichi with feigned cheerfulness. “Come on you two, let’s do it.”

“Preferably black haired mustache guy with his own detective agency! And I don’t think the War God girl understood what tranquilizing means!” The casual mentioning of War God from Ujiyasu surprised Mitsuhide.

“Achieving nirvana or moksha? We’re enlightening Papa?”

“Uh, no! Out of all things you know, that’s not right! But most importantly, no one’s tranquilizing anyone!” yelled Xu Shu.

As the others were explaining a new word to Yinping, which missed Xu Shu’s point, Mitsuhide took this chance to speak with Ujiyasu, who was rubbing his head in exasperation. “You’d need a bowtie and a matching voice to do that.”

“Let’s forget about the detective thing, alright? I know what you’re trying to do here…” said Ujiyasu rather seriously.

“Hmph… I expected you would catch on quickly, my friend.” Mitsuhide responded with the same tone.

“Say what you want, but I ain’t interested in joining your battle. You and I both know that you’re not welcomed in this place anymore as long as you’re still with that nut job.” He blew a smoke from his pipe.

“How could you say that?!” Mitsuhide slightly raised his voice, though it was drowned by Xu Shu’s coincidental shouting that tranquilizing was unethical. “We have a noble goal of reclaiming the former days where we are free as humans! The mystics fail in their role as our self-proclaimed protector! Surely, you understand that?! You, I and him… We share the same vision...”

“Shared, not share. Like I said, I ain’t interested in fighting. I don’t tell you how to live your life, so don’t tell me how to live mine, got that Mitsuhide?” After blowing another smoke from his pipe, Ujiyasu continued, “It’s been awhile since we’ve been hiding here. The guards must’ve lost you. Now get out of here before the other idiot of ours finds you.” Extinguishing the remaining light by hitting the pipe to the sole of his shoe, he turned to Xu Shu and the others. “Yo, we’re done here. I’ll get us to a tranquilizing Zen garden if the War God girl still doesn’t get it.”

“Eh? What do you mean by we’re done, Lord Ujiyasu?”

“What do you mean what do I mean? We’re done investigating like we’re told.”

The Hojo unit was preparing to leave back into the crowded areas of the district, and despite Xu Shu’s protest for a clearer answer, Oichi’s insistence to keep questioning Mitsuhide, and Yinping claiming she understood tranquilizing already, Ujiyasu kept his pace and assured them that there was nothing else to do.

Still not satisfied with Ujiyasu’s answer, Mitsuhide was about to call out his name, before a human shadow with a propeller on its hand casted above their heads.

“I found the culprit! I knew he’d hide here!” The shadow cheerfully pointed at Mitsuhide.

Everyone gawked with a raised brow at the sight of a young man in yellow hanging to a disk that let out an audible sound from the propellers as it spun.

“For a second there, I thought that was a robot cat from the future.” said Ujiyasu rather inattentively.

“M-My lord.... Judging from his uniform, h-he might be…!” Xu Shu froze in place as he assumed the young man who was landing to the ground with a light grunt.

“It’s a robot boy from the future!” yelled Yinping heartily as she pointed.

“You morons! There’s no such thing as robot whatever from the future!” The panicked young man smacked his hands to Ujiyasu’s and Yinping’s chest.

The yellow-clothed young man’s eyes narrowed sharply to their direction, especially the long-haired girl in green for her slip-up, causing the younger man to tense. “Heh… I was thinking you people are innocent…” He walked closer to them, closing in specifically on the girl. “But then I remembered, we have a rule for wannabe vigilantes that obstruct Odawara prefect’s authority…” None of his previous happy voice was heard.

Xu Shu choked on his own spit, seeing that his assumptions were true: The person in front of him was a high authority in Odawara, one that had a connection to the prefect! He quickly shuffled his gaze to Yinping who was feeling rather disturbed by the possible prefect’s stabbing stare, then to Oichi who showed a displeased complexion behind her fake smile, before finally to Ujiyasu who Xu Shu thought to think the same thing of the current situation, judging from his awkward expression.

“L-Lord Ujiyasu, w-what do we do now?! This person is obviously the prefect or someone involved with him!” Despite not being indoor, he hysterically whisper-shouted.

“C-Calm down, you idiot… We’re no vigilante, so as long as no one say-.”

“You know you have no right to accuse us like that,” A feminine, feigned friendly voice was heard. “We were requested by people way more important than you can imagine to take matters in our own hands, I tell you.”

“Sis is right! Now creepy staring boy from the future can just go and leave that weird man to us!”

_THEY OFFEND SOMEONE IN MORE THAN ONE WAY!!_

Buddha did not smile to the two men again that day.

Ujiyasu and Xu Shu braced themselves, biting their lips, as the assumed prefect took out his receiver, slowly closing its distance to his mouth. Pressing the button, he began to speak,

“Hanbei Takenaka here. Send the troops to my location now, the suspect and his cohorts are found.”

With facing questioning and jail time from yet another misunderstanding being the last on his want-list, Ujiyasu discreetly tried to sneak away, hands front and on tippy toes, while the young prefect, was busy with his orders. Taking a quick look behind him, he was stupidly stunned to see his followers were letting him finish. And apparently Mitsuhide had already tip-toed on the other way without anyone realizing. Somehow.

“YOU COWARD!!” Mitsuhide quickly made a sprint as Ujiyasu angrily shouted, “DON’T LEAVE US WITH YOUR MESS!!” He dashed pass everyone to the one way direction of the pathway, leaving a wind.

“YOU BASTARD!! DON’T DITCH US WITH A MESS!!” Oichi quickly followed after rolling her sleeves.

Yinping and Xu Shu shielded their eyes from the dusts that came along with the strong winds. The former called after Ujiyasu and Oichi with their easier-for-her names. Just before she took off, she turned behind to the hatted boy and said, “Just so you know, we’re the good vegetablanties or whatever you just say!”

Leaving only Xu Shu alone in the dust, literally, as the speed from Yinping’s dash left the pathway barren, he took a side glance to the assumed prefect who was clearing his throat as he waited for an answer.

“Uh… I’m just gonna go after them now… S-Since that’s what we’ve been doing…” He slowly walked to the path where the others went, with him still facing Hanbei. “So please… despite all this don’t arrest us, for we are not criminals…”

With a deep bow, he followed after the others - his nervous, polite demeanor suddenly replaced with an angry, shrill outburst as he yelled after all of their names and called them all out for their hypocrisy, with slight cursing that made people gasp in the middle of it all.

Hanbei chalked a victory in his head as it all went as planned: Every one of them fell for his fake calling for reinforcements. He prepared to fly off with a smirk, though remembered that being called boy quickly wiped his smirk off into a scowl.

* * *

 

Magoichi picked up his speed, as he rushed through the crowds of the commercial district, rudely shoving away people too stubborn to move.

“Make way! Mercenary hired by prefect coming through! Step aside! I have work to do here!”

As he was busy clearing his path, he noticed that his target was running on the other side of his position, followed by the angry, tall man he saw earlier, followed by the angry young mistress he assumed was kidnapped…

“Hey! Nobody makes a fair lady run and shout like that!” With that declaration, he changed direction and decided to hunt his target directly, ignoring the speeding little girl with huge balls and the cursing young man behind them.

The chase went on, with silly outdated trumpets presumably playing across Odawara, until Mitsuhide looked around for a vehicle to use. A moped parked among cars caught his attention and he hesitated for a bit.

“Mitsuhide! What’re you planning to do, huh?!”

With Ujiyasu’s rough shouting heard, Mitsuhide quickly took out a piece of paper and pen that were conveniently in his pocket and wrote a quick note to the moped’s possible owner. After putting his finished note to the parking meter next to the moped, Mitsuhide quickly rode the moped and took off, not before remembering safety first and put on a helmet that came with the moped.

“Hah… Forgive me for taking such drastic measures…” He spoke to nobody in particular as he zig-zagged across the traffic in Odawara.

Rushing to his planned escape point, he drove on the opposite lane of the road, swerving left and right to avoid incoming traffic as they honked their horns.

“HEY!! WHAT’S THE BIG IDEA?!” One driver yelled out as Mitsuhide passed him. He widened his eyes when he noticed a man was hanging on the back of the moped, hysterically running to keep up with the speeding vehicle. “WHA?! TH-THERE’S SOMEONE HANGING ONTO YOUR BIKE!”

Catching the last shout, Mitsuhide turned his head around to notice Ujiyasu hanging on using his cane as an extension, while screaming at the top of his lungs that would make opera singers jealous. “Oh, Ujiyasu! I didn’t know you caught up!”

“Stop the airhead crap and slow this thing down!”

“Sorry, but I can’t! If I slow down then-.”

“STOP RIGHT THERE!! An overbearing shout came from a car that sped to their side. The car opened its window, revealing a frightened driver and Oichi on the passenger seat, with her fist right above the driver’s head. “Just where do you think you’re going?! You have to face the music for your actions, you know!” She took out a piece of paper and showed it to Mitsuhide and Ujiyasu.  “Especially that you didn’t sign the note saying ‘I will replace your moped. Forgive me.’. In other words, without proper procedure for borrowing, you’re stealing!”

“Uh miss… w-where are we going exact- Hii!!”

“Just keep following these two! If you don’t do that, I’ll punch you flatter than the shape of the earth!” She threatened the driver.

“W-WHA-JEJA-WHAT?! You’re hijacking a car! That’s even worse than stealing, you idiot! Also someone actually watched the kid friendly dub?!” Ujiyasu yelled.

“It’s hitchhiking! There’s a difference!” She insisted.

“You’re pretty mean, you know that?!” The Warlord shouted further before returning to Mitsuhide. “Anyways, slow down and let me ride on the moped! My legs can’t keep this up!”

Suddenly, a loud gunshot was heard that caused everyone present to yelp.

“Heh, I can help you with that. It just makes it easier for me to get you too.”

A bus going on a not necessarily ludicrous speed appeared near them, with the mercenary on top of it, reloading his musket. Somehow managing to keep his balance while doing so. With a smug grin, he locked his sights again to the wheels of Mitsuhide’s moped, shocking the two men who were riding, or in the other man’s case clinging desperately on it as the mercenary was about to pull the trigger after murmuring his chilling parting words.

“LORD UJIYASU!” A shrill call shocked the mercenary’s shot to a miss. Suddenly the window of the bus slid open, revealing to everyone Xu Shu was riding as a passenger. “I had to take the bus to catch up with everyone! Stop it, all of this before someone does something drastic!”

“Everyone is already doing something drastic here, you idiot! Didn’t you hear that gunshot from above you for one?!” As he angrily pointed the situation out, he faced his front only to see Mitsuhide was driving through a promenade filled with people and colorful crates. “AAAHHH!!! MITSUHIDE, DON’T HIT THAT OLD LADY!! AND – AH! DON’T GET ME NEAR THAT MANURE CART THERE EITHER! NOT AGAIN!!”

While Ujiyasu was screaming for his life, and hygiene, along with the panicking people, Oichi kept harshly demanding her driver to keep speeding in order to catch up with the moped in front of them. “Keep flooring it! If they get away then none of us here will hear the end of it!”

“But miss th-.”

“NONE OF US I SAY!!” After gritting her teeth to the driver, they had just barely noticed that they were about to crash into one of the colorful crates. “Whoa! Look out!”

It was a miracle that everyone in the promenade retreated safely from the whole action, but Xu Shu still could not contain his gasps and shocks for every property damage dealt as he saw everything from the seats. He rushed to the driver and begged “Sir, could you please slow down!? Is this promenade even part of the bus route?!” However, the bus driver kept going as they crashed into a crate. “I’m sorry sir, but… please slow-.”

“No talking to the bus driver while he’s on duty!” The bus driver angrily pointed to a sticker telling so above him.

“BUT YOU JUST CRASHED INTO SOMETHING AND ENDANGERING LIVES JUST NOW!” Xu Shu heaved a worried and exasperated breath until a slot-like jingle ringed in his ears. He opened the window and looked up to the mercenary on top of the bus. “Wait! What in Nirvana’s name is that?!” He pointed at a green shell the mercenary was holding.

“Tsk… I could’ve gotten the red shell,” Seemingly ignoring Xu Shu’s protest, he complained. “Ah well, it’s not like I can’t aim this at them, heh.” He aimed the shell towards the moped as his hand stretched back, preparing to throw.

“WHY ARE YOU PLANNING TO THROW A TURTLE SHELL?! Actually… WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?!”

Xu Shu missed the same jingle as he was occupied with the turtle shell, until suddenly a bomb with eyes and a crank on its back bumped onto his head. Catching it with his hands, he blankly examined it until he realized it was flashing red.

**BOOM!!**

The bomb exploded, flipping the bus with it, and the prefect adjutant with his flying disc flew by not long after.

“Ah, Magoichi! I swear I didn’t see you there. That bomb was for the suspect really,” He casually faced behind as he kept flying. “Anyways, I’ll see you later!”

As soon as he kept flying away, the bus landed, flipping on the ground for a bit before speeding as if nothing happened. Magoichi, amazingly still standing on the bus, examined his hand and saw his green shell nowhere. Veins clicked on his head as he caught hold of the situation, he then yelled towards his aggressor, “Oi! You definitely did that on purpose! Oi, Hanbei!”

Gradually becoming suspicious of Hanbei’s tricks, he angrily clicked his tongue and stomped the roof of the bus. “Come on, there’s another crate there! Don’t let them get it first!”

Xu Shu, who was getting increasingly confused and irritated - especially with how the bus was still intact from the explosion - yelled, “Is that where the shell and bomb came from?! What kind of promenade would have those things lying around in the first place?! This isn’t one of those games my lord plays!” He turned to the bus driver after his frenzy, seeing the latter drove according to the person on the roof’s orders. “And didn’t you say no one’s allowed to talk to you while you’re driving?! The guy above stomped the bus’s roof for goodness sake!”

Hoping to snap everyone out of their stupidity, Xu Shu popped out of the window again. Taking an extremely deep breath, he concentrated his mind. His thoughts gathered, and the appropriate comment in mind, he opened his mouth…

And a red shell hit the back of the bus, causing it to spin wildly, with a shrill scream from the passenger seats.

The car Oichi hitchjacked zoomed past after picking up a red mushroom with eyes on the ground. She peeked out of the car window with an angry glare and scowl, and two red shells cuddled on her arms.

Hanbei cranked his neck to see the woman in pink dress preparing to throw one red shell by swinging her arms in a circular motion, becoming faster after each spin. “Ah, wait a minute! That’s a red shell! It’s gonna-!”

The red shell came flying towards Hanbei at a frightening velocity before he managed to finish. He narrowly dodged as he was forced to land sloppily on his feet to recover, as the other pursuers passed him. “Hey! That wasn’t part of the plan!” He protested before flying back again.

Meanwhile, Oichi’s car closed in on Mitsuhide and Ujiyasu’s moped, and with eyes dead set on the wheels, she peered out for her attack.

“With this – BAM! You will be one with the flower petals in spring…”

Ujiyasu, who had just managed to get on the passenger seat, heard the words Oichi chanted. “What flower petals?! Are you seriously going that route, oi?!” With a powerful, scarily determined shout from her, the shell flung to their direction. “Gyeeeheeh!! She’s serious!” He frantically turned to Mitsuhide. “Drift! Drive along the wall! Anything to make that thing miss!”

“Drift? Can we do that in Odawara? I thought it’s more of an Edo style than anything…” As Mitsuhide pondered to himself, the whooshing sound of the shell was getting louder as it was getting nearer and nearer.

“MITSUHIDE!! DO SOMETHING!!”

“Oh yes, I got three bananas from a crate we passed through,” He showed Ujiyasu what he actually got the whole time they were racing through the promenade. “But sadly I only got peels… Someone must’ve eaten them first…”

“THAT!!” Ujiyasu explosively pointed before taking the banana peels.

Taking one of the peels, he extended his hand close to the back wheel of the moped. He closed his eyes, clenched his teeth as the shell came dangerously close.

“WHAT?!” Everyone behind Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide screamed as the shell snapped against the banana, except Xu Shu who had saner things in his mind.

“Ah… You really do still have your wits, Ujiyasu. I’m pleased to see that.” Mitsuhide clapped his hands as he faced Ujiyasu.

“Keep driving and mind the road, you idiot!”

“Tsk! To think a banana peel can withstand a flying shell!” lamented Oichi.

“Of course not! Neither banana peels nor turtle shells work like that in any reality!” Xu Shu yelled from the bus.

Magoichi snapped his fingers in disappointment, seeing the shell tactic would not work on the escaping suspects. But it quickly changed when he realized after hearing the jingle from his bus’s recent crashed crate, that the same bomb Hanbei had used was in his hands.

“This is where you get off, for real!” Before he threw the bomb, he winked to the beautiful woman whose car was besides his bus. “Don’t worry my fair lady, I’ll get you out of your ordeal.”

With his words, a red shell was about to fly to his face. Luckily Xu Shu stepped in between.

“LORD UJIYASU, THE GUY ON THE BUS IS FLIRTING WITH MILADY! AND HE’S ABOUT TO THROW A BOMB AT YOUR DIRECTION!!”

“Hey, shut up! You almost startled me again!” Magoichi angrily stomped at the roof of the bus.

“Wuaah…. Don’t you think you’re going overboard by throwing a bomb at them, Magoichi?” Hanbei caught up, flying near Magoichi’s bus. “I’m gonna charge you for that, you know?”

“I don’t wanna hear that from someone who almost killed me with a bomb himself!!” Magoichi fumingly concentrated back to his target. Trying to ignore his own angry emotion from the comments he received, he aimed according to his calculations, and with a powerful throw, he declared, “You’re finished, you criminals!!”

The bomb leapt high, passing over Mitsuhide’s and Ujiyasu’s head. Another victory smirk appeared on Magoichi’s face as the bomb landed on the narrowing road where it was only possible for one vehicle to pass on its lane.

Xu Shu realized what the mercenary was planning, ignoring that any sort of explosions would destroy the premises if reality should ensue but in this case probably would not, and he immediately warned his lord, “If you go at this rate then…!”

Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide heard Xu Shu’s indirect warning, and looked front only to see the bomb that flew by was not far and flashing red.

“Wah! It’s going to explode, Ujiyasu!” Mitsuhide reflexively reached the brakes.

But before a dramatic screech was heard, Ujiyasu restrained him. “You moron! If you stop, they’re gonna catch you!”

“I-I suppose…” Mitsuhide let his hands off the breaks. “Then how are we going to…”

“Stop saying anything! I’m trying to think!”

As Ujiyasu cupped his chin and grumbled for an answer, Mitsuhide noticed the remaining banana peels he was holding. Sharpening his gaze as he found a solution, Mitsuhide took one of the bananas as how Ujiyasu did to him.

“Of course! Bananas are the answer to our problems!” He muttered as he held it tight.

“Huh?! What out of context crap are you talking about?! And how’s that gonna help us?!”

“Hmm… You have always played defense, Ujiyasu…” Confidently throwing the banana peel near the blinking bomb’s position, Mitsuhide picked up speed after that, shocking Ujiyasu and the others, minus the bus driver, at Mitsuhide’s risky action. “I, however, face forward with my sound judgement!”

Just before the bomb exploded, the front tire of the moped made contact with the slippery banana peel…

“Huh?!” Magoichi could not believe his eyes. Mitsuhide and Ujiyasu continued forward after only spinning out of control for a bit. “How did they not flip to the air from that explosion?!”

“You’re saying like flipping from explosion is normal! I’m explodingly flipped from how everyone is being reckless and dumb today!” Xu Shu threw a tantrum. “And doesn’t anyone find it weird how banana peels are the solution for everything so far!?”

“I thought that out suspects are rather elusively smart…” Hanbei commented as he was floating.

“What do you mean by that? It’s not like they’re getting away purely by their wits rather because physics suddenly doesn’t work… Like how all of us just squished through that tiny road we just passed while keeping our speed.” Xu Shu exasperatedly pointed out.

As Xu Shu finished, a jingle was heard. It was a different jingle as if something invincible was speeding their way, mowing every single thing unfortunate enough that came to contact with it.

And sure enough, when everyone, minus the bus driver, turned their heads behind, Yinping was catching up to them, using her God of War running skills. With flashing colors that obstructed her face, she waved her free hand happily as a fire hydrant instantly popped away with a dramatic bang when she passed through it.

“Papa, Xu Shu, Sis!! I’m here to help you and that weird guy!” A mailbox flew to the sky as she also ran past it.

“No you won’t! At least not while you give us the touch of thrown-into-the-horizon-and-make-us-fall-behind-to-last-place while you’re in that state!” Ujiyasu angrily yelled to her.

“S-She has star power!”

Ujiyasu immediately bonked Mitsuhide’s helmet. “Don’t give it away, you idiot!”

As the jingle kept going, Yinping effortlessly caught up to the other pursuers, before apologizing to her family unit, “Sorry I got lost everyone! But I’m here to do my best to make up for my not being there from the past few paragraphs thing!”

She noticed the boy who was floating near the bus. Narrowing her eyes and tightening her forehead, she pointed her finger at him. “You! You’re the one that’s making everything complicated!” She swung her rod and balls, preparing herself into a stance as she kept running. “I won’t let you ruin everyone’s effort today!”

“Oh, so you’re that thick-skinned girl… Didn’t notice from the seizures you’re inducing…” Hanbei’s voice turned darker as if he slightly snapped.

Taking the flying boy’s words as a challenge, Yinping said, “I don’t really know what that means, but I have a pretty tough skin!”

“Oi, Hanbei! Why’re you picking a fight with a little girl?! A girl that runs quick and has balls of steel…?”  Magoichi, rather horrified, looked at Hanbei as he slowly continued, “Don’t tell me…” Coming to a realization from Hanbei’s lack of response, he tried to persuade him off, “Hanbei! It’s not worth it just because she said ‘that’! The suspects are more trouble! Oi!”

“Wait, they’re going to what?! Yinping, don’t do this! Also thick-skinned doesn’t mean what you think you mean!” Xu Shu also persuaded and lectured.

But all the throat-drying yelling came into waste. With the rather catchy jingle that came from Yinping ringing, she let out a shout as she charged forward.

Xu Shu and Magoichi sweated profusely as Yinping just caused a parking meter to fly as she ran along the bus.

“Y-Yinping! Listen to me! Don’t make a scene worse than it already is! For our sake!”

“Hanbei! Listen to yourself! You’re gonna fight a prepubescent girl with huge balls! That totally sounded wrong but… Hanbei!”

The tiny edge of Yinping’s rod made contact with the bus… right when the jingle stopped along with the flashing colors on Yinping.

“Hey! What happened?” Yinping wondered aloud. “I lost my pretty colors…”

The men on the bus, minus the bus driver, let out a sigh of relief as they luckily were not blasted into space….

“But I won’t give up until I stop you!”

Until Yinping picked up the bus with her own hands, preparing to throw it.

“Hey! That’s not fair!” Hanbei yelled, “But if that’s how you want to play then…”

“O-Oi, oi! You’re not seriously letting her do this right?!” Magoichi struggled to keep balance. “I mean, I’m still on it!”

Hearing the sudden uproar among his pursuers, Mitsuhide reflexively faced back again, only to see the bus about to be thrown at his direction. “Oh…! Ujiyasu, look behind us!”

“Huh?! Didn’t I tell you to keep your eye on-.” His reminder was cut by Xu Shu’s distressed call,

“My lord! Milady! Please do something!”

Ujiyasu and Oichi gasped after Xu Shu’s name after seeing the lifted bus for themselves.

She demanded her driver, “Get closer to the girl with the bus,” Before the driver could say anything, she firmly yelled further, “Just do it! No talking back!”

As soon the car neared towards the demanded position, Oichi quickly climbed up to the top of the car, ignoring the danger from the high speed and the plea from the driver.

Ujiyasu stood up from his seat, causing Mitsuhide to almost lose balance on his moped.

“Ujiyasu? It’s dangerous for people to stand on a moving vehicle like that…!”

“Just keep driving. I’ll take responsibility for all of this.”

The impatient, screaming-for-his-life outlook was completely gone on Ujiyasu – it was changed into a calm, serious face as the winds pattered his hanging haori and hair. Mitsuhide, trusting his old friend with a confident smile, focused yet again on his road.

“YOU MORONS!!”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!!”

Ujiyasu and Oichi’s voice roared across the area, stopping the uproar of the chase. Yinping relaxed her grip on the bus, hearing her guardian’s stern yell.

“Geez… I didn’t wanna do that…” The Warlord irritatingly rubbed his throat. He took a quick glance towards Oichi, who gave him a quick nod that signaled him to proceed, “Look around us for a bit. Bunch of idiots, and a hitchhiker…” He subtly nodded Oichi to put the remaining shell down. “And you justify all of this physics-defying destruction just to capture one guy. Don’t be so narrow-sighted that you don’t think what you’re doing isn’t causing distress to those around you and those who got involved unwillingly! Like that bus driver over there!” He pointed his cane at him, who was still as undisturbed as ever as he kept driving.

“He doesn’t seem so distressed to me…” Hanbei tried to examine the bus driver closely.

“What’re you talking about?! Of course he is! He’s chanting in his mind right now, ‘Just keep driving, just keep driving…’”

“No talking about the bus driver when he’s driving!” The bus driver yelled in his unchanging stern voice.

“Uh… sorry…” Ujiyasu then continued, “But realize what you’re all doing now. All this chasing, fighting, and crap don’t do anyone any favor – It doesn’t help anyone.”

The last simple sentence made Yinping realize what she was about to do. Looking at Xu Shu who was rather terrified of the situation, a feeling of guilt swelled within her as she was about to put the bus down.

“Well… That’s good and all…” Hanbei said, “But we’re still going to capture that suspect you’re trying to save here… And seeing all of you broke a lot of law…”

The serious, mentor-like composure of Ujiyasu broke in an instant. “Oh right… Damn… Should’ve thought that far when I tried to teach these morons a lesson…”

“My lord…” Xu Shu quietly laughed in relief as he was seeing Ujiyasu pondering.

During the middle of their lull, a sharp sound was heard, alerting everyone to it.

“Did anyone hear that?” Xu Shu asked from the bus, which everyone managed to catch somehow.

“Yes… And it’s getting louder as if it’s closing on us…” Oichi responded, again thanks to twisted sound physics.

“Ah,” Yinping remembered something. “I was lost trying to find everyone, so I sent a blue shell with wings I found that came with those pretty boxes. But I found everyone first, hehe…”

“Blue…”

“….Shell…?”

Mitsuhide and Ujiyasu followed in an emotionally void tone.

“Oh! There it is now!” Yinping pointed at the incredibly zooming blue blur heading their way.

“And we’re in the most front…”

“Yes we are, Mitsuhide… Yes we are…”

After another three seconds of quietness, panicky screams erupted from the two men on the moped. Despite the incoming blue shell, Mitsuhide could not speed the moped to outrun the shell.

Fearing the incoming explosion, Ujiyasu shakenly asked Mitsuhide, “W-What’s wrong, Mitsuhide?! C-Couldn’t this th-thing g-go faster?!”

“I can’t go anymore faster, Ujiyasu!”

“Why not?!”

“Because we could be fined for speeding if I do that!”

“Are you telling me we’re going less than 50 kilometers per hour throughout that chase?! Besides, we’re already in way bigger trouble than getting a speeding ticket, you idiot!”

With the blue shell hovering near the moped’s position, Yinping returned her grip on the bus again, this time for a better usage according to her assessment.

“Papa!” She yelled out as she picked up the bus on her hand.

“Y-Yinping?!”

“What?! Again?!” The mercenary yelped.

As the bus was lifted from the ground again, Oichi called Xu Shu to jump out to her side, which he narrowly managed as she caught his hand and pulled him.

Not wanting to be admitted into a hospital, Hanbei stopped in one spot, cheerfully waving goodbye to Magoichi as the latter’s hopes of rescue were shattered.

“Hanbei, you bastard! Why didn’t you bail me out of here!”

Just before the frighteningly strong girl took a big swing of the bus to the back, Magoichi spot a conveniently parked car and quickly jumped off to the top of it.

Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide anxiously bit their lip, as they looked up to see that the blue shell was already circling above their head. Ujiyasu closed his eyes, resigning to his spectacularly blue fate, until…

“Don’t worry, Papa! I’ll full swing you to safety!” Yinping shouted as she prepared to swing her baseball bus.

Ujiyasu popped up his eyes at the sight of an incoming, god-knows-how-many-heaps-of-heavy-things-that’ll-hurt-when-it-impacts-on-your-face bus.

“WAI-!”

“HOOWAAA!!!” With Yinping’s powerful swing, the moped pierced through the sky – powered with equally piercing shrieks from its driver and passenger.

Ujiyasu and Mitsuhide kept their pitch as they drifted through the sky. But because of the freefall and screaming, the two did not notice the blue shell was still rocketing towards them. Just before the blue shell was a few distance away, specifically decameters, Ujiyasu quickly grabbed Mitsuhide by the waist and pulled him off to abandon their transport…

**KABOOM!!**

A daylight firework spectacularly appeared across Odawara, but sadly missed by most people as its color was mixed with the clear blue sky. It was a one time event for those who had been following the chase leading to it.

“Ooh... pretty! And Papa’s part of that too!”

From the top of their car, Xu Shu and Oichi looked at the transparent show.

“Oh my… Ujiyasu is one with the stars instead of spring flowers at this rate…”

Turning pale out of worry, Xu Shu called out, “Milady…! That’s a pretty frightening statement! But knowing my lord, he should make it out okay… I mean, no!” Xu Shu reflexively took Oichi’s hand and then Yinping’s as he rushed to the blue shell explosion’s direction. “We have to make sure Lord Ujiyasu is safe! He could be hanging his life on the edge after all that!”

“Aww…. That didn’t work out.” Hanbei lamented nonchalantly.

He then flew to Magoichi, who was clenching his fist in a small temper.

“Damn…! I let ‘em get away!!”

“Aww… Come on, Magoichi. There’s always next time,” Hanbei patted the mercenary on the shoulder.

“You… really have the guts to say that after you left me on the bus, huh?” Magoichi let out a small sigh before muttering, “What am I gonna say to him after all this...?”

Hanbei noticed the anxious tone behind Magoichi’s rather grouchy delivery. Tapping his shoulder again before preparing to fly away, he said, “Just relax. The boss’ll understand – Don’t worry! Anyways, all this pointless chasing made me sleepy, I’m gonna go take a nap. You should do the same thing.”

As Magoichi saw Hanbei flying away and saying he would be seeing the mercenary again whenever the prefect needed him, he sighed again before making his leave. “Just what’re you supposed to do, seriously?”

* * *

 

Mitsuhide observed from one of the commercial district’s skyscraper after miraculously landing there safely from Ujiyasu’s throw. As the sound of midday transparent firework continued, a satisfied smile appeared on his face.

“I knew it. You still haven’t changed a bit, my dear friend. Despite everything, you’d always move to save everyone possible…” He then noticed Ujiyasu hanging on one of the building’s window sill, just as his followers arrived with the young man panicking. “I suppose that’s why your ‘family’ flocks to you. Yes… the kind of person needed for our cause…”

Just before he saw the petite girl shaking the building effectively with her bare hands to bring Ujiyasu down, a small blimp pod arrived for Mitsuhide. After the soldiers that arrived along with the pod bowed to him, Mitsuhide quietly went inside.

“Now to report what I have found to him…”

Still, nobody knew who planted the explosives at the magistrate’s office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Ahaha… who says anything about a new VRD Mort? The box was your reward from me. Anyways, your first day could have been better, but I have prepared everyone dinner for your efforts today. My… Are you all anxious to have a taste of the ##### I made, judging from your crinkled face? Now eat up before it gets cold.”


	13. Sure you can wear a red G-String in public… But why?

After experiencing the adventures she got into, and with permission and blessing from Aya, Oichi decided to open up a flower shop as part of the do-anything business, while the others were off taking requests, or in Ujiyasu’s case requesting five minutes after another five minutes in bed. Using part of her and Xu Shu’s home as the shop, she happily lined up the flowers she had personally grown to be sold. Satisfied with how the products were sorted, and how visually appealing the shop looked as it overlooked the garden she and Xu Shu had worked on, she moved on to the last important step.

“And… There!” Brushing the last stroke on the sign, she placed it in front of the shop. “Open for business!”

Oichi was lucky enough for her first day. She received visits from curious pedestrians, with some of them praising her arrangements as they bought it. It’s only natural was what she said whenever they praised her work.

Her customers was mostly ladies with the same interest with flowers as her, but then a depressed looking man passed by, hanging his eyes over her arranged flowers.

“What beautiful flowers….” The man sighed.

Oichi smiled as she approached the man, who she noticed sported a white, combed to the back pompadour that contrasted his black facial hair. “Do you like flowers too, sir?”

The white haired man snapped out from his thoughts as his eyes met her clear brown eyes and the refreshing smile on her face. The man could feel his burden vanishing away, but it was not enough to energize him as he could only nod weakly as answer.

Feeling sorry, and with no one else but this depressed-looking white-haired man with her, Oichi decided to keep him company. “Sir, from the look of your eyes, it seems that you were just forced to pay alimony. Is that it?”

The man’s face turned red as his eyes widened. Oichi then asked further, “While maybe it’s not my place but please do tell,” She persuaded with a welcoming smile. “I’m here for you with open ears.”

Her assumption was not really spot on, but seeing her beautiful smile and gentle eyes for the second time, he could feel her sincerity for his plight.

“It was…. a painful one-sided love all along…” He started to open up, “I had given her my all, my everything just for her… Yet…”

Oichi gasped. “She wanted more than money for the alimony?!”

“Eh? Uh no… It was never something like that….” The man in gold-cladded armor and red flowing mantle sighed again before slowly saying as he faced one of Oichi’s arrangements, “Tell me… Will I ever recover and stand hard and strong like I always was?”

She felt she understood what was going on even though he was rather vague with his story. Putting an assuring smile as she took the daffodil arrangement from the display, she gently said, “You will erect harder and stronger like a wood in the morning air. And when the time comes,” She faced the man directly into his eyes. “You will bloom again alongside the one person you love most.”

Truth struck the man’s five senses. The clouds within his mind faded away as the flower shop keeper, her soothing voice, her sweet flower scent and her words etched within him. He would rise up. His heart skipped a beat as he swallowed his own saliva.

“Hehe… The golden daffodil suits you well, sir. I can give this one for free just for-.”

“It’s fine….” He shakenly said.

“Pardon me?”

In a split second, the depressed man’s face turned bright as his now brimming eyes looked at her longingly. Taking one of her hands, he got down on one knee and tenderly said, “You will make a fine tigress… Will you take me as the wood to your flowers?”

“Heh?” A sharp, nose-cranked, bewildered cry blurted out from her mouth.

* * *

 

At the dinner table after Xu Shu returned from his training, to unintentionally become a better homemaker and babysitter, he spewed out the tea he just drank as Oichi finished telling him her day.

“Xu Shu! Sensible spittake!” she scolded.

“Ah! Forgive me, milady…” Before he could properly clean the tea puddle on the table with the napkin, he dramatically slammed his napkin-holding hand, nearly splitting the table. “NO! That’s not it!” He jerked his neck hysterically toward his mistress. “Someone wanted to what with you?!”

“Oh that. Well… it was pretty sudden that he went bold like that… I mean, he was rather courteous at first.”

“You didn’t say yes to that, did you? What about Lord Nagamasa…?” Xu Shu’s expression turned sad.

“Hehe…. Don’t worry, Xu Shu. I turned him down, of course,” She collected the scattered plates as she continued, “Still, it was rather surprising… I mean he looked like someone in a lofty position, but then he said something so dirty I just had to teach him a lesson.”

Xu Shu sighed at her last remark. “I wonder what did he say to you, Lady Oichi? However, as long as nothing else happens it’s al-.”

“Lady Oichi! Such a beautiful name for such beauty,” The voice attracted the two’s attention as it came right from the top of the tall tree across. “I didn’t catch your name since you forced your sensitive touch with your foot to my wood! But now since I know, what do you say we talk over dinner?”

Xu Shu could tell who the man was from his boisterously bold attempt, and also from Oichi’s scarily mellow expression in face of it all. It surprised him that it was not a creepy young man with raging hormones; instead it was a charismatic-looking, rather built, middle-aged man. Yet still probably had raging hormones from how he attempted to charm Oichi by trying to pull off a shining teeth smile while folding his arms.

“Come now, Lady Oichi! Welcome me into your beautiful garden where we can-.”

“Hey! Get down from the tree over there! You’re bothering everyone and could possibly fall!” A passerby yelled at him.

The man on the tree looked down to see onlookers gathered – worryingly yet also somehow judgingly looking at him. With the clamors starting, he tried to calm the situation down, saying to the one that yelled at him, “Never worry, good citizen of Odawara, I will not fall! For my lovely lady there told me I had erected stronger than ever! Trust me,” He gave a wide grin and a hearty thumbs-up to the people watching. “For I am completely firm as of tonight!”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY FIRM!! GET DOWN HERE BEFORE YOU BREAK A LEG!”

As the crowds outside her home’s gate was in an uproar, Oichi took a deep breath as she slowly walked to the veranda, undoing one of her sandals. Her companion could only take a few steps out of her way.

Looking back to his lovely lady’s home again, he noticed she came out and gazed at him intensely. “Oh,” He yelped in joy. “Lady Oi-chrrgh!”

Like a gorilla fell by another gorilla in another more original reality, he tumbled hard from the tree with his joyful expression unchanging as the sandal flew back to Oichi’s hand. The crowds went completely silent as they just continued with the rest of their evening.

“So… let’s get cleaning, Xu Shu.” She monotonically said.

“Clean what exactly, milady?”

* * *

 

“Hah? He’s not at work again?”

“Well, the boss came back last night with head trauma. But, before you say anything, he can still miraculously walk and talk like always. Which explains how he ran off somewhere this morning. Again.” Hanbei took a bite from the dango he ordered as he finished explaining to Magoichi.

The mercenary sighed, predicted the reason he was called to Odawara that day. “Fine, I’ll be your momentary assistant for the day. Don’t forget you’re charged extra!”

“Eeeeh? That’s unfair of you, Magoichi! Aren’t we friends?! Gimme a hundred and one percent discount at least!”

In annoyance, Magoichi pushed down the big hat Hanbei was wearing to his eyes. “Hundred and one percent discount, your face! You almost left me for dead the other day,” He then looked up to the sky, saying, “Still, I guess I can make an exception for him. I mean, he’s probably busy doing his thing like always.”

Just right after fixing his hat, Hanbei happily affirmed, “Yup! He’s busy closing the distance with the people! A hardworking guy, right?” Hanbei sprang playfully from the bench of the shop. “Anyways, the job is to go around and inspect the residents. Good luck to you, Magoichi!”

Magoichi grabbed hold of Hanbei’s shoulder, the instant he tried sneaking away. “You… gotta work hard like him too today…”

“Hey… are you suspecting me of something?”

* * *

 

Ujiyasu had a private matter to attend to in a certain train station later in the day, taking Yinping along so that the castle would not have disappeared floors again when he would be back. With a free day on his hands, Xu Shu decided to help Oichi take care of their errands before the flower shop opened.

“That man was shameless…” Xu Shu almost absent-mindedly said as they were on their way to the market.

“Xu Shu! No need to remember a pointless incident with a pointless person,” she scolded. “It’s not like we’re going to see him again anyway, so no need to be so anxious.”

“I’m pretty sure we won’t since he probably landed head first last time…. which is rather too far, milady…”

Arriving at the stand that sells sweet beans, Oichi said to Xu Shu, “It’s a virtuous wife’s duty to stay true to her vows, Xu Shu. He didn’t listen so he got his just desserts. And speaking of desserts,”

She turned to the vendor and kindly said, “10 kilograms worth of adzuki beans, please.”

Dumbfounded but rather intimidated after noticing she tightened her fist to his direction, the vendor confirmed her order and scooped the beans into a case.

“Milady?! Isn’t that too much of sweet beans? We still have to buy other necessities…”

Oichi pouted at Xu Shu’s protest. “Oh come now! The sweeter our dinner tonight, the better. Besides, I need sweets for what happened the past few days. You need it too, right? Ujiyasu has been giving you a hard time, right?”

“W-Well… that’s… I suppose… but-.”

“Then it’s settled. We’re buying 10 kilos of these.”

With her being persistent, Xu Shu gave up on trying to say he could not handle her level of sweetness. His mistress always had an enormous sweet tooth, especially for adzuki. But she seemingly never realized that not everybody had a strong taste bud on the tip of the tongue. He always preferred sour tastes, but he did not want to have his mistress in a worse mood than she was already by reminding her that at that moment.

“Wha-?! Something white is here!” The vendor yelled out after he could not scoop for more beans.

Curious what he meant by that, the two went closer to check, before suddenly a ragged but cheerful face of a man emerged from among the beans. Xu Shu and Oichi yelped in surprise as they realized it was the same man from last evening.

Letting out a flirty chuckle, he gestured his face for her to look on his left.

Oichi and Xu Shu, and the vendor, silently did as he gestured, noticing colored beans were mixed in another pile to form a message. She slowly looked back at him again with her eyes twitching, and he winked at her as he coyly clicked his tongue.

“Writing something with beans on a bean pile…. HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO READ THAT CLEARLY?!”

With a swift downward kick, she dunked his whole face inside the bean stand’s container - its contents flying violently to the streets.

* * *

 

“You know… like I always say to you,” Hanbei’s hand was cuffed with Magoichi’s as the latter dragged him. “Teamwork, Magoichi. You do the menial work on the field, while I should be in the office processing the result of said menial work. Teamwork.”

“Yeah? You’d probably sneak a nap if nobody keeps watch instead. Where’s the teamwork in that?” Magoichi answered dryly.

“Hey! It’s only because I finish those paper works already when people see me! You’re making me stall precious administration time!”

Magoichi loudly sighed at the complaints that were backed by a reasoning he personally thought pretentious from Hanbei. Entering a quiet suburban-like neighborhood, Magoichi unlocked the cuffs, letting his and Hanbei’s hands apart.

“Alright, let’s just finish checking this place quick, then go and process whatever we find here. How about that?” Magoichi said.

Hanbei groaned lazily again. “There goes my extra three hours…”

“Oi… show some more dignity. You’re representing this whole city. And why are you being reminded by a mercenary you hired?! Seriously…”

As the two began walking to each house, while also patrolling for any possible crimes, Hanbei quipped, “Magoichi, you really don’t know how bureaucracy works, do you? You can’t just go and do things as you please,” Seeing no response, he continued as he took a stretch of his arms, “Ahh…. Let me tell you, you’re gonna be in a lot of trouble if you keep this attitude of yours.”

Magoichi growled slightly as he emptied one of the house’s suggestion box. Steeling himself from being further agitated, he continued patrolling around with Hanbei in silence.

Hanbei, who disliked the accidental serious air he created, tried to steer back the conversation with a cheery tone, “Hey! One thing for sure – We’re glad you can make it when we’re shorthanded! Word from the boss and me every time!”

Magoichi let out a sigh as he turned around, stopping the two’s patrol. “Oi… Let me focus on my job, alright? Don’t you have anything better than keep on blabbering about whatever-cares?”

“I told you, I should be in the office! Magoichi’s the one that dragged me along just because he’s lonely on the job!” Hanbei playfully pouted.

Veins clicked on Magoichi’s head as he noticed Hanbei’s teasing in between. “Who’s getting lonely?! Like I said, I’m dragging you so you can actually work instead of slacking off!”

All of a sudden, a cry for help reached their ears before they could argue any further. Magoichi made no second thoughts as the high-pitched cry called out again. Tying the suggestion filled bag, he sprinted to the source immediately, leaving Hanbei behind. He knew it was someone that needed his assistance right there that instant.

“You know… You wouldn’t be rushing this fast if that cry was lower-pitched…” said Hanbei as he followed by gliding on his disc.

“Shut up! I’m doing what he’d do at times like this!”

As the call for help was getting closer on every step, Magoichi made one last sharp turn at the road intersection. Dramatically screeching to a halt with his hand on the ground as he arrived, he immediately ran towards the caller soon after, “Oi! You okay?! I heard you- Wait, an old hag?!”

For his big mouth, Magoichi tasted the ground with the heel of the old lady on his head.

Hanbei flew in, landing right on top of the mercenary. “Aside from my assistant’s tactlessness, what seems to be the problem, fair citizen?”

The glare from the old lady dissipated with Hanbei’s calming gestures, and his in-your-face implication to Magoichi. “Oh, it’s terrible, deary…” She pointed at the house in front of her.

Hanbei and Magoichi, who just dusted the ground off from his clothes as he got up, inspected the front of the house, and they noticed empty displays for pots and vases lined up.

Hanbei cupped his chin as he focused his eyes on the sign hanging at the house’s closed gate. “Flowers by Ichi…. A florist?”

“Yes, deary,” The old woman nodded. She walked to the gate as she explained, “It’s a recently opened flower shop ran by a young lady, not long moved here.” She planted her ears on the gate’s wooden doors rather absent-mindedly as she continued, “But it’s almost been an hour since its opening hours and there’s no sign of her anywhere…”

Hanbei vaguely remembered coming across a residential report, and in the midst of the report of the current area he did recall new residents occupying a house with one of their names containing Ichi.

“Real estate just got more useless and useless if people can just come and move in willy-nilly,” He said to no one in particular. “Ah, but wasn’t that report written in thick red ink? Which doesn’t mean much, but eh…”

But now what was bothering him was that this recently occupied house was running a home business without any permit.

 But before he could enquire the old woman, as if his mind was read, she said, “Oh yes, she mentioned she got help from the temple to set this shop up.”

“The temple? You mean THAT temple?”

Before Hanbei could receive an answer, a clacking sound was heard as Magoichi locked their hands with the cuff again.

“Alright, we have more important things to do. Don’t worry lady, the prefects are on the case.” Magoichi half-heartedly waved his hand as he kept walking, dragging Hanbei with him and ignoring the protest from the old woman.

“Magoichi, that was really rude of you to cut our conversation like that! I mean really, an unlicensed shop from a suddenly occupied home? We were on to something!”

“Didn’t you hear the part with who owns the place? I won’t let you do what I think you’ll do. Besides, he probably wouldn’t let you if he knows about that.”

Hanbei could only take another heave of breath from Magoichi’s reasoning. “You know our boss has a position to keep too, right? Not like our free-spirited helping hand.”

Magoichi roughly pulled his hands, which Hanbei anticipated by flying up with his disc before the former could do so, turning the table to Magoichi as he was pulled upwards instead.

* * *

 

Switching his gaze left and right in quick seconds, Xu Shu shuffled his gaze through the crowd of people in the corridor of the train station.

“I think it’s safe, milady…” He nervously said.

“You have to be sure on that, Xu Shu! I don’t want him following us all the way here!”

“YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!”

A familiar, gruff shout that echoed childishness stopped the people on their tracks. Taking this chance to quickly recheck his surroundings, Xu Shu then confirmed to Oichi to hurry to one of the platforms.

* * *

 

Pushing the glass door behind him in a huff, Ujiyasu kept punching his forehead lightly with his fist.

Yinping, who had been waiting on one of the platform’s waiting seats, cheerfully came running to his side. “Papa! You got the VCD you wanted?”

“It’s VRD Mort, and does it look like I got it, you idiot?” He slumped to the seat Yinping just got off from.

Not understanding the directly sarcastic meaning behind his words, Yinping lightly tapped her chin with her finger and then said, “When I heard you shouting ‘You got.’, I thought Papa got it. But then a kid came in, and got the last one seriously. At least that’s what I understood…”

Ujiyasu’s eyes widened in response to her near incoherent but spot on bumbling. But before he could say anything, she continued, “Ah? Does this mean you didn’t so much get it than you lost instead? Like your dignity maybe?” Her innocuous conclusion reached the ears of the people that had been judgingly staring at the two’s direction as they nodded when they went their ways.

A child came out of the store with a VRD Mort on his hand.

“Ha!” He pointed sharply at Ujiyasu as he passed by.

Trembling as his face went red, Ujiyasu quickly sprang up from his seat. “Gah! Who needs this?! Let’s just go and get a bite to eat!”

“I’m sorry to say that she might be right on saying that…”

“Huh?!” Ujiyasu craned his neck to see Xu Shu and Oichi walking towards the waiting seats. “What, it’s you two? Didn’t I say we have nothing to do for today?”

“Forgive me, my lord…. But we have a problem in our hands…” Xu Shu turned to his mistress, who had been feeling very weary from being always cautious on her surroundings.

“Hmm? What’s wrong with you?” Ujiyasu asked Oichi.

“….You two were going to have lunch somewhere, right? Why don’t we talk it there?”

Ujiyasu and Yinping could only grunt in confusion to her unusually indirect response.

* * *

 

“COME ON! CHEW 32 TIMES AND SWALLOW FASTER THAN A LIGHTNING, WAR GOD GIRL!! TAKE WHAT YOU CAN BEFORE THEY CLOSE FOR THE DAY!!”

“GOT IT, PAPA!!”

“How did we cut to a scene like this…?”

Stack of food and row of drinks filled the table for four, mostly on Ujiyasu and Yinping’s side. Taking their rare chance to feast on a cheap all-you-can-eat buffet, the Warlord and War God wildly gobbled up their fill, audibly during lunch hours.

“…. So, Lord Ujiyasu…. About our problem….” Xu Shu pressed on with his hand gripped on his mouth.

“Hrmm? Ough…. Yea… Erm lirstenin’.” said Ujiyasu as he was still chewing and shoving food to his mouth.

“…. Very well, then… My lord, milady and I have a problem with somebody that it hindered our activities today…”

“Uh-huh….” Ujiyasu shoved a small portion of rice as he nodded.

“…. That person just shows up wherever we were and would always try to flirt with milady…. Always showing up and looking at milady like that… We… can’t shake this person off!”

Suddenly, Yinping coughed loudly and pounded her chest.

“Oi! I told you to chew 32 times,” He tapped Yinping’s back before muttering, “Crap… I didn’t get a napkin…”

“ARE YOU TWO EVEN LISTENING?!”

Xu Shu reflexively slammed the table as his chair also screeched loudly against the restaurant’s floor. The people finally stopped completely at what they were doing to see the commotion on the particular table.

“You might wanna sit down, Xu Shu… You’re making a scene…” Ujiyasu whispered as he pointed at their surroundings.

He bent down as he slowly returned to his chair. “You two aren’t exempt from that accusation, you know… Also, don’t use Lord Ujiyasu’s haori as a napkin, Yinping…”

“Alright, so I get your problem. This is basic trainer rule, really. As long as you’re not on their line of sight, they ain’t gonna challenge you. So just go when the guy’s not looking at your dir- rrrgh!” A solid fist spectacularly drilled Ujiyasu’s face before he could finish his advice.

“It’s not the time for your nonsense,” Oichi returned to her still position, rubbing her cheeks in worry as she explained, “No matter how many times I shoo him away, he just keeps coming back… Appearing out of nowhere and try to propose to me while also yelling about thick woods… HE RUINED SWEET BEANS TOO!” Her fists almost splashed the plates and glasses on the table. Ignoring the further attention she caused, she continued, “Talk about someone with no dignity, trying to woo someone you just met yesterday. Not to mention he’s already white-haired…. So past the expiration date, honestly.”

“Huh?!” Yinping gasped with her mouth full. “Papa, we have to help Sis and Xu Shu now! They can’t refill their fridge because of their bad guy!”

Ujiyasu lightly punched her head. “It’s not about the expiration date, you hungry idiot!”

The Warlord could only sigh, unsure on how to respond as he saw two of his followers told what happened with dejected, desperate eyes. He took a quick look around his table, before coming back to Oichi, “Hey, you showed him who’s boss already, right? He’d be pretty stupid if he comes back for like, what? The tenth time today? You’re pretty loaded with the prize money if that were true.”

“Didn’t you listen to me?! He just won’t give up even though I got the prize money every time I shoved him away with a tackle!”

“Milady, you didn’t take money from anyone! Though you did tackle him every time he shows up…” Xu Shu then faced his master with pleading eyes, saying, “My lord, everything we told you is true. As your loyal subjects, we ask you for protection against this person endangering milady’s safety…”

Ujiyasu groaned as he scratched his hair. “We’re just dealing with some desperate, love-struck, should’ve-thought-about-marriage-first-then-career moron. Besides, no one would be sane enough to uhh… Well… let’s just say your lady is gonna be fine even without me doing anything.”

“My lord, please remember what happened when we saw you today… Now’s a good chance for you to retain your image if you take care of this person…”

The Warlord’s face scrunched in resignation. “Goddamn… I never thought you can be this cheap too, you know?”

As a slam from his cane echoed across the restaurant, the whole restaurant already had their attention towards Ujiyasu’s table anyway. Something Ujiyasu conveniently ignored to the back of his mind.

“Alright, which one of you jacks shamelessly disturbed the peeaacce!” He dramatically paused after raising both his fist and intonation before continuing, “Of the city by letting their inner urges stalk this lady on this table!”

Xu Shu wildly flailed his hands in front, tongue-tied as he not so discreetly reminding his master, “D-D-Di-Dignified! You’re in no way being dignified by being pretentiously showy like that!”

Xu Shu hid his face under his hood as Ujiyasu started to patrol around the restaurant, chest thrusted forward, left arm firmly bent down, thinking a quick sophisticated line before shouting further, “Come out, you villain! Or are you too scared when the guy finally makes an appearance?!”

“WHO’RE YOU CALLING A VILLAIN?! I’M NOT SCARED OF NO VILLAIN!!”

“THE UNNECESSARILY SHOWY CREEP THAT’S BEEN FOLLOWING MILADY SUDDENLY BURSTS OUT FROM THE BUFFET TABLE WITH A WRONG FOLLOWUP!”

“Hehe… Xu Shu’s being that obvious story guy again!” giddily pointed out Yinping with her mouth full.

Raising his brows before theatrically turning to where his sidekick narrator screamed. As he came face to face with his opponent, his eyes twitched, and he muttered, “Oh God…”

The opponent, after crawling out from the table with whatever esteem he assumed he have like another animal-themed stalker, raised his eyebrow in amusement.

“PERHAPS THOU ART THE VILLAIN!” The strange white haired man returned to his character, two folds too much. “FEAR NOT MY FAIR FLOWER! I SHALL FREE YOU FROM YOUR CAPTOR’S CLUTCH!”

Ujiyasu could not keep his showy façade much longer in front of his embarrassing opponent. He was about to turn around before Oichi suddenly clutched his arm and nestled into it.

“I’m sorry, my savior…” Her tone was noticeably dry despite her smiling face. “But this man here is my love. My one and only true love!”

“YOUR WHAT?!”

“Keep your voice down, Xu Shu!” She quickly scolded.

Ujiyasu’s face jumbled in shock from her sudden declaration. As the whole restaurant fell into a shock, possibly explaining why the manager had not shown up to kick them all out yet, Ujiyasu whispered between his teeth to her, in a raspy tone, “Oi..!! What’re ya doin’..?!”

“This is what people call a plan, Ujiyasu…” She replied, equally raspy. “Look at ‘im! He’s so shocked he’s probably literally heartbroken…!”

“Same goes for yer Xu Shu, ya idi- Gah!” Her fist nearly landed on his chin before he continued, “Th’t guy has sticky hands throughout his life! D’ya have ‘ny idea when ya lie like that to someone like ‘im?!”

“A duel.”

“Heh?”

“Urgh…” Ujiyasu exasperatedly sighed as his prediction came true before he could tell Oichi.

“A battle between two men of dignity. Of course, what dignity does a villain such as yourself possess in the first place?” The man across them tauntingly raised his eyebrows as he spoke. “Fear not, my fair flower! I shall overcome this trial and rescue your heart to mine!”

“Stop calling me your fair flower, prince dumbass.” Oichi, calmly as possible in the moment, insulted her creep out, which he took as a soothing cheer.

As tension began to rise and the pleading, possibly also still blackmailing-from-seeing-his-tirade-for-the-VRD-Mort-at-the-station eyes of Xu Shu, and Yinping taking his share of lunch again, Ujiyasu begrudgingly accepted the challenge from his opponent, if only just to go home quickly with his own dignity intact.

“Heh! I knew you wouldn’t let me down!” The white haired man then confidently declared, “High noon at the Odawara Square!”

“But it’s almost two in the afternoon…” Nobody paid attention to Ujiyasu’s protest about the time anyways.

* * *

 

Whispers and murmurs about the upcoming duel filled the afternoon, not noon as the challenger believed, air, as Xu Shu, Yinping and Oichi molded themselves with the waiting crowd.

“Wow… there’s so many people watching… We should be in the most front so we can cheer Papa on! Come on, you two!”

She was about to tug Oichi’s hand but the latter gently brushed her away.

“It’s fine, Yinping…. I’m sure Ujiyasu already knows we’re here. Think of it as we’re rooting in spirit.”

Her following assuring giggle somewhat managed to convince Yinping to stay where they were as the young War God tipped her toe again and kept a lookout.

But Xu Shu noticed at how unusually anxious she seemed ever since they left the restaurant, and he softly spoke to his mistress, “Fear not, milady… I’m sure my lord will come through for us.”

“Yes… I know we can trust him but…”

Her quasi response to Xu Shu was interrupted by an ear-piercing ring that silenced the waiting crowd.

The gathered spectators slowly made way, as the white-haired challenger slowly stepped into the middle of the square. With focused eyes and a firm grip, he planted his sword to the ground causing the intimidating sound to echo again. Unmoving from his position, he silently waited for his opponent’s arrival.

“Wow… that guy looks a lot different than we saw him last time.” Yinping said while cupping her chin.

“He’s like a completely different person…” Xu Shu trailed off as he unconsciously backed away.

Oichi observed the white-haired man from her distance, and to her worry she confirmed Xu Shu’s remark to herself.

_He’s completely composed… Really like the firmest of a firm tree..._ She shifted her gaze to his eyes. She could tell he was glaring sharply to the distance as he kept his stance. _He’s really serious! This man is definitely a dangerous opponent! What have I-._

She winced back to reality, by the same, booming noise from the rings of the man’s large sword as a strong gust of wind blew. Oichi quickly tried to recollect her strong demeanor, putting her personal worry aside, remembering Xu Shu and Yinping was there.

But Xu Shu instinctively reached out to his mistress, lightly tapping her shoulder with a comforting smile on his face, to which she forced herself to return it with her own.

“Oi, oi… What’s with these people? It was lighthearted a few moments ago.”

Yinping turned around to see Ujiyasu lazily standing behind Oichi and Xu Shu, drilling his pinky to his ears.

“Ah! Papa! You’re here!” She happily exclaimed.

“Huh? Are you the narrator now instead?” He dryly replied, which she innocently accepted.

“Lord Ujiyasu,” After taking a quick look at his mistress, Xu Shu slowly spoke, “You… don’t have to risk yourself again…”

“What,” Ujiyasu raised his brow. “You’re the one who blacknagged me to take care of this creep to begin with!” But he could confirm that both Xu Shu and Oichi were genuinely worried of his well-being, and especially by how the latter’s temper was more dormant than usual, proven by how she did not land a clean hit at him at the restaurant. Summarizing his own thoughts, he lightly smiled to both them before heading out to the center of the square. “Don’t worry, I’ll come back in one piece for you. No glass breaking or exploding bombs like last time, my love.” He added to tease Oichi’s plan.

Her fist lay still despite his flirting tone. She smiled in assurance, tugging Xu Shu, who almost called his lord out for his implied flirting, by the arm, and she let the Warlord go to his duel.

“Go Papa! You can count on me with my rods whenever too!” Yinping cheered on.

“You might cause Armageddon 1/1 instead with that…” Ujiyasu retorted as he walked on.

* * *

 

As another mandatory dramatic wind blew, the man smirked as he saw his opponent in red-black swaggering to the opposite end of his own position.

“Heh, so you came,” His sword brandished audibly as he removed it from the ground.

“Yeah, well I just want to get this thing done like a responsible adult. And then go home and finally try to get that one achievement with my dignity intact!” Ujiyasu said the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud.

“Ha!” The child at the forefront of the crowd nearly made Ujiyasu lose his focus as his eyes and hands twitched to the console and game he wanted. But the hearty laugh of his white-haired opponent snapped him back to reality.

“You really are the type that never backs down from a man to man duel! Even if there’s something better on your mind, like wanting a child’s toy!”

Ujiyasu narrowed his eyes, completely facing his whole body to his opponent again with the same confidence and dignity before the distraction appeared.

“Hahaha! Got your focus back? Now let’s start,” The rings ferociously yelled throughout the makeshift arena again as he plunged towards Ujiyasu, his sword gripped tightly above his head, and shouted, “DUUURRRYYYAAAN!!!”

The crowd collectively gasped as the armored man closed his distance to the other. Lazy leader or not, Oichi let out a small cry as the man with the ringed blade prepared to slash his sword downwards.

But before she could demand the whole farce to stop, Yinping yelled out, “Look out, Papa! He’s thick!”

“That’s not an understandable warning, Yinping!” Xu Shu quickly turned to his lord to warn him in Yinping’s stead. “My lo-!”

A loud gunshot erupted from the middle of the duel, silencing the crowd as the man who plunged himself to the air fell hard on his back, and making this whole duel possibly the loudest thing to happen on the square that distracted people’s speech or train of thoughts every few sentences, so Ujiyasu thought as the tip of his cane pointed diagonally to the air.

“Heh… Gung-ho but reckless,” Blowing the tip of his cane, he swaggered with a grin towards his downed challenger. “Like I ever come to these things without a gun on a walking stick. Well, a paint gun but… still, a gun.”

“Y-You…! Gun on a…!”

Ujiyasu cut off the loser’s words, “Hey, if you wanna swear just swear. Just do it when you can get back up, alright,”

“Urgh… M-My…” Showily struggling to breathe, his hands collapsed to the ground, and with a visible pink blot on his chest plate and cloth, he finally muttered, “Dry cleaning bill… will be… urgh…”

Making sure he dyed with dignity, Ujiyasu gently closed his defeated opponent’s eyes with his hands. “Rest easy overnight. You crazy old chum…”

Letting him go with a comforting, sly smirk, however he did that, Ujiyasu then waved triumphantly to his followers among the blank faced crowd. “Yo! I took care of your love-struck creep! With complete dignity...” With that word getting over his head without realizing it, he then energetically opened his arms wide. With dignity. “Now! Bombard me with praise and respe- EEECCHHHH?!!”

And bombarded he was with produce and jeers, instead of praise and respeeecchhhh.

“That’s for wasting our time, ya jerk!”

“Even Kappa Riders give out better stunts than that!”

“Go back to the fire nation!”

“Yinping, why’re you throwing tomatoes too?!” Xu Shu asked bewilderedly, “And fire nation…?”

“Huh? Everyone’s suddenly throwing things at Papa. I thought it’s what we’re supposed to be doing.” She then gave the coins she had to a passing vegetable vendor. Seeing nothing else available aside from one large pumpkin, she took it and threw it towards Ujiyasu with blissful ignorance.

“Gahah! Stop wasting farmer’s hard work, you idiots! Don’t you realize how hard it is to take care of these-!” The pumpkin landed perfectly on Ujiyasu’s head, as he was about to muffle, “crop…” and so he went out cold.

As the crowds was starting to leave in a huff, and every vegetable vendors ending their most profitable day, the one child with the last VRD Mort came towards the naturally dyed by produce Warlord, putting the handheld to his hands out of pity, and then left shaking his head in disappointment.

“My lord…”

“Wow...! You can restock your fridge now, Xu Shu!”

As Xu Shu carried their master, and mushy leftovers in Yinping’s case which Xu Shu sternly yelled her out to put it back down out of hygiene and moral purpose, Oichi lightly giggled to herself as she noticed a pattern with Ujiyasu when he did try to help, reluctant or not. Leaving the makeshift arena behind them, she made sure to hold on to the pity handheld for the next time Ujiyasu would return to his senses.

* * *

 

As dusk began to fall on Odawara, Magoichi, loudly complaining to himself for letting Hanbei get away while he massaged his sorely dragged wrist, entered the square as people gathered around one particularly messy point which caught Magoichi’s attention.

Then as he mixed himself with the crowd, his throat reflexively croaked as he saw what was being the center of attention: a man with pink dye on his armor and hands, surrounded by mushes of tomatoes and, weirdly, pumpkins.

“Big Bro Sun Jian!” Magoichi instantly ran to the man’s side, ignoring the crowd completely. “What happened?! Who did this to you?!”

“The lady…” he slowly spoke, hand weakly reaching out. “The… beautiful… lady… she’s… by a man… in black-red…”

It was then that Magoichi knew what to do, despite his last question was completely unanswered, nor was his first one was answered in the first place. Cursing to the man in black-red under his breath, he set out to prepare his next move, leaving a frightening chill among the people on the square.

“…. Why did he just leave me here, when I clearly need medical and emotional attention…?”

And so Sun Jian endured staying on the ground, while sulking loudly, until someone was nice enough to bring him back to his quarters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "My Boss Jian got rejected again sense is tingling! Better nap twice as fast and then pick him up!"


	14. Every shooting gallery is rigged.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What do you mean we forgot to do a summary in the last chapter?! In less than 20 words? It's almost 5 sentences with this one?! Urgh... In love and war everything is licit? What will our hero-

“Alright, listen up! The boss got humiliated!”

Hanbei’s company chattered among themselves in bewilderment before Hanbei continued to yell, “Alpha team, investigate downtown! Gold team, pay for the dry clean! Any questions?!”

Silence fell to the company after Hanbei gave out his orders. Suddenly one of his men, an unremarkable balding man in red happily cheered in hopes of attention and breaking the tension, “Crimson team rules!”

The man screamed, censor-wise gracefully, as he was sent to his post via sky-view by a launch pad that appeared by the snap of Hanbei’s fingers.

“Now move out!”

One more snap of the finger caused the rest of the company to hop around before jumbling away from the meeting point.

Hanbei stretched and sighed in relief for one workload done from his list. His small moment of repose was interrupted by a chilling, monotonous murmur that could be mistaken as a mantra behind him.

“Guy in black-red…! Guy in black-red…!” Magoichi then vowed to shoot his target down as the musket on his hand cocked loudly when he prepared to leave.

Hanbei was aware of Magoichi’s steely yet, by the dated definition he knew, killingly frightening resolve. But at this point, Hanbei would not be able to stop the mercenary no matter what words he would use. He sighed in concern, but then coolly went on with his own work of checking on his boss, while also hoping that Magoichi’s target would know what was going to happen to him.

* * *

 

“’Scraping barnacles’ they said… ‘Wow… that sounds like fun!’ she said… ‘Then out of plot convenience, the crazy priestess told everyone but me to man the temple!’ some GM said…!” The side of a metal boat deafeningly screeched as Ujiyasu forcibly removed a persistent barnacle. “’PFFOOTTY..!!’ I said.”

As his rambling suggested, Ujiyasu had been working alone at the docks after, most definitely reluctantly, having agreed to take a request there.

“Gold fishes… What would they know?” He grumbled audibly as he lowered his platform and taking the filled bucket away.

“Hey! I ain’t a cold fish!” One worker took offense to Ujiyasu’s rambling as the latter passed by.

“Heh! Try scraping barnacles with only a spatula like those undersea talking fishes, then talk to me about being a cold fish, you fish!”

“STOP SAYIN’ FISH, YOU FISHY GRAMPS!!” The worker exaggeratedly pointed at Ujiyasu from his platform.

“HUH?! YOU WANNA FISH IT OUT ON THE DOCKS, FISH BRAIN?!” Ujiyasu rolled his sleeves after coarsely throwing the bucket away, entering his fists into what he imagined as a street fighter loop.

As the burly workers’ boss could attest to, before more embarrassingly forced fish related trash-talk erupted, he called Ujiyasu in an exasperated tone and said, “We know ya don’t like it here, so… just keep scraping barnacles from them boats there…” He pointed at the completely covered boats on the further side of the dock.

Ujiyasu’s eyes widened before he started cursing under his breath, keeping note that Xu Shu and Yinping would need a lesson in fortitude in its most literal sense the next time he would see them, too grumpy to remember the former’s mistress and the latter having way better chance of her instead teaching Ujiyasu fortitude.

* * *

 

Magoichi violently banged his head against the wall, teeny inches from him, as he could not manage to find his target through his viewfinder. He shook in anger as he growled before going on his soliloquy, “Guy in black-red…! When I find you I’ll fill your throat with lead! Then I’ll use your blood stained tongue to paint my boat! And then… HA! The last man laughing will be me, and my bro that you hurt with that pink stain of yours!”

“Honey… the waste bin is doing a creepy monologue and has something sticking out!” A clearly frightened citizen ran off with his trash.

Magoichi paid no mind and pressed on with his stealthy search, by walking around in broad daylight inside a trash bin. His patience was at its limits, as nobody around him matched the information he knew.

Suddenly a cup with a straw hit him on the head as he was coming up with an alternative. He was about to call out on whoever threw that at him before noticing the cup had a note on it.

“The docks…” He read it aloud. “Must be from the goddess of victory that bro always talks about! I owe ya one, Starbaks!”

He laughed in a deranged way as he ran towards his destination, terrifying more people at the idea of a sentient disposal unit running around near their homes or shops.

* * *

 

Magoichi walked into the docks, unsubtly sneaking inside while leaving a trail of trash people had thrown to his bin. He then planted himself next to a large dumpster, ignoring the strong organic stench while scouting for his target once again.

“OUGI!! BURNING SPATULA OF BARNACLE FLIPPING!!”

Not one minute passed and a raspy voice of an irate sailor destroyed Magoichi’s concentration. Ignoring any rational thought for his, to him unwittingly, self-imposed mission, he almost jumped out of his disguise to demand whoever shouted to shut his piper. But then he noticed: That irate, presumed, sailor matched every what little lead he had. The guy in black-red was there at his most vulnerable, no weapons attached and passionately scraping barnacles.

“Checkmate… Lucky I don’t have to go asking for sailors.”

Magoichi then reflexively moved closer for the kill, following nothing more than his instinct on personal vendetta. While also bringing his smelling trash disguise with him.

* * *

 

Ujiyasu put down his spatula after managing to completely scrape one of the boats clean, both from the barnacles and paint.

“Only nine hundred more barnacles to go before I’m a true barnacle scraper of whatever kingdom.” He emptied the content of his bucket to a bin he passed by without looking at it, before moving on to the next boat.

But then, a borderingly sarcastic, sinister chuckle stopped Ujiyasu in his tracks. “Wait, how do you make that kind of confusing description sort of laughter? And who’s there?”

Ujiyasu turned around, only to see the bin that he was not sure he just passed by a few seconds ago. Bothered by the presence of trash, he covered his face and tried to shove the bin away with his foot.

“You…”

“What?!” Ujiyasu quickly pulled his foot back as his eyes stared in bloodshot at the bin. “Oh no… Don’t tell me… Those dark creatures followed me here…”

Then out of the blue, a man covered in barnacles and objects preferred to be left as miscellaneous to Ujiyasu’s eyes burst out, straightly pointing his musket at the Warlord.

“AAHHH!! What the hell are you?!” Ujiyasu shouted with his hands up in reflex.

“Name’s Magoichi Saika. You dyed my bro. Prepare to die.”

Ujiyasu quickly rolled away as his sudden assailant coldly pulled the trigger, sending a ricochet against the boat’s surface.

“Waiwaiwait! The Warlord wildly waved his hand back and forth to the man while still on the ground. “What’s going on here?! Why’re you almost quoting something that’d make you look repugnant to real life women?!

The abnormal gunman in the bin approached Ujiyasu, while wiping all organic trash off him. “You rolled out all your luck! This time you’re done for real!”

Right past the musket pointed at his direction, the crazed, sharp eyes of its wielder hit Ujiyasu in his memory. “You’re that guy on top of that bus! The guy that tried to blow me up!”

Without any response, his assailant viciously thrusted the bayonet to Ujiyasu’s chest. His reflex still with him, Ujiyasu kicked the musket to his side, narrowly misdirecting the point blank shot from the pulled trigger. He then immediately recovered and ran towards the opposite direction of his would be killer; the cluster of boats waiting to be scraped.

“Running won’t save you…”

With every loud gunshot heard from behind, Ujiyasu instinctively dodged the flashing bullets, wildly strafing as he searched left and right for a cover. “What’s wrong with you?! I don’t remember anything to do with your bro or whoever-! Ack!” A bullet missed him by an inch as Ujiyasu somehow managed to swiftly bend on his back. Seeing almost no option, he immediately dashed to take cover on one of the small boats docked.

“I told you, you can’t run!!” The mercenary, turning his fury into a raw power, kicked his bin flying to his target.

“Ee-haay!” Ujiyasu almost tripped by the bin that sharply landed in front of him. His body voluntarily sprang, landing him dully to the boat. His assailant approaching and with no chance to rest his soon cleared head, he began to look for anything to defend himself on the boat. “Yes, a life jacket! I’m saved…? Crap!” He punched the deck as he cursed his luck.

* * *

 

Yinping’s face paled as she suddenly gasped anxiously, dropping the bell she was carrying.

“Wha-jaja-at?! Yinping, what’s wrong?!” An almost crushed Xu Shu asked worriedly.

Her gut feeling pushed her to move without a second thought. She ran out of the temple complex, following where her legs would lead her.

Xu Shu immediately chased after her, weaving the crowds they ran past. From behind her in a huff, he asked again, “Yinping! What’s going on?!”

“I forgot to flush the toilet at the castle!”

Xu Shu’s will to chase after her quickly disappeared as he just stood there with an empty expression. He quietly walked back to the temple, lamenting Yinping’s carelessness and the pointlessness of all this.

* * *

 

“I see you!” Magoichi eerily muttered as he caught up to his target.

“Oh s-!” The man in black-red hastily grabbed the life jacket he found along with a small box, and jumped away to the water just as Magoichi opened fire.

Magoichi jumped aboard the now vacant boat, scanning the waters for obvious trail and shadow of his cowardly mark. Then right at the corner of his sight, an opposing current flowed, hinting possible movement there. Magoichi assumed the obvious tactic the man would be going for, considering what he took. He then rummaged the pocket case he always carried on his hips, at first only to feign reloading, but his calculating mask slightly faltered when he realized there were no more bullets left.

But Magoichi soldiered on, betting on the bullets left on his musket. “Gotcha right where I want you,” The tip of his finger firmly pressed on the trigger, then in a blink, his arm redirected his aim to his back. “Over here!”

The sound of a hard splash behind him signaled a bullseye, so Magoichi’s experience told him. He devilishly smirked as he chalked one up in his mind, turning to see the hole between his target’s eyes.

“Huh…? It’s just an empty box of bait wrapped in… black-red coat...” Magoichi then understood what was going on, his anger spread to himself for falling to a variation of the obvious tactic, and he hurriedly turned around and angrily shot his remaining bullet. “What the…? He’s not even there?! Where did- how did he-?!”

In his confusion, he did not notice the thin line and hook had snagged the trigger, realizing it too late when his weapon was pulled away with much force that nearly tripped him.

Magoichi hastily straightened his feet for balance, turning his sight eyes to where his weapon was pulled, only to see it hanging by the fishing pole of his smug-faced target.

_I can’t believe it…! This guy…!_ The corners of Magoichi’s eyes sharpened, his teeth clenched audibly to his ears, whatever boast or insult about the newly appeared portable fishing his supposed corpse in front of him muttering completely blocked from his hearing, he violently sprang from the boat, quickly closing the distance between him and the other man.

He couldn’t afford to lose. When shooting failed, there was always hand to hand combat, so Magoichi thought hastily. He thrusted his fingers at the other’s eyes, while also sneakily trying to reach his own firearm with his other hand.

Ujiyasu swiftly threw the musket behind, grabbing the incoming thrust with his now free hand. He noted the musket was now swinging to the right side, and he swung the fishing rod to let it keep its momentum. “Gurrgh!” But a blow by the knee to his stomach staggered him, and the musket swung back prematurely to the crazed marksman’s back.

Magoichi quickly reached his arm to his back, only to see the man in black-red had already lowered the musket to his own feet. In his haste, he accidentally kicked it away back to the other man. He cursed his luck in his mind, but he tried to keep his focus. He aimed to trip his opponent’s unguarded feet, catching his opponent by surprise from Magoichi’s quick recovery.

“Wha-?! Garghargh!” His rusty feet could not keep up, also from the weight of his soaked pants, and Ujiyasu timbered to the side while desperately keeping his grip on the fishing rod. He immediately caught wind on what the marksman was aiming for. He shifted his focus to his feet and, in a fantastic, not exactly plausible in 3D, kicked the musket to the air.

“What?!” Magoichi shouted in disbelieve. Justifiably.

Ujiyasu forcefully sprang himself and kicked the musket further away to the back of the marksman. _Urgh… I shouldn’t have forced my poor old legs…_ He stood up, unbalanced with his left leg twitching, but soldiered on for his own survival.

The reel whirred loudly the musket flew away, but Magoichi, as fast as his growingly exhausted hands allowed him, grabbed the strings, pulling it back to his direction while steeling himself from the resulting cut.

_Crap damn, is this guy nuts!_ Ujiyasu thought as he also watched closely for his assailant’s next move. _As crazy as a police samurai tracking down a painter on a roof…_

His opponent teetering and his weapon technically in hand, the tip of Magoichi’s mouth slightly tilted upwards as he took his chance. He slashed his elongated bayonet towards the vulnerable man – The string swerved back at a frightening speed.

“Haargh!”

The wet man rolled right to his direction – Just what Magoichi had anticipated. He highly raised his hard as rock boot towards the neck, chalking his victory as the sole got closer. “Sayonara, you persistent bastard!”

And as he anticipated, the man in black-red pulled away his weapon… Resulting in Magoichi to tumble backwards before he managed to land his stomp. _Wha-?! Why am I fall-!_ His body landed, leaving dusts to scatter before he could finish his dumbfounded thoughts. He immediately noticed he could not freely move his body, restrained by a tangled string. He frantically searched left and right, only to widen his eyes and gasp as he further realized, _M-My musket!_

And so he found it: pointed at a point blank range between his eyes, by the man that was supposed to be defeated by him. The man’s ragged face, dripped from sea water and sweat from the struggle, was permeated with a clear victor’s smile.

“Bang.” Ujiyasu playfully emulated the sound and force of a shot gun. He let out a deep sigh to catch his breath, as he relaxed his stance. “These things ain’t toy, you idiot. Someone could’ve gotten killed by this,” Ujiyasu then slowly put his finger at the sharp bayonet attached before prematurely pulled away with a wince. “Yeah… Just touching could probably kill me…”

Magoichi stayed laying still, his eyes wide and glued to his opponent as he started to cut away the tangled string from the fishing rod. The defeated marksman was befuddled throughout, having no more will to attack further.

“There. Take better care of yourself with that. I’m sure whoever your bro is would be happy he has a cover if you use that wisely, heh…”  He gently lay down the musket to the ground and teetered away as he mumbled loudly of why none of the sailors on the other side of the docks were helping him throughout the whole ordeal.

* * *

 

An impressed whistle came out of Hanbei’s mouth as he watched from one of the dock’s crane. “That was pretty intense! So that’s the Lion of Sagami, huh boss Jian?”

Sun Jian, cladded in his newly cleaned golden armor uniform, along with some bandages on his face, proudly stood beside Hanbei with his arms crossed. “Haha! He got me and Mago good, I can tell you that much.”

Hanbei chuckled along his superior’s hearty reaction, confirming his question answered. “That was pretty deceptive of him to beat his way out like that. I think he might be fun to test some of my stuff on.”

Sun Jian laughed again, saying to Hanbei, “You’re just going to end up painted like me if you’re not careful with him,”

Sun Jian, the prefect of Odawara, followed his eyes to see Ujiyasu having another verbal fight with one of the workers. “Despite all these years, he hasn’t lost his inner self. He’s a soft-hearted man with a hardened principle indeed,”

Hanbei winked in affirmation as he then said, “Well, now that Magoichi learned to lighten up a bit, I guess you want me to keep that new flower shop around, right?”

“Ah, could you? Please?”

In the distance Magoichi looked up to the clear sea sky, took a shot at it with his musket, only for it to produce the sound of an empty round. He peacefully smiled, taking his leave from the docks. “Sorry guys… I missed this one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Oh no! The toilet is clogged!"


End file.
